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Funny things heard on the USS Gorkon


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Posted
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Stoyer:  Ok, got one.   Would you rather have found the love of your life?  But during the day she is a hawk and during the night you are a wolf.  You can see each other briefly during sunrise and sunset.  Or never have loved at all?

"During the day she is a hawk" 🤣

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There was a gentle hiss, and a disgusting bit of brown discharge released from the clamps. Gnaxac moved his head slightly so that it didn’t drip on him. Despite the fact it looked delicious.

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Squeezing his shoulder with a wrinkle and rosy smile, Doz disappeared and left Gnaxac alone with the forbidden chocolate lubricant. The temptation was oh so real, but he knew he didn’t want to spend any time in sickbay so he resisted…

 

Or did he?

😂

Nancy Pelosi Matilda GIF

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Posted
10 hours ago, Doz Finch said:

"During the day she is a hawk" 🤣

OMG!  It's Ladyhawke!

https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0089457/

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  • 4 weeks later...
Posted
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Marshall: ::Quietly,:: I could probably clone Caedan from the amount of DNA he's left in my quarters over the years. 

Excuse me? ::blinks::

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  • 2 months later...
Posted

This caught me off guard 😂 @Samira Neathler

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A world now ruled by the Borg, which resulted in another name for the cocktail, ‘Resistance is Fruitile’.

 

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  • 2 weeks later...
Posted

This made me laugh devilishly, @Vylaa. How dare! But true. 😂

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The zhen had no doubt of the truth of that statement.  She’d herd some of Doz’s stories.  And then heard more of Doz’s stories.

The human really liked to talk, more than most pinkskins…

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Posted

Laughed out loud at this, @Genkos Adea

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Gnaxac: There was one time I woke up upside d-d-down in a loo…

And then laughed again at @Vylaa's response,

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zh’Tisav: Woah!  Nevermind!  No toilet stories, I spend enough time changing diapers...

 

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  • 1 month later...
Posted
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Across the Bridge, Ayiana heard Jo chuckle.

 

Marshall: This is risky, unorthodox, and decidedly a bit mad…

 

Sevo: ::Ayiana grinned. :: You know we love madness on this ship.

 

@Jo Marshall & @Ayiana Sevo

alice in wonderland disney GIF

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Posted

One of our teams was faced with an unresponsive door. Until, @Vesela Pace worked her magic on it, well partly... 😁

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Vesela closed her eyes, scrunched her nose, and pulled as hard as she could on the manual override lever. The door squeaked a bit as it partially opened. There was about a foot of space between the door and the frame now.

 

Pace: Well, it sort of worked!

 

 

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Posted
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Pace: Well, it sort of worked!

Solkon: Unfortunately, ‘sort of’ working does not help our situation.

 

logical star trek GIF

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 Variety was the spice of life, even for the Borg, even if their spice rack likely contained flavours like "collective coriander" and "thyme-travel".

I laughed out loud at this. 😂 @Jo Marshall

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  • 2 weeks later...
Posted

Loved this snippet from @Nera Ay's sim:

 

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((Turbolift, USS Gorkon))

Turbolifts were a wonderful piece of engineering. Quick, quiet, and reliable, exactly what one needed on a Starship. The lifts connecting the various decks had been installed with this in mind; they had not been designed for large groups of people however. 11 individuals and a baby made for a very tight, very uncomfortable fit.

There was a human phrase Ay had come across, packed like sardines in a can. It was appropriate in this context.

Ay had tried sardines after hearing the phrase for the first time. He wasn’t a fan of them.

This fish-themed train of thought inevitably led him to another phrase humans liked, that related to fish and crowded spaces. Like shooting fish in a barrel….how dark the mind can turn with so little prompt.

So far the lift hadn’t moved. They waited with bated breath for someone to give the destination, all eyes figuratively turned to one Tahna Meru.

Tahna: Deck eighteen. There’s some interior storage we’ll head to.

 

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Posted
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Carter: Moisture beads.  Normally they’re mixed into soil to maintain moisture levels, but dry they’re just little marbles.  Could be a tripping hazard, if you know what I mean.

Yes. Do this immediately.

Once Upon A Time Falling GIF by HULU

 

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Posted
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Solkon: Perhaps we can talk about our childhood toys when we are not at risk of assimilation, Doctor?

Canadian Lol GIF

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ARIA drifted off of Taelon’s shoulder and past the group into the hall, the beam of its scanner faintly visible in the air. Taelon held up his tricorder behind it, frowning. Taelon’s reticence continued, and it was ARIA itself that spoke, its mechanical voice soft and faintly musical.

This one is just an appreciation for ARIA, @Taelon's little droid. Always an enjoyable read 👏

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Posted

I did wonder why @Nera Ay came downstairs laughing earlier today.  

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Carter: You want to hoe them to death?

Also...I'm stealing this. 😝

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A few moments later, the memory clarified, all the lost half-remembered fragments slotting together again. The old man had been telling a story about starting fires….

Nera: We’ve got the tricorders, remember. With some adjustments you can set the scanner to fire a heated beam ::miming holding a tricorder up as a makeshift weapon:: It’ll be somewhere between 250 and 300 degrees Celsius.

The old man had used this for starting camp fires, burning propaganda; normal things, not as an actual weapon, though the application was certainly there

 

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Posted

You can thank @Vylaa for the wonderful "you want to hoe them to death" 😂

Trico-Turret is all yours! Have fun terrorizing the gamma quadrant with it. 

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Posted

Hey Gorkonites and Borg-visitors,

We have a winner!
 
 
Our beloved Ferengi with:
 
(Gnaxac) Gnaxac remembered dating an Andorian called Sour Zhiassa once, for about a week, before he realised 1) the nickname wasn’t just about her personality and 2) he didn’t really like girls.
 
Congrats Elliot.
 
Keep on writing those awesome sims and if you want to nominate a quote, let me know by DM, mail or smoke signals might work too.
 
Greetings Sami and the QotM-team.
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Posted
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Stoyer: I am sure they are enjoying the challenge.

“Enjoying” was probably not the word the engineers would use.

 

See Schitts Creek GIF by CBC

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  • 4 weeks later...
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Cain: This training won't be her only weapon. I'm fairly certain she could blind most species with sequins. 

@Tahna Meru

elizabeth banks GIF by Power Rangers

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  • 3 weeks later...
Posted
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Eostre: That is insanity, Ensign! Who was with you? When was this?

She’d seemingly forgotten whatever she’d found on him, pacing around him in a bit of a state. Those microbes could be all over the ship by now. What was wrong with people? They took their immune systems for granted. Then she snapped back.

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She didn’t really give him much warning before she turned the sprayer on him.

Loving our very own bacteria-hating-cleaning-frenzy Jacques! @Taelon

confused french GIF by Disney Pixar

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Posted

Ladies, gentlemen, aliens and ::beat:: non-aliens, (Yes we discovered lately we have non-aliens too.)

 
 
Congratulations to our Skipper who won with the quote:
 
Reynolds: Yes, we received that transmission from the USS Obvious some time ago.
 
Keep them awesome quotes and sims coming, we all love to read them and who knows maybe you'll be the next winner!
 
Greetings Sami and the QotM-team.
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  • 2 weeks later...
Posted
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Ruwon: Ah, I’ve been partially disemboweled. Rude of them, really.

Schitts Creek Pain GIF by CBC

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