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[Round 3] "The Alamo"


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Posted

((Main barracks, 2nd floor, Starfleet Enlisted Induction Center, Starfleet Academy Extension Campus, Capitol City, Shinraka))

::Lt. Colonel Lloyd Roberts watched as Lt. Walker strode purposefully away. Turning to Llewelyn he observed...::

Roberts: Helluva XO you got there, Mac. Why don't you go a little easier on him?

Llewelyn: ::sighing:: You know you're the second Marine Colonel to give me that advice...

Roberts: Come on, Mac. A little hazing is one thing, but you are about to send that butter bar into some real $#!+... I mean "Slappy"?

Llewelyn: The kids got guts, no question there. But I gave him that name for a reason, Lloyd. Smart @$$ slapped the $#!+ out of me as I was trying to clear my head from a chemical exposure that made the ugliest grey you've ever seen look like a supermodel.

Roberts: Sounds like someone I used to know...

Llewelyn: Alright! Point taken. =/\=Open secure channel, all units...::the combadge tweeted:: This is Dragon...All personnel, take note, 2nd Left-tenant Walker's call sign has been redesignated Wyvrrn. Left-tenant Walker, Confirm redesignation...=/\=

Walker: Reply, sigh of relief, a generous swelling of pride, whatever...

Llewelyn: =/\=Copy that, Wyvrrn. Dragon out...=/\= ::turning to Lloyd:: Happy now?

Roberts: Was that so hard, you crusty SOB?

Llewelyn: If the Colonel is satisfied with the modification to my command style, perhaps we could discuss something else? My love life, perhaps?

Roberts: ::genuinely surprised:: You have one?

Llewelyn: There is being sarcastic, I was Lloyd...don't push it...

Roberts: ::regarding his old friend sympathetically:: No, really...I can see it in your face, there is someone isn't there...

Llewelyn: Let me guess, too soon right?

Roberts: Hey ::he said a little defensively:: I've been there buddy. It happens when and where you least expect it.

Llewelyn: You aren't going to let it go are you?

Roberts: Look Mac, we're not in the best position here. If you have someone or something motivating you to get through this Fubar situation, I think it might be good to take a minute and focus on what you've got to live for.

Llewelyn: Lloyd... A distracted Marine is a dead Marine, is it? And she is very...distracting. You have no idea how hard it is for me to focus worrying about her, worrying if I'm ever going to see her again. It's not that I don't care. I do.

Roberts: But does she know how much you care? For that matter do you?

Llewelyn: Since when did we switch roles and you become the counselor?

Roberts: Comes with the job... I counsel new boots all the time about life, love, comittment... and you are avoiding the question...

::Llewelyn took his electronic field glasses and studied the perimeter, detecting no movement for the time being...::

Llewelyn: It's complicated Lloyd... It's been a very bumpy ride, but I think we are coming to an understanding...

Roberts: You love her?

Llewelyn: Ieusu, Maire and all the Saints! There is intolerable you are, is it? Does it matter? In a few hours I'll most likely be dead the way things are going down here. Why speak of such things.

Roberts: Because they're important Mac! You know for as long as I've known you you've been a Type A anal retentive tough guy who is uncomfortable in his own skin because deep down you are afraid of bending even a little. It doesn't surprise me that you had so many problems getting along with the Regs. You are a warrior, not a diplomat... Hell, even when you were the administrator of the Rhondda Orbital Platform you had your underlings scared $#!+less of you because you were so rigid. The only thing that made you halfway tolerable was the love of your wife and children...

Llewelyn: ::angry:: What the @#%! Lloyd? Why do you have to bring them up?!

Roberts: Easy, L-T... I may be your friend, but don't forget your place...

Llewelyn: ::simmering:: My appologies, Sir... but if I'm such an intolerable [...] then why are you and I friends?

