Clase Drene

I can sufficiently say that I am getting on my nerves, I keep cleaning and fidgeting and it is really getting on my nerves I just now know why. I keep cleaning because I keep cleaning thereby my nerves are fried... so it just gets to me,,, any farther and there will be no telling what could happen, a clean apartment. that would be going to far ....

I can't help myself without helping someone else, Why?

I could not sleep so - I will let you know what I know - it is that the sounds that are guide the ones that can follow the sounds that are... the voice guide us thru the sky beyond light and dark into the higher planes of experience were existence is not real and reality has no existence as it is. we know ... this experience is now everywhere we all are.

I do not expect only act, I need not expect anything at all.. it is all action - this is a must... otherwise nothing ,,, not one thing will change.

I don't fight, I am not prowd, I have nothing to prove, the life I am in has purpose, so make it end quickly please....lays down to sleep forever (I don't even know what forever is)

i don't know why to post this stuff but... welll since no one knows how to read and or care usually it does not matter what I post yep so about the decision to stop the life support on Dad. a forum post conversation going on .. at a different corner of the net.Re: I'm checking in! Coffee and cookies edition!^ yes It it was finials week at Rutgers and I was taking 18.5 credits... Oh and as well had my first psychotic break from reality at the time because the voices in my head were too d...

I don't ride the roller coaster because it makes me sick. I think I have used up all the fun I am allowed, maybe,..

I don't want to wake up I just want to stay the same ... sleep is missing - need sleep ahhhhhahahahaha

i feel like two or three things more then now.what emotion is that.this thing is telling me to go home. so what.values and the qualities of the values there of are ridiculous,. again.

I guess I will have to bridge the gap between up and down on my own.. nice it is very nice.

I had a little "extra" time and I tried to save it for a rainy day but forgotten where I put it so now I have no time at all... and just so much to do that I am overwhelmed sorta. you understand.. but I am going to fight back and get all that time I saved for now.

I hate "then" and "than" two normal words that just don't get along.

I have a section 8 room in my 2 bedroom apartment, that is for rent, you would need to be put on my section 8.,, and approved by the landlord,,if I don't get someone I might have to move,..

I have change my mind no I will not post this.. sorta like yet but in time it gets put out there for no particular reason at all.

I have gone crazy but don't worry I have gone there before... same old same old.

I have Lost hope ... or at least given all my hope away and I don't care anymore Ganymede ...

I have lost hope, I have given up on maintaining my faith. And this is something I alone have the power to change, the trust of being aware of who I am is as pointless as not being aware at all,.. I no longer seek a path - or anything to take with me,.. Beyond 'my' willingness to be free is a lifeless dead end,.. And 'now' has lost the hope that I had trusted in for so long,,

I have lost hope. And there is nothing new there. right? I have lost the want, will and or need to live any kind of life further; it just does not work either insane and or sane it does not matter. my values in and of my hated selves are meaningless, what are there now left after I give up on life and by my surrender to a life i have never known, I know most people do not go to sleep thinking of suicide, I sorta figured that out, somehow. most people do not dread waking. and most people d...

I have mastered my fate and I control my soul with self manipulations of the grand soul of souls as That can manifest time as real... nothing is more real then realities within my mind and worlds of thought like the abacus above my bed as I look out my crib's window as a young one that knows nothing as invincible as life's end and beginning below me is just more, of the same. so what - ever I know is now known as forever and endless like being the victor between good and evil or ,,, not.

i have the 2000 world almanac is this a good thing to collect? or throw it out as old news..?

I have the fans on and am considering putting the air conditioning on again.. maybe.... it is so hot... I am losing my mind..

I imitate only the things left alive in hoping I might live a life other then my own.

I just decided to download all my youtube video onto a 2 terabyte drive... I am guessing they will keep the whole thing at youtube but now I will have copied everything...even if you don't read this your eyes will have looked at it so there is something to see.

I just found that meeting list from my first meeting... well second meeting the first meeting I thought I was going to find a party at but did not find anything to party with... hehe.. but then the second meeting in... April 1990 I got a meeting list with names and numbers from the Tuesday meeting at st peters. what ever happened to all those people on that list?

i just like fell out again, but, so what might as well change the tree that I am following now. can't let the tree run my life... or the mutant X chemical .. you know that there is a theory that life and death have no meaning so be it known ,,send help.. but how???? always are the same go now ... anyway is fine.. meh.