[Last Round 2008] Dreams

[Delinda Sharee]

( OOC - I'm sure you'll all assume anyway, but none of the PCs

mentioned here are anything but dream-forms, and their dialogue

should not be taken as indicative of their true player's motives. )

( Dreams )

A small transporter room, a smirking man behind the console, she

knows Sam Koveski, but younger, with shorter hair, a smile that hasn't

seen what he's seen now. She knows she's younger, too, feels her collar,

one solid pip, one hollow.

Ventu: Bring her aboard.

Koveski: Who?

Ventu: My mother.

Koveski: Your mother-?

But he taps the controls anyway, even as she looks over, asking, why,

why not, why not my mother? Humming on the pad, and she looks

around again. Not her mother, he's right, but a captain, dark hair,

dark eyes, intense eyes, and she has to look away, look away so she

doesn't see herself reflected though if they're so dark, how can they

reflect her? She's afraid.

Roberts: Aresee Ventu, what have you done?

Ventu: You were never here, Abby.

Roberts: What have you done?

She looks around to Sam, but he's not smirking, gone, replaced

by a different captain, one who belongs on the ship, Phoenix,

hands at her temples, squeezing, squeezing.

Phoenix: It's time for me to leave, Counselor.

She steps back, should be onto Abby's foot but isn't, Abby's gone,

too, like Sam. She feels her collar again, another pip, back at

lieutenant commander.

Ventu: But you've only just-

Phoenix: It's time for me to leave, so it's time for you to leave.

Phoenix's fingers on the keys, and Lily's gone in a flash that lasts

a moment. On her back, legs spread, sweaty and wailing even

though there isn't the pain, Ellie Hathaway above her knees, and

she squeezes Quinn's hand harder, only it isn't Quinn. Large, dark,

and she trusts him but what's he doing here, now, he should be

here, shouldn't be seeing me here like this, not now, why won't he

leave-

Rocar: You're a disappointment.

She tries to pull away from him, he won't let go and Hathaway won't

let her move.

Rocar: We can't keep you here. You're a disappointment, a liability.

Your son-

Ventu: My son?

Rocar smiles and lightens, shrinks, retracts and shifts into Sidney

Riley, who has newborn Rhys in her arms. Her son, her son in her

old captain's arms, who cares if she was one a doctor, let me have

my son, give me my son-

Riley: Do you want him? Reach for him.

She does, she tries, but Riley pulls him away, away from her reaches,

smiling all the while.

Riley: You're a disappointment.

She takes a step that changes everything. The Tiger's ready room,

dark and still smoky, Rhys is crying, Sidney bobbles him up and down,

comforts him but not his mother, pats him on the back with one hand

and tosses a PADD across her desk. Lily takes it, knows what it says

without reading, knows the etching's done for her already.

Ventu: All dead.

Riley: Life can rarely be called fair, Lily.

Ventu: But you- I- we could've done something-

Riley: No. ::beat:: You didn't do anything. You're a disappointment.

Ventu: Let me have my son.

Anassasi (os): Excuse me.

She turns from Riley, from her son in her arms, there's Anassasi,

arms crossed, angry, judgmental, brows spiky and pointed.

Anassasi: You should never have survived.

She points past Lily, past Sidney and Lily's son, out the window. The

Triumphant, a bare speck but Lily knows what it is, dodging around

a giant battleship. Mirrored in the window, a bridge she can't see,

Nick in the central chair, Quinn and Tal Tel-ar and Will Hart and

then a handful of flame out the window, the scene in it extinguished,

Anassasi and Riley fade away, and then Rhys, holding Rhys.

Rhys: My ship-

Ventu: My son-

Rhys: You're the reason I left, the reason it was decommissioned.

You called him Rhys, after me? What right did you have? He has

no business as my namesake. You have no business as one of my

officers.

She reaches for her son, her quiet son, but Rhys pulls him away.

Rhys: You're a disappointment.

He turns from her, with her son. She steps after him, following, but

the world inverts again and she's on her back, on the floor. Rhys

above her, Prox goggling behind.

Rhys: Leave her. She isn't strong enough.

And behind them, Anassasi.

Anassasi: You should have died there. Should have. Should have.

And behind them, Riley.

Riley: Life isn't fair. Never fair. I never wanted you.

And behind them, Phoenix.

Phoenix: It was my time to go. It's your time to go.

And behind them, a blaze of light, out of the light, more light, a

dark-haired woman she's seen once, Alana Devar.

Devar: Welcome to Devar Manor.

More details, and Lily sees the other counselors she met, Vetri,

Maria, Lee, Jaxx, and the ones she knew, knows, Sharee, Salen,

Phoenix. Scott, MacGowan, Delinda approaches, offers a glass

of champagne but Lily doesn't know if she wants it or not and

Delinda lets it fall, shatter on the courtyard floor.

Sharee: Ops doesn't need you.

Salen: Tiger doesn't need you.