Roberts: We're friends because above all else you are loyal to a fault and despite your overcompensating tough guy persona, I know that you are an honorable man of deep feelings and honesty. But to be honest, you've grown cold, Mac. I've never seen you quite so angry and bitter.

Llewelyn: Losing your wife and kids can do that to you Lloyd... I would think that after losing Jon'ay, and then that disaster of a relationship you pursued with Madeleine Prior that [...]ed near got you courtsmartialed, you'd understand that...

Roberts: Touche'...::he looked at his old friend with compassion:: I guess I was just hoping that you'd found some happiness, Mac. We're war horses, you and I... but its a lonely existance, and your soul needs to feel... to know you are alive and not some cog in a machine...

Llewelyn: ::anger abating:: I'm sorry Lloyd... I appreciate it really, but to be honest I wasn't expecting to meet anyone like her again so soon...

Roberts: Like Em?

Llewelyn: Strong like Em... and with no fear of standing up to me, there is to be certain. This woman has a pair of the biggest and brassiest, let me tell you. And yes, I do have feelings for her, and you know what, they scare the hell out of me and make my head spin at the same time. She's not Em... and I know better than to compare them, but...

Roberts: Sounds like love to me...

Llewelyn: Just like that, is it? Just that simple? I don't know, Lloyd... I... don't want to rush it, you know? There is fighting it from getting out of control, I am, day and night and... I'm finding it hard to keep from admitting the fact that... yes, I'm falling for her...::quietly wrestling with his thoughts for several moments, his old friend sitting quietly not saying anything. Llewelyn blinked, he must have dust in his eye, because he found it watering and realized the truth that lay within his heart.:: Not falling... I've already fallen...[...] it! ::Llewelyn pounded the windowsill in frustration...Looking at his friend with a vulnerability few had ever witnessed, a lone tear coming down his face. Wiping it away disgustedly, he admitted.::Yes, I love her. And I've got to get back to her, Lloyd.

Roberts: If that's not motivation enough to get through this, I don't know what is, Marine...

TBC

1Lt.Llewelyn

CO "C" Company, 24th Starfleet Marine Regiment

"The Alamo"

Shinraka

Posted

I don't remember quite so much swearing in Star Trek!

Posted

Llewelyn is a Drama Queen, and as that written masterfully. You can love him or hate him. I choose to love him and mostly because of another similar character I hated on first encounter and it showed deepness and ability to care that I felt guilty for hating him in the beginning. And they are very much alike ("Dodger" from China Beach), so this is nice insight into another side of the Tough guy.

Besides, we’re not to judge writing style but quality of writing what is mostly forgotten in this competition and is diminishing its value greatly.

Posted

Thanks, Boby...um, though usually being called a drama "queen" would not be something I would be comfortable with, but I appreciate the spirit in which I believe it was offered...(all I will admit to is a little literary "cross dressing" in that my second major character is a female... ;) ). Also, I wasn't going to respond to the language critique, but I appreciate you "having my back" on that. Since the subject has been broached twice now, I will offer a small explanation. The Marines are a bit of an anachronism, or throwback to a more primative and less flowery way of doing things. As a former member of the military I can tell you that f-bombs are as common as periods at the ends of sentances and in fact are often used as punctuation themselves. Additionally, if you ever watch the BBC, the F word gets common play, provided its used as an adverb or adjective, but never in its four letter form, so... the fact that Llewelyn is descended from Welsh expatriate colonists, culturally he wouldn't consider the language to be anything to much bat an eye at, but 'nuff said about that...

Posted

Oh man, no, do differ drama and drag queen!

DEFINITIONS:

The term "drama queen," or less frequently, "drama king" is usually applied to someone with a demanding or overbearing personality who tends to overreact to seemingly minor incidents. A drama queen often views the world in absolutes, and only has two settings on her emotional control button; zero and ten.

