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Segolene LeMarnix

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Everything posted by Segolene LeMarnix

  1. ((Dreamscape, Jaxx's Mind)) ::Standing in the bright white abyss, Jaxx looked at himself noticing he was wearing a silk Betazoid ceremonial robe. He was confused. There was nothing around him but light. He felt alone, not being able to see anything. He started walking, but quickly realized there was nowhere to go. The longer he walked, the more he was confronted with the same sight. Andrus felt lost, with no clear direction in mind. He became anxious as he realized he had no control over the situation. No matter how hard he tried, there was nothing he could sense. It was as if he were in a void that did not exist. After what seemed like hours, he finally stopped walking and sat on the ground. It had been years since he meditated. It was another part of his culture that was easier to neglect. Closing his eyes, he found it hard to center himself. There was no noise, no distractions...only light. After a few moments, he heard a voice.:: Saraa: ::in an angry tone:: What are you doing? ::Quickly, he opened his eyes. He looked around him in a panicked manner. Still, he could see nothing, feel nothing, sense nothing. He began taking deep breaths to enhance his level of calmness. A loud bang echoed around him. In an instance the light turned to darkness. Quickly jumping to his feet he began looking around once more.:: Saraa: ::in a voice from behind him:: You have forgotten? ::Quickly turning around, he expected to find someone. For the first time he could feel something other than the ground beneath him. A subtle breeze was flowing from what seemed like every direction. The air was warm and moist. Andrus could still sense no one. The vast existence that was now black, continued to house nothing. His emotions began to race. Was it her? How could she be there? Was he dying?:: Saraa: ::whispering:: Not yet... ::Turning around once more, he saw a shadow emerging from the darkness. The woman in front of his was an older reflection of the girl that died in his arms. He could not understand what was happening. He remembered his visit to the Mercury...returning to his quarters, but nothing afterward. He was flooded with questions that seemed more illogical than anything he had ever faced.:: Jaxx: Who are you? Saraa: Andy, you were never one for stupid questions....::coyly:: why start now? ::There was a slight gasp. He had not been called that in years. Even then, she was the only one that did. It was a sort of pet name that he allowed her to call him. The truth was, he hated his first name. Andrus was his fraternal grandfather's middle name. It was something that his parents thought was important. His brother Leton, was named after their maternal grandfather. His parents thought it was important to honor their memories. Jaxx watched the figure closely as it neared him.:: Jaxx: I find the question to be as valid as any other. ::shrugging:: I know very well who you look like, but since she is dead...you cannot be real. Therefore, you are either a figment of my imagination, or something else. ::The woman smirked slightly and folded her hands in front over her.:: Saraa: Something else will do for now. ::Jaxx felt as if he had no control whatsoever. He prided himself on his ability to command a situation. There was once when he was more docile, but the death of the woman appearing in front of him changed all that.:: Jaxx: Dammit, I want some answers! Saraa: ::snickering slightly:: Temper, temper. That is not the boy I once knew...he was so ::pausing:: carefree. Jaxx: ::rolling his eyes:: Things change, you for one should know that. ::Her death hit him hard. He was unable to stop it from happening, and her final breath was taken in his lap. They were betrothed, another great idea his parents had. He grew up with the girl and knew her well. As they matured, their parents thought genetic bonding would be the best course of action. She was the daughter of another house, and developing strong abilities. His mother, Bjenta, thought she was a prime candidate for introduction into their family. Back then, Jaxx did was he was told. He desperately wanted to do what was right for his family.:: Saraa: Life has a funny way of facilitating that change. So...I ask again. What are you doing? ::Jaxx looked at the woman quizzically. He was never one for mind games, and came to the realization that he was not in control. There was nothing he could do to change that fact. He stowed his anger, and shifted to his [...]y, sarcastic self.:: Jaxx: Apparently, I am standing here talking to the ghost of wars past. I figured you would have chains or something. Saraa: Well, that is a complete dramatization. Jaxx: ::laughing:: And you are not? ::tiling his head:: Tell me...what emotional response are you looking to illicit? ::The woman kept that smirk on her face as she began walking in a circle around him. He could hear her heals hitting the ground. It was the first time he could hear anything outside of her voice. It was growing hotter, and the air was slightly heavier with moisture.:: Saraa: Do not know...what is there? Jaxx: What is that supposed to mean? Saraa: Are you daft? Jaxx: I guess so...so how about you take a moment of your non-existence to explain it to me. ::shrugging:: I am obviously going nowhere, ::lowering his brows:: and I do like a good story. ::Jaxx kept spinning in one place as the woman did laps around him, slowly.:: Saraa: I die, and look at you! You have become a joke. Jaxx: I have actually been quite successful, thank you very much. Saraa: ::scoffing:: I forgot, captain sir...::giving a mocking salute:: That is not what I mean. You have never moved on. You have halfheartedly approached