round 9 LtJG Zinna: Do I Really Know Me?

[FltCapt. Sidney Riley]

((Lathu's Quarters, USS Tiger-A))

:: At first Zinna was a bit scared. Why? Because what if she'd prove Velana right? What if she proved that she wasn't capable of helping Lathu. T'Mihn had told her that if she couldn't help Lathu then she wouldn't be the chief counselor in the first place, and she was right. Surely Captain Riley had faith in her or she wouldn't hold that position. Zinna then consider becoming a security officer if she failed Lathu. That would give her a chance to use her telepathy to solve crimes and interrogate people and be a lie detector and basically be a forensic scientist. As a counselor she felt restricted and confined sometimes. Zinna felt as if she wasn't nearly as important as the rest of the officers. If she'd said that to someone they'd call it nonsense and probably reply, "you're the one that keeps us together and focus. Without you we'd all be crazy and sad and unable to work properly. But that was the thing...did they really *need* her? Most people preferred talking out their problems with their friends, so was Zinna really helpful. ::

:: She had enrolled and took the major of counseling because her friends had told her it was perfect for her. She was from the race of "listeners" and that's what counselors needed to be able to do: listen. But was Zinna a listener? or did she just tell people what she thought was best? But that was what counselors were supposed to do right? They were supposed to give suggestions, but also listen. They weren't there to lecture their patients. Zinna always tried not to lecture people because she despised being lectured. Now she asked herself if she was being a good counselor. She had had hardly any real sessions. Now that she thought about it, she hadn't given any psyche evaluations in a long time. It seemed like every time she tried to offer listening to someone, they refused with some excuse that basically stated: "I'm more busy with this than worrying about my mental healthy." They had always been able weasel their way out of talking to her. So the question was.....::

Zinna: oO Am I so bored that I have to fight to get someone to talk to me so I can do my job. Is that how useless I am? Oo

:: She sat in a chair that she had replicated in Lathu's quarters. She had a smile that gave the Suliban encouragement, but she didn't know if it was working or not. She didn't know if he could tell her true emotions. Zinna had said she could take care of herself, but was that true, or was she just trying to act tougher in front of Velana and Lt. Beaufytor? But why would she need to impress them? What did they have that she wanted? *Happiness?* ::

Zinna: Hi Lathu.

Lathu: What's up counselor?

Zinna: How do you feel about finally getting out of sickbay and being in your room?

Lathu: Like the luckiest man in the world. Do you know how awful it is in there?

Zinna: ::jokingly:: Oh...I think I have a picture of it, ha ha.

:: Lathu looked at her with curiosity and scratched his head. ::

Lathu: Why do you want to talk to me?

Zinna: Because I'm a counselor, and that's what I do. But I'd rather listen. oO Yes, listen, that's what I need to do. Oo So go ahead. I think someone whose been through all the things you have, you'd want to pour out some of those feelings. Now if you don't mind, I'd like for you to start from the very beginning. Please.

:: Lathu sighed for a moment. ::

Lathu: I started off being transferred to the Tiger because of "emotional stress". My CO seemed to think that I needed to get off a starbase and go on wild adventures and get some stress relief. This was after my...demotion to ensign.

Zinna: Do you think that was a reasonable punishment?

Lathu: I'd rather chew a yellow rotten toenail.

Zinna: Oh...well...that's an interesting punishment. Please continue.

Lathu: And then I met Ens. Vistain. She was really nice to me.

Zinna: So you're friends with her?

Lathu: Not anymore. ::sniff:: I nearly killed her.

Zinna: But I bet she still wants to be friends with you.

:: Zinna could feel the security officer outside the room with his phaser ready to stun Lathu if he would get violent. What would the engineer do to him? Would he jump up from the bed, replicate a rope, and choke her to death. Or would he beat her, like Fulian, her ex-husband, beat her in the past. Could Zinna *really* defend for herself. On earth, a zinna was a type of flower, and that's exactly what Zinna was, a flower. She was a froufrou like woman. She didn't like to get down and dirty. She had sworn an oath to never take a life again, not that she *would* try to kill Lathu, but what if he got violent with her and somehow defeated the security guard. She would call for backup of course, but there was always that short time she would have to calm Lathu down or try and restrain him. She wasn't a martial arts expert, but surely she could fire a phaser. ::

Lathu: Ens. Taylor hates me, counselor, what do I do about that.