A drag queen is a person who dresses, and usually acts, like a woman often for the purpose of entertaining or performing. There are many kinds of drag artists and they vary greatly from professionals who have starred in movies to people who just try it once. Drag queens also vary by class and culture and can vary even within the same city. Although many drag queens are presumed to be gay men or transgender people, there are drag artists of all genders and sexualities who do drag for various reasons.

Posted

Thank you for the definition, Boby...;), but my point was more with the word "queen", which has a bit of slang to it as well, though I think I can see where you got the whole idea based upon Llewelyn's personalilty not his sexual preference, which I can assure you is hopelessly hetero... And I really appreciate the kind words...

Posted

Exactly, Llewelyn is of those “loud people“, my character is afraid of. Personally I am, too. :(

Drag queens are quite rarely homosexual. While “straight” tend to characterize them as LGBT, LGBT society, tend to deny them same as hermaphrodites, due to the fact that their sexual orientation is not toward same sex! While I understand it for drag queens for hermaphrodites it sounds strange (for me) since every sex is “same“ sex for them, lol! But this is wrong place to discuss it so I’ll end it here.

Posted
Exactly, Llewelyn is of those “loud people“, my character is afraid of. Personally I am, too. :(

Drag queens are quite rarely homosexual. While “straight” tend to characterize them as LGBT, LGBT society, tend to deny them same as hermaphrodites, due to the fact that their sexual orientation is not toward same sex! While I understand it for drag queens for hermaphrodites it sounds strange (for me) since every sex is “same“ sex for them, lol! But this is wrong place to discuss it so I’ll end it here.

*whispering so as not to lose a fan* Thanks for the clarification... ;)

  • 2 months later...
Posted

((Main barracks, 2nd floor, Starfleet Enlisted Induction Center, Starfleet Academy Extension Campus, Capitol City, Shinraka))

::Lt. Colonel Lloyd Roberts watched as Lt. Walker strode purposefully away. Turning to Llewelyn he observed...::

Roberts: Helluva XO you got there, Mac. Why don't you go a little easier on him?

Llewelyn: ::sighing:: You know you're the second Marine Colonel to give me that advice...

Roberts: Come on, Mac. A little hazing is one thing, but you are about to send that butter bar into some real $#!+... I mean "Slappy"?

Llewelyn: The kids got guts, no question there. But I gave him that name for a reason, Lloyd. Smart @$$ slapped the $#!+ out of me as I was trying to clear my head from a chemical exposure that made the ugliest grey you've ever seen look like a supermodel.

Roberts: Sounds like someone I used to know...

Llewelyn: Alright! Point taken. =/\=Open secure channel, all units...::the combadge tweeted:: This is Dragon...All personnel, take note, 2nd Left-tenant Walker's call sign has been redesignated Wyvrrn. Left-tenant Walker, Confirm redesignation...=/\=

Walker: =/\= Confirmed, sir. =/\= ::He tried not to let the relief seep into his voice, or the suspicion that the Colonel might have had some influence on his dear CO. Though that would have had nothing to do with the new name chosen . . . if he recalled correctly, wyvrrns were considered a type of dragon, and with Llewelyn's call sign . . . ? Well, it was best not to read too much into these things.::

Llewelyn: =/\=Copy that, Wyvrrn. Dragon out...=/\= ::turning to Lloyd:: Happy now?

Roberts: Was that so hard, you crusty SOB?

Llewelyn: If the Colonel is satisfied with the modification to my command style, perhaps we could discuss something else? My love life, perhaps?

Roberts: ::genuinely surprised:: You have one?

Llewelyn: There is being sarcastic, I was Lloyd...don't push it...

Roberts: ::regarding his old friend sympathetically:: No, really...I can see it in your face, there is someone isn't there...

Llewelyn: Let me guess, too soon right?

Roberts: Hey ::he said a little defensively:: I've been there buddy. It happens when and where you least expect it.

Llewelyn: You aren't going to let it go are you?