everything in your personal life since. So what? I died, Jazra died...it was WAR. What did you expect, uttaberries and sugar blossoms? ::Jaxx thought of the two women. He always felt guilty for falling for Jazra so quickly after the loss of Saraa. He tried over the years to justify what it was they shared. They were young, and he was grieving. Did he really use her to help get his mind off of Saraa? Or was it that she reminded him of Saraa so much? They were both among the strongest women he had never known.:: Saraa: Then Talon gets attacked and almost dies. As soon as that happened...BAM! You shut down emotionally. ::rolling her eyes:: Then there was the Morgan girl...do you have any idea how much she loved you? She knew that you were so unsure and so scared, ::raising her voice:: She was Betazoid! Did you think you could hide that from her? ::maniacally laughing:: Then there was the little Gideon...what was her name? Tressa? Way to screw that one up! Jaxx: Do not presume to know me! ::yelling:: You have no idea what I have been through! Saraa: Are you so certain about that? I know everything you are too afraid to admit to yourself! One of the most brilliant psychologists, and you are clueless when it comes to yourself. Your mighty career...does it keep you warm at night? Does it share your joy? Your fear? Your anger? ::leaning in and yelling:: NO! So, I will try again...::in a loud tone:: What...are...you...doing? ::Jaxx looked that the woman. He tried to wrap his head around what was going on. He could sense nothing from her, and felt at a disadvantage. What did she want from him? To talk about his personal life? It was irrelevant next to his career. He watched the woman and her expressions. It was as if she could sense every thought, even though he could not even sense her presence.:: Saraa: Your career is a pathetic replacement for love. You hated StarFleet! ::mocking his words as a teenager:: 'I will worry about Betazed, they can worry about everywhere else.' What happened to that, you sure seemed to join awfully quick. Jaxx: I finished school, and took a year off. Saraa: For your own form of retribution! What were you doing on Romulus? You ran right into the arms of the Federation and became their bloodhound! ::His eyes widened. His history between college and the Academy was classified, beyond StarFleet. He had never uttered a word about what he had done. It was not something he cared to remember. Those were different times, and he was still raging over the memories of the war.:: Saraa: Then you join the Academy, become an officer and you have never looked back. Offering up any personal joy as a sacrifice to the mighty pip! Jaxx: ::raising his voice:: You have no idea what you are talking about! ::In a moment, the woman morphed into the likeness of Sidney. His eyes widened slightly at the unexpected shift. A different flood of emotions began to surface. He recalled the night before, and the sleeping woman he left in his bed that morning. He centered himself and looked at the figure in front of him.:: Saraa(Sidney): And how long until you push me away? A month? Three? What is another broken heart? If you cared at all, you would end it now! We both know you are incapable of being happy. You still cling to all the pain in your past, and you use it as a scapegoat to seclude your feelings. Jaxx: ::shaking his head:: That is not true. I did all I could! ::Once again, she morphed into the likeness of Jazra.:: Saraa(Jazra): ::rolling her eyes:: Did you? It seems like the bare minimum is all you could muster. How long did it take you to see someone after I died? Six years? Eight? Jaxx: ::quietly:: Ten. ::The woman morphed into the likeness of Saraa once more. She stopped walking in he circles and stopped. She walked toward him and softly touched his face. The feeling of her skin was cold. He did not pull away, as there was no fear within him.:: Saraa: Why? You keep pushing them all away..what are you doing? Jaxx: I am not... ::Before he could finish his sentence the woman morphed once again into a copy of Jaxx in his uniform. Taking a step back, he looked at that man in front of him. The only thing he could sense was his own feelings. The man employed the same [...]y grin Jaxx had trademarked over the years.:: Saraa(Jaxx): What am I doing? ::Thinking for a moment, Jaxx looked at himself. He took a second to relieve everything in the past. It was all true. He was using his starship to run away from the very thing he could never escape...himself. Inside, he was still that boy fighting a man's war. The scars had never healed, and as soon as he was reminded of how great life could be...he shut down. For the fist time, he was able to identify the problem. Fixing it was another story altogether. Looking at himself, he finally had an answer...even though it was not much.:: Jaxx: I do not know, but I intend to find out...and fix it. ::The darkness deepened and once again there was nothing. The light, the voices...it was all gone and there was nothing there to replace it. He was unable to continue with his train of thought, but mentally he found himself reaching out...with nothing in sight. The darkness was all he knew, and all he could know.:: TBC Captain Andrus Jaxx Commanding Officer USS Apollo, NCC-71669 Captains Council Magistrate
  2. Happy Birthday, Chief. Hope you have a great day.

  3. Fantastic. I didn't encountered many sims that made me tremble. When I saw it at first I thought, "Oh no, just descriptions!" Then started to read and couldn't stop. Stream of thought reminds me of Philip K.[...] - whom I consider one of the best SF writers of all times. Even lot of hard, heavy words (some of which I understood only from context and will have to check them in dictionary) didn't take anything from the ease it flew and ease it's reading.
