round 13 Sherana & Cmdr Tal Tel-ar: The heart wants

[Jalana]

((Corridor, USS Constitution-)

:: Tal walked quickly along the corridor, leaving the gathering in the aquatics lab behind. His mind was busy, deep in thought and he almost did not realize that he had slowed down and come to a halt in one of the small little cozy observation nooks that could be found just about anywhere on the ship. ::

:: He must have been standing there, staring out at the deep, dark depths of space for a while before he suddenly spoke. ::

Tel-ar: Computer open a communications channel to the USS Apollo-A, in care of a civilian names Sherana.

Computer: Voice identified, Cmdr. Tel-ar. Opening channel.

:: Tal continued to stand and stare off into the depths of space, waiting patiently for any results. His conversation with Lt. Cmdr. Rajel had sparked a number of memories. Sherana had been instrumental in his final recovery from the self-destructive mindset that had followed his divorce. Not only that but she had been…. Passionate, wild and maybe as much in need of someone as he had been. Their nights and days together had resulted in marathon sessions as both pushed themselves, trying to lose themselves in the pleasure of the flesh. ::

:: Tal had not tried to contact her once, after getting transferred off the USS Apollo-A. He had done the long distance relationship thing before and it had destroyed his marriage. Besides she deserved a man who could truly compliment her strengths and weaknesses. ::

:: Unfortunately that did not exactly describe Tal. He had not even realized his wife was unhappy or that she was slowly getting royally [...]ed at him. Their final explosive meeting before she resigned her commission and returned to earth with their kids had been truly inspiring. ::

:: Still he owed her and not just for helping him burn off the rage and stress, although that had been fantastic. No, he owed her for being a friend, for not pushing and accepting him as he was so if he could in anyway return the favour then he was going to try, even if he was probably the last person in the galaxy who should be trying. ::

Computer: Civilian citizen Sherana contacted. Channel open, proceed.


(( USS- Apollo-A, Quarters Sherana ))

:: Sherana, the rather unusual botanist of the Apollo-A, had just finished building the roof for her plants. A malfunction in the environmental systems had brought winter's frost to a small region of her Arboretum, which of course was not the part, that was not suitable for cold. Apparently there was a lot of work for Engineering right now, because none of the dozens of engineers could take care of it. Sherana had never been a technical mind, she was a warrior and a botanist, so she could not take care of it herself and in the end built a small construction to cover the trees and keep the frost from them. ::

:: When she entered her quarters she took off her tool belt and placed it on its place on the side table next to the door and pulled the band out of her hair, before shaking the soil out of it. Since she was alone now, she pulled the bulky sweater over her head and threw it onto the couch, while her feet dragged and pulled themselves out of her working boots. She rubbed over her face, it had been a long day, but she had done longer and more exhausting ones in the Klingon Military. Still she was looking forward to a quiet evening with some meditation. ::

:: Just when she was opening a drawer to get her candles, the console in the standard desk she had pushed into a far corner, beeped. ::

Computer: Icoming audio call from the USS Constitution B.

:: She pulled her brows together and wondered who would call her. Who did she knows on the Constitution? Could it be? No.. why would he? Despite the doubt, her heart skipped a beat. Only one way to find out. ::

Sherana: Accept call.

:: It was silent for a moment, but then there it was, the voice she had not heard for a felt eternity. ::

Tel-ar: =/\= Hello Sherana. =/\=

:: And the very first sound of it sent sensations through her being, she had not felt ever since he had left. It was true. Her blood sang of his memory. ::

Sherana: =/\= Tal. =/\= ::She was glad she did not sound like a whimpy little Earth woman, but still like herself. It did not matter that he did not see her, her posture, the dirt in her face, she still straightened her back, proud and tall. What did people say in these situations?:: =/\= What is new with you? =/\=

Tel-ar: =/\= Fleet Admiral Jaxx brought the USS Doyle-A and I have been transferred to it. =/\=

Sherana: =/\= I understand. It is a surprise to hear from you. =/\=

Tel-ar: =/\= Seeing him, seeing the others with him from the USS Apollo-A made me think of you. =/\=

:: She would lie, if she'd say she did not think of him. Just because she unterstood that duty came first, did not mean that she had not missed him near. She was just not some whiny little female begging for someone to stay close and pretend she could not live without someone. She was strong and had been raised with the credo of 'duty and honor first'. ::

Sherana: =/\= I thought of you too, Tal. =/\= ::She did not like that she could not look him into the eye, why did he use an audio connection? :: =/\= It is good of you to call. =/\=

Tel-ar: =/\= I was unsure if I should. You indicated that you did not expect it of me. =/\=