Roberts: Look Mac, we're not in the best position here. If you have someone or something motivating you to get through this Fubar situation, I think it might be good to take a minute and focus on what you've got to live for.

Llewelyn: Lloyd... A distracted Marine is a dead Marine, is it? And she is very...distracting. You have no idea how hard it is for me to focus worrying about her, worrying if I'm ever going to see her again. It's not that I don't care. I do.

Roberts: But does she know how much you care? For that matter do you?

Llewelyn: Since when did we switch roles and you become the counselor?

Roberts: Comes with the job... I counsel new boots all the time about life, love, comittment... and you are avoiding the question...

::Llewelyn took his electronic field glasses and studied the perimeter, detecting no movement for the time being...::

Llewelyn: It's complicated Lloyd... It's been a very bumpy ride, but I think we are coming to an understanding...

Roberts: You love her?

Llewelyn: Ieusu, Maire and all the Saints! There is intolerable you are, is it? Does it matter? In a few hours I'll most likely be dead the way things are going down here. Why speak of such things.

Roberts: Because they're important Mac! You know for as long as I've known you you've been a Type A anal retentive tough guy who is uncomfortable in his own skin because deep down you are afraid of bending even a little. It doesn't surprise me that you had so many problems getting along with the Regs. You are a warrior, not a diplomat... Hell, even when you were the administrator of the Rhondda Orbital Platform you had your underlings scared $#!+less of you because you were so rigid. The only thing that made you halfway tolerable was the love of your wife and children...

Llewelyn: ::angry:: What the @#%! Lloyd? Why do you have to bring them up?!

Roberts: Easy, L-T... I may be your friend, but don't forget your place...

Llewelyn: ::simmering:: My appologies, Sir... but if I'm such an intolerable [...] then why are you and I friends?

Roberts: We're friends because above all else you are loyal to a fault and despite your overcompensating tough guy persona, I know that you are an honorable man of deep feelings and honesty. But to be honest, you've grown cold, Mac. I've never seen you quite so angry and bitter.

Llewelyn: Losing your wife and kids can do that to you Lloyd... I would think that after losing Jon'ay, and then that disaster of a relationship you pursued with Madeleine Prior that [...]ed near got you courtsmartialed, you'd understand that...

Roberts: Touche'...::he looked at his old friend with compassion:: I guess I was just hoping that you'd found some happiness, Mac. We're war horses, you and I... but its a lonely existance, and your soul needs to feel... to know you are alive and not some cog in a machine...

Llewelyn: ::anger abating:: I'm sorry Lloyd... I appreciate it really, but to be honest I wasn't expecting to meet anyone like her again so soon...

Roberts: Like Em?

Llewelyn: Strong like Em... and with no fear of standing up to me, there is to be certain. This woman has a pair of the biggest and brassiest, let me tell you. And yes, I do have feelings for her, and you know what, they scare the hell out of me and make my head spin at the same time. She's not Em... and I know better than to compare them, but...

Roberts: Sounds like love to me...

Llewelyn: Just like that, is it? Just that simple? I don't know, Lloyd... I... don't want to rush it, you know? There is fighting it from getting out of control, I am, day and night and... I'm finding it hard to keep from admitting the fact that... yes, I'm falling for her...::quietly wrestling with his thoughts for several moments, his old friend sitting quietly not saying anything. Llewelyn blinked, he must have dust in his eye, because he found it watering and realized the truth that lay within his heart.:: Not falling... I've already fallen...[...] it! ::Llewelyn pounded the windowsill in frustration...Looking at his friend with a vulnerability few had ever witnessed, a lone tear coming down his face. Wiping it away disgustedly, he admitted.::Yes, I love her. And I've got to get back to her, Lloyd.

Roberts: If that's not motivation enough to get through this, I don't know what is, Marine...

TBC

1Lt.Llewelyn

CO "C" Company, 24th Starfleet Marine Regiment

"The Alamo"

Shinraka

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