  4. ((Space)) ::Within the eternal silence of the all encompassing vacuum, there was only death. Where life erupted outwards from the violent conflagration of a million tiny points of light, darkness remained ever patient for the moment of ambuscade; where atomic motion and cellular mechanisms coalesced to contrive creations never before imagined, the inveterate Cimmerian shade began its inevitable encroachment on life's sojourn. Life, despite its ignorant declarations, did not endure. Only annihilation endured as the darkness of the universe closed in and suffocated everything it surrounded.:: ::And in time, all that existed sought absolution.:: ::The Terran beings had a saying; nothing lasts forever. But they too were shortsighted even in this. Going about their inconsequential routines, seeking out meaning, matriculating upon new paths, and evolving, the tiny, complex combinations of pieces that were at one time stars, rode furiously straight into oblivion. Reaching out into the heart of caliginosity had only prolonged the inexorable truth that the end was just around the corner.:: ::But the Terrans, and their allies, were inconversant with the very universe they traversed and professed to understand. Though they could see into the inky blackness, they did not know her. They did not recognize the persistent tightening of the noose, nor, in their self-proclaimed enlightenment, did they comprehend the nefarious malignance that was inherent within the very absence of all. Nothing was intrinsically auspicious as the creatures believed. And it would be that belief that would guide them all to a potentially premature eradication.:: ::Contrary to the purported cogitations of those same creatures, who, in reality, knew far less than their egotistical minds asserted, space was far from the vacuous vacuity it was postulated to be. No, it was saturated with things and concepts that the fracturable beings could never hope to comprehend. Waves of information traversed vast distances in ways yet to be discovered by the simple minds housed within the metallic structure, against which those very swells broke as if they had found their way to some cosmic beach. With the compounded force of the universe's lackadaisical stance and the pernicious tendencies of the dark nonexistence, it reverberated through the so-called marvel of Terran engineering at incomprehensible speeds.:: ::What was not known, or understood by those that resided within, was that the constricting tendrils of suffocation, made of the timeless endurance of nothing, had allies. If there was an inherent malevolence all around that simply waited out life as it came, and went, there was an even more inherent defect in life itself. Where the nothing remained apathetic and patient, life was filled with the whims of loathsome indifference, obscene greed, vile lust, and an overwhelming need to create pain while tearing the good asunder. Life, as it were, took care of its own annihilation, leaving the [...]able nonentity to snuff out only the dying embers of it all.:: ::In time, the war whose existence made itself known on the trails of subspace waves and informative streams the Terran's were unable to detect would also pass, but not before oblivion laid claim to souls too numerous to count. Klingons, Romulans, Terrans and many others would be caught up in the righteous event, each seeking something that even the bulk of spinning metal in space knew to be only a weak dream of mildly sentient life. Altruism was a laughable ideal; love did not exist outside the minds of the most fragile of all species in the universe. And yet, they fought. They simply did not know what they truly fought against.:: ::The wispy fingertips of asphyxiation reached now for the structure that seemed so huge to the creatures that inhabited it, but which, it knew, was really barely an afterthought within the context of the enormity of the universe. They grew ever closer as a prodigious shadow fell across two empires and began to devour it all.:: -- 'Starbase 118's Perspective' Simmed by Captain Kalianna Nicholotti Commanding Officer Starbase 118 / USS Victory
  5. ((First Officer’s Quarters, USS Apollo)) ::A puff of steam rose from the plain white mug that sat alone on the small dining table. It lingered for a moment, as if testing the air around it, before finally dissolving into the nether. In a chair that matched the architecture of the table, with her chin on her knees, her knees pulled up to her chest, and her arms around them, Cayden sat in the silence and found herself simply watching the steam that the mug of coffee was emanating. The simplistic nature of the moment, in a dimly lit room that was supposed to mimic the luminosity of the early dawn, caught her mind somewhere between the delicate fantasy of a dream and the much harsher way of reality; in a place where she walked with herself.:: ::There were no sounds, save for those of the breaths she took and the subtle hum of the ship as it too breathed around her. So often these days, noise filled the air around her. So often, her mind was filled with the darker simulacrums of her past or the brilliance of her future, but rare was it that she found herself caught within a moment in time. Rare was it that she found herself between the two ends of the vastly capacious spectrum. And yet here, as another puff of white steam met the cooler air that hung just above her table, it was in that existence that she now found herself lost.:: ((Flashback, 195 Years Ago, Trill)) ::Having rolled up the legs of his pants and tossed his shoes to the side, a rather good looking man grinned somewhat mysteriously at an equally stunning woman as they walked, arm in arm, down the length of an empty beach. The waves lapped softly up to them as they walked, missing their bared feet by only a few inches. White spray, filled with the scent of salt, splashed up around them as if responding to the tiny grains of dark brown sand that their own steps were tossing haphazardly into the wind that blew both of their hair back. In the distance, the sun was just beginning to fall down beneath the horizon, giving off the distinct impression that the star itself was dying as rays of yellow, red, and orange bled into the water and spread in the waves.:: ::The chill of the night was already upon them, and though the scene on the beach would lead onlookers to believe something else, the only warmth that existed in that moment was that caught within the fragile flesh that walked between the ever growing night breeze and the cold winter ocean. But the two continued to walk, unfazed by the chill or the growing darkness. Indeed, all light that was needed was provided by the stars, and as Rodan would have said, the look in her eyes.:: ((Flashback, 121 Years Ago, Aboard a Small Research Station in Low Planetary Orbit of Trill)) ::One day, she dreamed wistfully, the barriers that existed would fall. One day, the mind would understand far more than it did now and the stars themselves would be theirs to hold in the palms of their hands. There wouldn’t be the need to pick and choose between one way of living and another; both would be able to thrive within a rapidly growing exosphere that only expanded as knowledge moved forward. Diseases would be vanquished, pain would fade, and questions not even asked yet would have answers.:: ::A sigh escaped