Zinna: First tell me, what are your feelings towards Danielle?

Lathu: I like her, a lot. She's the only one that's really my friend.

Zinna: Are your feelings stronger towards her than Amber?

:: For a moment Lathu looked as if he didn't know how to answer it. He shed a tear and wiped his eye. Zinna felt sadness within in heart. She knew this was a hard question for him, but that's why she asked it. She needed something to work with. ::

Zinna: Lathu?--

Lathu: WHAT?!!!!

:: He voice was loud and forceful and it sent his quarters' door to open. The security guard looked at Zinna, who gave a him an expression to signify that it was okay. ::

Zinna: Stand down crewman. Lathu, please answer the question.

Lathu: ::he stood:: I love Amber! I LOVE HER!

Zinna: Are you sure? Or are you obsessed? Or lust?

Lathu: I LOVE AMBER WITH ALL MY MIGHT! YOU'LL NEVER TAKE HER AWAY FROM ME! I WON'T LET YOU! I'LL DIE FIGHTING BEFORE I LET YOU STEAL HER AWAY FROM ME!

:: The security guard raised his phaser, and Zinna didn't tell him to stand down, because veins were popping from Lathu's neck. He was getting angrier. ::

Zinna: Lathu, I don't want to steal her away from you, why would you think that?

Lathu: IT'S WHAT ALL YOU WANT TO DO! YOU, VELANA, TAYLOR, AND THAT CADET! WHY CAN'T YOU JUST LET US BE IN LOVE!!!!!!!!!

Zinna: Let's think about what you just said, Lathu. Are you certain Amber loves you back, or is that just your fantasy? There's a difference between something that IS true and something you WANT to be true, Lathu. Think very hard about that because I'm going to ask it again. Are you certain Amber loves you or is that just your fantasy?

:: He didn't answer at first because he slumped in his bed. ::

Lathu: I don't want to talk anymore.

Zinna: Are you sure, Lathu? I was only trying to---

Lathu: LEAVE ME ALONE!

:: Zinna stood to get ready to exit Lathu's quarters. ::

Zinna: Lathu, I know this is hard for you at first but the only way to get through this is to talk to me, so I can provide suggestions. I'd love to help you. I want to. If Amber doesn't love you, then you'll have to accept that. You can't force love.You may think you're the only one with love issues, but you're not. Thousands of people are, but they keep trying. And you shouldn't blame yourself for Danielle's injury. Although you may have been the cause of it because of carelessness, you did take the blame which was a brave thing to do. You just need to restart your life, Lathu. You need to be more happy...

Lathu: I'll start when you start.

Zinna: oO What's that supposed to mean? Oo What's that supposed to mean?

Lathu: You're telling me to be happy, but you can't even be happy yourself. Is that really being a good counselor? Being a hypocrite?

Zinna: Rest and get better, Lathu.

:: Zinna left the quarters and the security officer gave her a nod, whatever that meant. ::

Zinna: oO Goddess, what in heavens does he mean by that? Oo

:: As Zinna walked off, she could here Lathu singing "I'm Walking On Sunshine", but she didn't pay any attention. She was heading for the bridge now, for something new to do. To be useful and do some good besides run her mouth about not being able to do her job. She could do her job any time she liked, but she was just into impressing people and trying to be someone else. Who *was* she trying to be? Zinna was certainly different now. She was way different. She used to be tranquil. She walked and wondered what was different about her. What was she doing wrong. Where were her friends? Why wasn't she hanging out with officers off duty or on leave? Why was she so invisible? Why was she a mystical enigma feeling useless? She helped people or she thought she did. She was different from when she was an ensign. Had her pride as Lt. JG gone to her head? She didn't sing anymore. She didn't garden anymore. She didn't spend time with Taxo anymore. She didn't do anything besides get better at her job. She was trying to hard. Did Lathu know some dark secret about her that she didn't? ::

Zinna: oO He'll save it...and use it as blackmail...Oo He knows me better than I know my own self....

((OOC2: I will sim Zinna either on the bridge, sickbay, or in science labs next. Thanks))

T.B.C.

~~~~~~~~~~~

LtJG Zinna

Chief Counselor

USS Tiger-A

[T'Mihn]

Great job Erin. :-)