Screams ahead, and she pushes past Par and Delinda. A large

alien, snakelike, nonhumanoid, has Vetri and Maria in a corner.

Vetri looks over with large eyes, asking, pleading, condemning.

She wants to help, I want to help, but why can't you move, why

can't you do it yourself, why can't I move and why can't we get away?

Vetri: How could you let this happen?

Lily tries to run, to stop the snake but nothing happens, she

watches as it slithers closer and then it stands, it has Vulcan

ears, a marine uniform.

Reed: Is this what you wanted?

And she spreads her arms wide and they're on the starbase,

watching through a window as a thousand Klingon warships

engage the Starfleet below her. Explosions, fire, and she has

her hand at her sternum.

Ventu: It was one night-

Reed: Your mistake. Your failure. The governor never had a chance.

Approaching from behind, Rocar, looming and shadowing over

Brunsig, a sneer, Rocar's eyes downturned, but Brunsig's look

reserved only for her, only the lowest.

Brunsig: A joke, that's you. First officer then, and you haven't

made it any farther. Who's the CO now, you fool?

Rocar: I expected much more. You are a disappointment, not

the Ventu I heard of. You will leave my base, immediately. I want

you to leave, immediately.

Ventu: But I- My husband-

Rocar: Immediately.

Hayden (os): Find your own way home.

The others darken and he approaches, her son's in one of his

arms, with the other, he pushes her hand away, reaches beneath

her collar, pulls away the necklace he gave her on their marriage

day. She reaches for it, for his hand, grabs at it because it isn't

his to take back, he gave it to her and I'll keep it, a gift and no

right of yours to take it back, what gives you the right now-

Hayden: My son. My son. I wasted my time with you.

She can't see him, can't watch them together, turns away and

becomes her house, her teenage room, her mother on the edge

of her bed.

Matilda: Lily, Lily, come to me.

She holds her mother close, leans into as much lap as she can

but finds it small, much too small and rapidly shrinking as she

grows and tries to hug her mother tighter but suddenly her

mother's dust and wind and she's kneeling in it, kneeling over

Quinn. An alien planet, a place she recognizes as Quinn breathes

for the last time and the lights behind her eyes fade, fade.

Ventu: No!

She pumps against Quinn's chest as the dust shuffles and

rises around her, forms in the dust, Anassasi and Riley again.

Anassasi: You've let her die.

Riley: I would have saved her.

Anassasi: You were acting first officer.

Riley: Their lives were your responsibility.

Anassasi: Her life was your responsibility.

Riley: You let her die.

Anassasi: You let her die.

Both: You've disappointed us.

But she can't hear them, can't pay them a moment when

Quinn's below her and she's bending over, balling her hands

into one large fist that she beats again and again, live, [...]

it, this isn't supposed to happen, you didn't die then and you

showed me other things and you can't die now, not now, not

when you haven't showed me-

Reynolds: This?

A shuttle [...]pit, Quinn alone in the chair, different than a

Starfleet shuttle, jeans for Quinn and a miniature greenhouse in

her arms, inside the greenhouse, Rhys, wailing, muted and silent.

Reynolds: You thought you could save me.

Ventu: ::firm:: I won't let you go.

Reynolds: You'd choose me?

Her entire body sends itself into the throw, the greenhouse sails

out the shuttle's window, vanishes into the black with Rhys, Lily

leaps up and covers the steps from her seat to the window but

it's solid for her, no way to follow and Quinn laughs, falls away

and suddenly Lily's on the floor, screaming, shot through and

again by a pain she doesn't feel but remembers well enough,

withdrawals. Away from the Borderlands, and Alexa appears just

out of her vision, staring down with her arms crossed, nostrils

flared, and she walks away as the shuttle darkens, a starship over

them, and a voice over the communication system.

Roberts: This is Commander Roberts of the Starship Galaxy.

Unidentified vessel you are ordered to- Lily?

A rapid shift. Daydan Taboo, in the Ten-Forward of the

Constitution, calling her forward to sing, warmth in his eyes,

in his voice, bowing away for her while still clapping-

Taboo: Lily.

Rhys Bejain, propped on his chair, painting his wall while he

walks over his shoulder. His voice, tired, old.

Rhys: Lily.

Sidney Riley, an assembly hall on Deep Space Seventeen, the

crew assembled to watch torpedo coffins two dozen strong,

Sidney turns to her and her hand on Lily's shoulder, a sad voice,

sad but blaming, your fault, your fault, my fault.

Riley: Lily.

Nick Parks, in bed next to her, young with shorter hair, touching

her temple, running her hair back, love against his tongue.

Parks: Lily.

She fixes to him, holding strong, refusing to let go and feels

him under her, never mind that it's a dream and she can't feel,

she feels him and she won't let it change, won't let herself fall

farther, even if it has to end, let it end so there isn't any more

and she can end it with him.

Lieutenant Commander Lily Ventu

Envoy

Starbase 118