her as she stared out into the darkness of planetary night. It was the only period of an orbit where she could see the stars in all of their brilliance and glory. As such, she’d stop her work for just a moment each time the station passed into the darkness and let her thoughts travel along the very same cogitation. The future seemed so incredibly far away, and yet, it was something she was reaching for anyways. And while, in the end, she knew that it would not be her that was able to walk among those points of light that were the stars, at least she would be there in some manner of thought.:: ::Subconsciously, her hand moved to the area of her stomach where the symbiont had recently been placed. Still working on integrating the previous hosts memories into her own, she had requested this assignment, but now she wondered. Just how much isolation could she take? It was a question that she asked herself; one that mirrored the one her boss had asked her just before launch.:: ::Yet somehow, the answer she had given then – that she’d always have Rodan to speak with – held much less water now than it did then.:: ::The first glimmer of the sun could be seen as its light scattered across the atmosphere of the planet below. Within seconds, it would return to its complete blinding brilliance, and so, Eliza turned back to the terminal and began to run the numbers of the experiment again. Under the microscope, tiny nano probes began their workday all over again.:: ((Flashback, 64 Years Ago, USS Andromeda)) ::The darkness around him swirled and coalesced into images created by his own imagination. Beneath him, the bed seemed far softer than the chair he spent most of his time in during the day and when coupled with the soft tones of the ‘music’ he’d heard since the ship entered the area of space known as the Typhon Expanse, his body simply let the trappings of the day fade into nothingness. It was this time of the day he enjoyed the most; when the neoteric quiescence of night allowed the voices of the past to whisper directly into his mind. The very epitome of being Trill, it was in this experience that everything existed.:: ::Sleep, itself, never came easily, but he didn’t mind. He had freed himself from the constrictions associated with the uniform that lay draped across the back of a chair in the corner of the room that he could not see, but knew was there. And in his newfound freedom, deep contemplation danced a complex waltz with introspection. Intuition wrapped itself up in the ruminations of whatever situation faced them and answers were found.:: ::The dance continued long into the hours that constituted night aboard the tiny, when compared to the universe it explored, vessel that drifted nearly silently deeper into the perpetual night of space. With the continued backdrop of music, provided by the Expanse itself, Alaryc found a chance to really listen, and learn, from the history that had come before.:: ((Flashback, 17 Years Ago, USS Valor)) ::On the padd that was firmly grasped in her hands scrolled the words that answered every wish and prayer that she had ever had. They were simple, and they explained only what her next steps were, but it was one word at the top of them all that had her literally jumping for joy. Accepted. The word created ripples of elation within her entire body, instigating the intense flow of endorphins and bringing her to a level of jubilation she had never experienced before.:: ::Still tightly holding the padd, the young girl ran out of the quarters that she shared with her parents to share the news that she would not be sharing them for much longer. Everything she had worked for, and everything that she had wanted was finally coming true; having been accepted to the University in Medara, soon she knew that she would be leaving her current life behind. There would be no more red alerts, or danger, or stuffy air that was simply recycled through the ship. No more warp core centered discussions at the dinner table, and no more going over emergency procedures that would take her to the lifepods; Jazra was about to set out on a new course.:: ::It was a course that she had been striving for ever since she had first set foot on a starship. Having lived there most of her life, she had thrown herself into school, excelling past those that shared her age, and never making friends. Now, her long nights spent studying, and her lack of a social life, were finally paying off. And while she knew that her parents were still on duty, she didn’t care. This was something she needed to share, even if her running through the halls of the Valor brought quite a few strange looks. Even if the whole ship found her odd, or troublesome, or anything else. It didn’t matter anymore. All that mattered were the words; words etched into history on her padd.:: ((Flashback, 14 Years Ago, Trill)) ::It was funny how things often came full circle.:: ::Standing in the courtyard in the capital city of Mak’ala, Norah let his eyes take in sights the Adyr symbiont had not seen in quite some time. Around him, people came and went, busy in their lives and wandering about their business. Each of them seemed too caught up in the moment to think about what might come in the next, but that didn’t stop him from contemplating his own end. Having just been joined, the susurrations of Jazra, and those that had come before, were bubbling up in his mind. Together they sang, as if in a chorus of voices that gave him insight into his own end; an end that was coming towards him faster and faster, with no brakes available to slow inevitability down.:: ::And though the idea might have been disturbing to some, the old diplomat simply smiled at the oncoming cliff. His time had been long ago in days that were remembered with pleasant thoughts. Now, at least, he would be able to pass those moments on through the eyes of the symbiont he never thought he’d have. Perhaps, somehow, his experiences as a peace seeker, negotiator, and overall diplomat, would bring knowledge and patience to a place and time where it would really matter.:: ::Though pained by the circumstances of her death, and the intense feelings for a certain Betazoid man, Norah knew that it was all part of the grand scheme. Together, Jazra’s short life would coalesce with those that had carried Adyr prior and build a legacy unlike any seen outside the planet on which he now stood. It was in that legacy that he found peace. Death was certain to come find him, and soon, but with a legacy like he had now, what more could he ask for?:: ((End Flashbacks)) ::A final puff of steam floated towards the ceiling as the most recent host of Adyr looked on. History danced around in her head, coming together into stories that were far better than fiction as her coffee fell inevitably to an undrinkable temperature. Perhaps it was the lack of steam, or the fact that her legs were cramping from how she had been sitting for so long, but she suddenly knew that it was time to go.:: ::Standing, Cayden left the dining area and moved to the room to prepare for her day. In her wake, on the small dining table, sat a now-cooled mug of coffee that had not been consumed as one might have expected. Though it remained in the mug, and the mug on the table, it had become the catalyst for so much more.:: TBC --- Lieutenant Cayden Adyr Mission Specialist/Command Advisor USS Apollo
