JP Hamsan Dwich & Meidra Sirin — Tea

[Genkos Adea]

OOC - for those of us who've followed the Tale of Two @Meidra Sirins, this was a delight. And even if you haven't there's a lot here to enjoy; @Yalu also deserving of praise!

(( Ship’s Library, Deck 2, USS Resolution ))

Gertrude Kettleworth, MLS, had very little shushing to do, as Meidra and Dwich sat at a small corner reading table, saying nothing.  They had agreed to meet and discuss their relationship, and each of them came with something they wanted to get off their chest.  Now, everything was out in the open, and they remained together, hands intertwined in the center of the table, waiting for the other to say something.  Finally, it was Dwich who broke the silence.

Hamsan:  Thank you for telling me this.

The words felt empty coming out of Dwich’s mouth.  “Thank you?”  Meidra had shared with him a terrible secret, something he could never have guessed in a million years, and his heart broke for her.  “Thank you” seemed so insufficient.  An insignificant, polite formality.  And yet, it was all he could think of to say.  For her part, she seemed to accept it in the spirit in which it was intended, which made him feel so much better.

Sirin:  Thank you for being understanding about it. I felt like I was lying to you about myself, and that is not something that I wanted to continue doing.

Dwich nodded.  Indeed, the “two Meidras” had perplexed him over the course of their growing relationship.  Now, it all made sense.

Hamsan:  I can’t imagine how difficult it has been for you.  How lonely you must have felt carrying this secret.

Sirin:  I’ve spent most of my life feeling lonely, I suppose it’s been hard for me to realize that I’m not alone anymore. ::beat:: I haven’t been very fair to you, and for that I apologize.

Dwich wasn’t looking for an apology, nor did he feel that Meidra had anything to apologise for.  Relationships were difficult under even the most favourable of circumstances.  Meidra was dealing with a very painful truth from her past, while Dwich was struggling to define his future.  As Liri Ketel, one of Bajor’s lesser-known and least artful prophesiers so ineloquently wrote: “When you have one foot in yesterday, and one foot in tomorrow, you’re [...]in’ on today.”

Hamsan:  I guess it’s all just part of the path the Prophets have laid out for us.

Meidra sipped the iced tea, feeling a bit foolish. She’d never been a particularly religious person, as Vulcans focused on the here and now instead of a future that logically, they could not see. And El Aurians, well. They only seemed to believe in themselves to the detriment of other relationships. To love someone who had such a strong sense of their place in the world was quite precious.

Sirin: I think that I learn more about who I can be, every day that we are together. 

Hamsan:  I understand.  You were betrayed by the group of people in the universe you should be able to trust the most.  No one, not a Vulcan, not an El-Aurian, not a Bajoran, would so easily trust after being treated that way.

Sirin: Learning how to let people in hasn’t been easy. But it has been worth it in many ways. There will always be times where I am not as...open...as I wish to be with you, but it will never be because I doubt how you feel. 

Dwich exhaled in a not-quite-laugh, not-quite-sigh.  His mixed emotions were on full display.

Hamsan:  ::grins::  My turn now?

Sirin: ::nods:: Of course.

When Dwich told Meidra that his lifelong vocation was just as strong as it always had been, he too felt as though he’d been leading a double life, the “two Dwiches,” to complement the “two Meidras.”  It felt good to get it off of his chest, but it was a potential complication to a long-term relationship.  People become ranjens and prylars and vedeks because they want to serve the Prophets, to put them before any and all worldly concerns.  Such a commitment wasn’t ideal for making a relationship work.

Hamsan:  I’m sorry.  I should have told you sooner.  The truth is, I can’t help feeling that my pagh is still meant to walk this path.  That someday, I will join the clergy like I always wanted.  ::beat::  I didn’t expect to fall in love with you, though.

Sirin:  I didn’t expect to fall in love with anyone. But I would never hold you back from what you feel you need to do with your life.

Hamsan:  You’re an important part of my life now.  I can’t imagine it without you.  ::beat::  But that doesn’t replace or diminish what I still believe is my life’s calling.  I hope you understand.

Sirin:  ::pauses:: How do you see your life after StarFleet? How would you even begin to know how to transition into such a life? ::pauses:: How would I?

Hamsan: My four-year tour of duty is up next year.  I could always sign on again, but…

His voice trailed off.  Starfleet had given him so much, and it seemed less than grateful to cash out after everything the organization had invested in him as a medical technician.

Hamsan:  I have made some inquiries.  There are monasteries and temples all over the Federation now.  It’s not like I would have to hide away in some forest in the middle of nowhere on Bajor.

Sirin: ::squeezes his hands:: You know that I only joined because I had no one I could trust except my cousin, and she trusted StarFleet. Slowly, this crew has become my family ::smirks:: even Genkos. But even though I am grateful for their acceptance, and their companionship, I can’t imagine my life without you either. 

She took a deep breath and stared at him, focusing on his emotions. As an empath, she had always felt things so strongly that she’d forced herself to block emotions from everyone around her. This time, this once, she’d indulge and feel everything from someone else’s perspective. The rush of love and strength surrounded her like a blanket and she smiled brightly. 

Sirin: As long as you can feel as you do now about our joined path, I’ll walk it with you. However, if you ever feel that you need to walk alone, I - won’t be happy, but I will try to be happy for you. Because I do love you. 

Hamsan: I love you too.  And still I want to share more of my life with you.

The counselor considered this. What was the next step? Biting her lower lip, she acknowledged that they needed to have a conversation with someone a bit higher up then they were. 

Sirin: We’ll need to speak to Commander MacKenzie.

 

TBC

 

PNPC C2 Hamsan Dwich
Emergency Medical Technician
USS Resolution NCC-78145

simmed by

Lieutenant Yogan Yalu
Helm Officer
USS Resolution NCC-78145

Justin
D238804DS0

and

Lt Meidra Sirin
Counseling Officer
USS Resolution
R239707MS0