  6. Religion is for people who are afraid of going to Hell. Spirituality is for those who have already been there.

  7. Set a goal so big that you can't achieve it until you grow into the person who can.

  8. Only thing worse than seeing a bug in your house is losing it.

  9. Tongue has no bones, but is strong enough to break a heart. Be careful with your words.

  10. ((Ready Room, USS Apollo)) ::After finishing his discussion in the holodeck with Hugh, Jaxx thought of orbital skydiving. He started down the corridor and realized that he really was not feeling up to it. He considered heading back to the casino, but decided that it was getting late. Turning around, he headed toward the turbolift. He took the lift up to the bridge and quietly made his way to the Ready Room. As he made his way in, he poured himself some Saurian brandy. With the glass in hand, he picked up a PADD and moved over to the door on the back wall. As it opened, he stepped into the small "crash room" that was connected. It contained a bed, and a lavatory with a sonic shower.:: ::It was something new to the design of a starship. The thought was that there were times when a CO or XO would need to take a power nap during a crisis. Having a bed in the room kept them from having to leave the area of the bridge. He was not aware of many ships that had the accommodation, but was curious if all new classes contained the convenience. For Jaxx it was a way to avoid his quarters. He glanced to the uniform hanging up, as he took a sip of his beverage. They were on their way to the Trinity Sector, but he felt more stressed out than he did during the confrontation with the creature. He hated not knowing where and why they were diverted. Glancing down he looked over some reports on the PADD. Relations with the Klingons were not what they once were. During the Dominion War they were the Federation's greatest ally. Now they seemed to be acting like a spoiled child that had to have their way. The latest report placed a Klingon Fleet amassing in the Mempa Sector. Jaxx feared a power play for Romlulan held territories. It only made sense since that is where their destination was.:: ::It had been some time since he last visited the Trinity Sector. His last official action in the area was to transfer command of StarBase 118 to Commander Nicholotti. He found himself hoping there was time to see his old friend. No matter what, he would make time to visit with her before leaving he area. It was hard to tell when the next time he would be in the area was. It was the life of a StarFleet officer. It had its up and downs, but never knowing where you were going to be one day to the next took its toll on many things. Relationships were not something that were easy to maintain. He was now single once again, and it was starting to become a cycle. The only saving grace was the fact that Tressa was alive. With losing his first two loves to the Dominion War, it left him slightly jaded. He found himself unable to open up like he should. It seemed that in his recent past, he was only able to open up to other Betazoids. It was due to the fact he could not hide his feelings from them. It was also the reason he avoided returning home. He looked at himself as a man of strength and it bothered him to have moments of weakness.:: ::Finishing his drink, he kicked off his shoes and ditched the special attire. Laying down in the bed, he stared at the ceiling. After a few moments, he picked up the PADD and began looking for something to read that would keep his mind off of the way he was feeling. There were times he felt isolated among his crew. There were people he could talk to, but only about certain things. It was not the lack of accessibility, it was his lack of will. He was the captain of a starship, and felt he should not carry as much emotional baggage as he did. He worked hard to keep up the facade that everything was alright. He found himself burying his mind in work so that he could avoid thinking about where he was in life. For every success in his career, he had an equal failure in his personal life. One did not really affect the other, it was just a self observation.:: ::Tossing his PADD onto the nightstand, he pulled the blanket over him. After a few moments he felt restless, tossing and turning trying to find a comfortable position. He realized that the bed was just as comfortable as the command chair. There was something about new vessels that did not cater to comfortability. He kept his eyes closed, seeking a peaceful slumber. It took quite a bit of time, and countless rotations in his tossing and turning, but in the end he was finally able to fall asleep.:: ((Ready Room, USS Apollo - 0615)) ::Usually he liked to start the day earlier, but he had forgot to set an alarm. He found himself moving from the edge of the bed to the shower. Once he was completed with the cleansing ritual, he put on the uniform that was waiting for him. He finished his morning routine of brushing his hair and teeth, and found his way out to the office. Replicating a cup of vreeca, he moved toward the desk. He opened the latest operations reports and was not surprised to find nothing new. He had only fallen asleep a few hours prior. It was an increasing problem for him. He found it harder and harder to fall asleep. It was the worst it had been since his coma a few years ago. He had not noticed any issues with his telepathic control, so he considered it an isolated incident. Had he not been the CO, he would have visited Sickbay to see if something was wrong. In his mind it would be admitting he had a weakness, or illness of some sort. He had no ambition of dealing with tests and scans from any of the medical staff. He trusted their skills, but was the type to only go to Sickbay when he absolutely had a good reason.:: ::He continued to sit at his desk reading anything new that he had not laid eyes on. There was a good amount of information on the Klingons, and even some reports on Romulan movements. Since Romulus was destroyed, the Romulans kept having increasingly difficult times trying to reform. There were too many people seeking power, and the Empire was divided. He feared that the Klingons would use this as a reason to capitalize on the situation. He pressed a few buttons on the console and waited for the computer to chirp before speaking.:: Jaxx: Personal Log, Stardate 238908.07. We finished locating and transferring the survivors from the Nelson. I have made the recommendation that StarFleet dispatch another vessel to the area for an extensive search. There were still escape pods that were unaccounted for. ::sighing:: Tressa is gone now, she and the kids transferred over to the Carpathia to hitch a ride to DS5. From there, they will be leaving on a transport for her next assignment. Having her base-side will be good for the kids. Honestly, I do not know what to think. I wish I could forget, and take away my regrets. If we could've started again, would it have changed the end? I do not believe in fate, I never have. I think that where you end up is a victim of circumstance and your choices along the road. ::scoffs:: Maybe I should avoid non-telepaths. It seems every time I do, it ends badly. Why am I so closed off? I swear by the deities, I have known me, my entire life...I have a doctorate in psychology, I have been a counselor...and I am still a mystery to myself. How can I expect anyone to "get me" if I cannot get myself? The only thing I seem to do right is perform my duties. Do I pour so much of myself into it, I am bound to fail at anything else? ::snickering as he shook his head in frustration:: They say "ask the questions" for that is the only way you can seek answers. I have been asking these same questions for years, yet here I am...still asking. I just...I do not know. End log. ::As the computer chirped once more, he rubbed his face and cupped his hands behind his head and leaned back. There were so many questions he had, and could not find answers for. He had no desire to see the counselor, or receive the cookie cutter treatment it would involve. It would have helped if Jaxx did not spend any time in the field. He had the same ability to ask the questions and give insight into the situation, but for him it did not help repair the feelings. Life was a compromise of happiness and unhappiness, he just wished they would find a better balance. Why did one have to be in his professional life, leaving nothing but unhappiness for his personal one? He sighed deeply and turned to the crew files. He had a 0800 meeting with a few officers, and it was time to get his mind in the game. He thought of each of the ones he had seen the night before. Just as a precaution, he sent Ra-Uleyra a message in case Viktor forgot to relay it. Once that was complete, he sat alone in silence waiting for the day to officially begin.:: TBC Captain Andrus Jaxx Commanding Officer USS Apollo, NCC-71669 Captains Council Magistrate
  11. Congratulations Commander Tan. Great story, I really hoped it will win Ongoing Worlds competition.
  12. Welcome to all, congratulations on your graduation and good luck in your travels!
  13. (( Deck 5, Holodeck 3, USS Apollo)) :: Vik stood in the center of the room, looking at all the projection arrays and lifelessness of the room. It had always fascinated him how such a place could instantly be transformed into anything you could set your mind's eye on. He was wearing the preferred off-duty garb; a black wool pea-coat, a thin henley-style black undershirt and a pair of faded jeans. they were probably the only articles of clothing he had left from his time on Earth. His wardrobe mostly consisted of uniforms and the occaisional black suit for espionage. Non of that here tonight. :: :: He took the photo-file he was holding and opened it. It was the original electronic version that his father had given him right after the family split apart. He always told him to hang onto what he had left. Vik had looked through it from time to time, usually when he was thinking of his mother. He'd only been through a small portion of the videos stored inside, mostly because of the pain he felt; the pain of never being able to have those memories again. The smell of the faded metal enveloped him as he took off the leather casing. It wasn't very often he took this thing out of the leather, for he never knew what atrocity or accident might be waiting to take those memories from him. He closed his eyes and savored the moment. The very first picture was a picture of him and his mother standing in the kitchen. He pushed the button on the bottom signaling the book to play the video. :: :: He never remebered being that short or frail, or even the idea of baking in the kitchen with his mother. He smiled at the thought of who was behind the camera, and what it meant at the time. His father was capturing some important parts of Vik's childhood for him to remember always. Young Vik would stand up on his tip-toes and poke his finger in to the dough, with his mother turning to scold him. He laughed slightly with a broad smile on his face. He looked up and to the console by the door. He walked over briskly and connected the photo-file to the port. :: Lanius: Computer, run a file scan on the input I've supplied. render all points exactly as they are interpreted. Computer: Processing request, stand by... :: The room lit up all at once. The first thing to change was the smell in the room. Instantly he could smell bread baking. It was always one of his mother's favorite things to make, not to mention the most practical of all things. His mother appeared, along with the pint-sized Viktor standing right by her side. the fresh oak cabinets, the sun outside rising through the window, the table and chairs with the permanent coffee rings where his father once sat. It was all there. Even the breeze blowing through the open porch door could be felt, the same warm all-encompassing blanket that caught him every morning. It was real. :: Lanius: Computer... :: he paused for a moment biting his lip :: begin playback... :: The computer chirped and the action began. He was curious to this experience, as it was one that he didn't remember. It was something that his father recorded for him and his wife to recount after years of marriage. He didn't count on having to give it to his son to remember them by. The breeze could finally be heard, the door creaking as it shifted back and forth. His mother began to knead the dough in front of her, with pint-sized Viktor moving in for the kill. The finger made it to its target, as did his mother's :: Mary Ann: VIKTOR FAELRUN! How many times must I repeat myself, lord knows I'm soundin' like a broken record by now... :: Her irish accent was thick, just the way he remembered it. The computer had done a mint job in translating the audio feeds into reality. Little Lanius just looked as his mother and smiled a devlish little look. Vik couldn't help but laugh out loud, knowing that even though he didn't remeber this moment in time, it didn't surprise him at all. She turned to him and picked him up and set him on the counter. :: Mary Ann: D' you know what I'm bakin' boy? Any ideas? Little Lanius: No ma, none t'all. Mary Ann: This is your fadder's favorite... Friendship bread. And so it goes, dat whoever ya share it wit will be with ya forever. :: She offered him a piece of a finished loaf. :: :: He watched as the boy took the piece of bead and looked at it. He broke a smaller piece of it off and ate the other. He quickly hopped off the table and ran to the other side of the room, undoubtedly where his dad would have been standing. He knew that that little boy truly believed in what his mother had told him, and he knew exactly who he wanted to give that piece to. He just looked blankly for a moment at the small boy in front of him; the look of joy on his face, the sheer excitement of being able to share a family tradition with someone he loved. Vik closed his eyes as he felt the water welling. He bit his tongue striking away the urge to let loose. :: Lanius: Computer... Move to the last file... explain. Computer: Accessing. File contains verbal data stream, author, Faelrun Lanius III. Lanius: Generate male author, use files contained in the input I've provided. Use this model for playback of the audio. :: He knew it wouldn't be the same as hearing it straight from the old man's mouth, but it would have to do. He wasn't quite sure what he would be watching in the next few minutes, but in his mind, it was propbably something he needed to hear. He'd been avoiding that portion of video for long, long time. :: Computer: Acknowledged... *chirp chirp* :: At once the room turned black and a single light could be seen shing from ceiling to floor. Within the confines of the light the image of his father had appeared. The man was roughly 6'3 and of average build. The characteristic cleft graced his forehead signaling his lineage. His hair was still that jet black, and Viktor recognized him to be in his late 40's. He'd recorded this right after the splitting of the family. His face was expressionless as he seemed to stare right into Vik's eyes. He couldn't look away, not for a second. He hadn't seen the man since the happening. It was almost as if he simply vanished, never to be seen or heard from again. :: Lanius: Dad? :: The figure didn't move, or speak. He stood silent and stoic in a room of darkness. He wondered if the image created by the computer wasn't just some recreation of Viktor himself. He brought himself back center and remebered he was looking at an empty hologram, nothing more. :: Lanius: :: he said in an almost whisper like tone :: Computer... Begin playback... Faelrun: === Boy... I know that there's gonna be some things that I'm not gonna be able to explain to ya... Some hard things that, you wouldn't understand. Your mother and I... We both love you very much, don't ya doubt that for a second. It's just that, you're mother and I split for some reasons that I'm not proud of. Some things I did when I was away. I told ya both it was business... :: The man looked at the ground now. The computer had rendered what emotion it could into the hologram :: I'm sorry for being such a scoundrel son... Boy... the truth of the matter is that I wasn't faithful. I met someone in Dublin. We'd been seeing each other for quite a few months... The day I left is the day I told yer ma. I love you boy... I do. :: The tears were welling in his father's eyes, and Viktor's :: I just wish I could have been around to see you grow up, to see you in your uniform and to hold you tight on your graduation day. To be able to see your future family, your wife, your kids... I threw all of that away on account of a lust that lasted a few months. Don't hate me boy... I guess, what I'm telling ye... is don't be a hard callous man like myself. Don't throw it all away, when it's right there in front of ya...=== Lanius: Freeze program... :: He was crying now, standing there in the holodeck with his holographic father. It wasn't the words that had hurt him the most. It was the realization of just how much he'd lost by trying to understand his father. He'd turned into the man without ever realizing it. He began to feel the sadness slowly slip away and become replaced by anger. It was true, he was angry at his father for what he'd done. But now more than ever he was angry for taking his character from him and replacing it with his own. He instantly felt a rage take over, and he lashed out throwing a punch straight through the hologram and into nothing. He fell to the floor on his knees and collected his face in his hands. He began to scream into his hands. He jumped up and turned to the image :: Lanius: YOU KILLED US! YOU TOOK EVERYTHING FROM US YOU OLD WRETCH! AND WHAT ARE WE LEFT WITH.... :: he was breathing heavy as he spoke :: Nothing but shadows and dust... :: He sat now on the floor of the holodeck. oO Was it worth it? All of this? Oo. He thought about it intensely, about how this would affect him for the rest of his life. The man that he thought he knew to be one of chivalrous intentions, who taught him about how important family was, and how at no cost should it be broken up. And to learn that the polar opposite was true of him, it made the last 7 years of searching for the real reason seem like a huge void that could never be filled. He decided right then and there on the floor of the holodeck aboard the USS Apollo, that no longer would he be living in the shadow of the father he could have had. Instead, this was his time. :: :: This was the time to learn who he was, not his father. He knew the truth, and because of that, he no longer had to live in the dark. And to think that a trip to memory lane was sparked by a simple dinner in C39, amongst all the madness that had just ensued, it made Vik smile. He wiped the tears from his eyes and stood once more. he turned back to the image of his father. :: Lanius: And sometimes from the dust rises the courage to carry on... And carry on I shall... :: He turned and gathered the photo-file putting it back into it's leather case. he grasped it tightly for a second, and slipped it back into his coat pocket. He turned to his father once more, and with a smile spoke :: Lanius: Computer... End program... -- Lieutenant JG Viktor Lanius Intelligence Officer USS Apollo, NCC-71669
  14. Updated the rules with some stuff from the old Top Sims Contest page on our site that no longer exists -- one of the rules is that sims must not be older than a month. So, when a ship has been decommissioned in the last month, then yes, you can submit the sim. However, you can't go digging through the archives Considering this response. I completely agree with you. But it is not easy to remove poll option, especially if it's double poll like this one and it has votes. That there was an option to post it in round 14 I would chose it, but that option is still missing. I want to post Vik's "The Truth Hurts" but can post it in Rounds 1-13.
  15. I'm trying to post new sim, but in drop down menu there is no Round 14.
  16. Sims should not be considered for the contest unless they are complete and without open tags. So by that rule, this sim was finished with the response to it which was posted after the end of Round 13 and should be moved to Round 14.
  17. Here's another question for discussion. Fixed. Last 4 posted sims are Round 13 by the calendar: Lt Commander Ben Walker - Moving On; Rick Rawden & Gypsy Hawker: Are We Going To Be Alright ?; Lt. LtCmdrs Isaac Green and Jaxon Mc Ghee *Unexpected Events* and Lt. Jg T'Mhin: Moments. When I posted this two corrections, I was always checking the dates the sims were posted in their respectful groups, not just the dates of their submittal here on Forum. But what is right thing to do if it's the end of the submittal period and you don't have responses to the tags for the sim you want to submit? Is it more logical for that sim to be submitted to next round (since the response arrived during next round), or should we post sim with open tags and add responses resubmitting the sim later on with all of those filled?
  18. It's actually questionable. Original sim, "Serendipity" was posted to groups 21st. I couldn't post it here before, because response from Ra was posted yesterday. I forgot to ask what is the procedure in that case.
  19. ((Bridge, USS Apollo)) Ra: Lieutenant, do you believe that there is a destiny coefficient on the probability of outcomes? ::The question was quite random, but it caused her to pause and think about it. Was there a such thing as fate? As destiny? Certainly things had come together in her world to culminate at this particular point and time. Why could the same not be true for others?:: Adyr: You mean like, fate? ::He elaborated on the thought as if he’d been thinking about it, mulling it over in his head for some time.:: Ra: What I mean is do you believe that destiny, at times, is the driver of where we are supposed to be? As if some force, some say the universe, is somehow affecting us. Or is it all just coincidence and random chance? ::Alaryc had an interesting view on fate and history, and as his words came to mind, she smiled.:: Adyr: Someone once told me that half of everything is luck, but the other have is the unending need for the universe to balance itself. Perhaps we are part of that balancing process. ::It didn’t seem so easy for the man to agree. He seemed to voice a kind of internal conflict; a conflict that reminded her of days that had long passed.:: Ra: I grapple with the problem of lacking proof. I have never believed in predestination of any kind. I have always believed that we controlled our own futures. I once wrote a paper concluding that even if you traveled into the future to see the future outcome, there was no guarantee of achieving that outcome because of your knowledge of those future events. But throughout this mission, my beliefs have been tested. Your presence on this ship and coming up with the correct solution. The insights from Gondor. I wonder sometimes if someone is writing the script for us. So now if I am wrong, no matter what we do, we end up where we are supposed to be. ::Cayden contemplated that notion for a moment. It seemed like a fairly black and white conflict; either they were set on one path as a puppet that simply played a part in an already predestined play, or they were simply children of chaos who went and did as they wished without any real direction. Neither set seemed to fit her own beliefs on the subject though. Perhaps there was more than just the black and white.:: Adyr: Personally, I think it all falls into more of a grey area. ::Again she smiled and turned in the chair slightly to look at the Efrosian man.:: Ra: So, how does this blend work? ::Now it was her turn to elaborate.:: Adyr: Perhaps the script is not yet written because there are still possibilities. Paths if you will. We can choose the path, which ultimately will take us places and through experiences, and while we think this is where we need to be and when we need to be here, perhaps it is just the universe bending those paths towards balance. Ra: So you suggest that we all have our own final destination, but that the paths to reach that destination are ultimately up to ourselves. The universe does not concern itself with the finer details, but merely overall vision. Interesting... Adyr: Maybe there are multiple places and times where we should be. Where we can do the most good. ::Now she shrugged. Thinking about her own situation, she realized that here and now was where she wanted to be with her whole heart, but was that destiny, or was that simply the successful culmination of good choices she had made along the way? In times where coincidence and serendipity seemed to reside, it seemed far more like fate than it did of her own work.:: Ra: Yet it seems that certain events appear to be so well thought out that we end up where we are supposed to be, without option. Adyr: You’re right; strange coincidences seem to point towards some kind of predestined point in the future, but maybe we’re looking at it wrong. Maybe it’s just that our past dictates the paths we choose to take, and perhaps that is what puts us where we need to be. Ra: Historical analysis is often the best way to predict the future, however there are exceptions. Case in point, the Dominion War. Starfleet strategists predicted that it was more likely that the Federation was going to lose the war than win it. However, two unexpected events occurred. It was not expected that the Romulans would join the alliance nor the Cardassians to turn on the Founders...or that I would lose my older brother in that very conflict. ::It was an interesting way to turn it around on herself. She could feel Alaryc’s scientific mind tugging at her consciousness as she spoke. Still seeming no closer to the truth, she simply found herself content to mull over the options and thoughts of her now fellow officer. Strange was the road that had brought her back to this, the center chair, but regardless of if it was her or the universe, she knew that she wouldn’t have traded it for anything.:: TAG/TBC --- Lieutenant Cayden Adyr Mission Specialist/Command Advisor USS Apollo
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