Sherana: =/\= You would not have wanted the distraction. =/\=

Tel-ar: =/\= What I wanted never came into it Sherana. You insisted remember. =/\=

Sherana: =/\= And you insisted that going is your duty, and I would not stand in the way of duty. You know me that well. And my duty is here. =/\=


((Observation Nook, USS Constitution-)

:: Tal stood staring out at the depths of space but that was not what he was seeing. No what he was seeing were memories, memories of intimate times and passionate meetings with a woman who still captivated his thoughts and stirred up powerful emotions just from the sound of her voice. ::

Tel-ar: =/\= What else could we do? =/\= :: Tal turned away from the view outside, his vision turned inwards seeing her, remembering her. ::

Sherana: ::A memory flashed back into her mind, surrounded by green, and in his blue arms.:: =/\= Your memory is faulty, Tal. I do remember requesting that you will keep me updated with your path. =/\=

Tel-ar: =/\= Yes you did. That is something I should have done before now. =/\= :: slight pause :: =/\= Just as we spoke of possibilities for us. =/\=

Sherana: =/\= Yes, I remember it. Right before our shaping of new memories in the Arboretum. =/\= ::Another shiver ran from head to toes, remembering how he had locked the place so they could have privacy.::

Tel-ar: =/\= Something never to be forgotten. At least by me Sherana. =/\= :: Tal knew his voice had changed when he spoke this time, a strange wistfulness, one almost of desire had slipped out. ::

Sherana: ::She crossed her arms in front of her chest, even though he could not see it, it was a natural reaction.:: =/\= Have you called me to fight, Tal? =/\=

Tel-ar: =/\= No. That was not my intent. Did you expect me to act so illogical? =/\= :: Tal pulled it together, forceing his voice to return to its normal, unemotional tone. ::

Sherana: =/\= I didn't think so. So tell me, how has life treated you? =/\=

Tel-ar: =/\= It has been interesting yet lacking. =/\=

Sherana: ::She raised her brows, even though he could not see it. :: =/\= Lacking of what? =/\=

Tel-ar: =/\= You.... If it was possible... =/\=

(( USS Apollo-A, Sherana's Quarters ))

::For a split second her heart jumped almost out of her chest. So he missed her? No matter how much Duty came first and how much she understood it, she was still a woman, behind her way too big men clothes. She swallowed and this time was glad he could not see her. She did not like appearing weak. ::

Sherana: =/\= Why... me? =/\=

Tel-ar: =/\= Because I can not forget what being with you is like. =/\= :: Tal could hear the change in his own voice again as he admitted to having a weakness, her. ::

Sherana: ::There it was again, his voice had changed and shivers ran down her spine. :: =/\= Why didn't you say that before? =/\=

Tel-ar: =/\= Because we are both essentially warriors, duty comes be four our hearts. =/\=

Sherana: ::That was right, they were. :: =/\= And if it were different? =/\=

Tel-ar: =/\= If it was otherwise I would wish we were together. =/\=

Sherana: :: The warmth that moved into her chest made her feel soft and gentle, something she was not used to. But it was for long enough to hear herself say:: =/\= Me too, Tal. =/\=

Tel-ar: =/\= Why? :: Tal hated speaking about how he felt about other people but even he realized that their were times when one had to do it no matter how he felt about it. :: Because I am not Klingon, human or even technically Andorian, Sherana. =/\=

Sherana: =/\= You are right, Tal. But you are you. You are a warrior, strong and honourable. ::She paused:: Why is this so difficult, Tal? =/\=

Tel-ar: =/\= Because as an old friend of mine use to say, the heart wants what it wants. =/\=

Sherana: ::Ah yes, his friend from the Academy, she remembered hearing about him before. What was his name again? Jason? Janos... something with J. Human names all sounded the same. :: =/\= And I know what mine wants, Tal. But you deserve more than someone who is across the galaxy. =/\=


((Observation Nook, USS Constitution-)

:: Tal no longer stood looking out at the depths of space. In fact his eyes were closed, his memories providing the image of Sherana, the Orion woman who had helped him recover from his self destructive tendencies, who had become more than just a friend. A woman who had been for a very short time his woman. ::

Tel-ar: =/\= Deserve and what I can have are two different things. =/\=

Sherana: =/\= And what do you think you deserve? =/\=

Tel-ar: =/\= To be able to fall asleep beside you and to wake up with you every day. =/\=

Sherana: =/\= Tal, I ... =/\=

:: She became quiet and Tal had no idea if his suggestion had offended her or if she felt the same. ::

Tel-ar: =/\= I know, an impossible dream. Your over 9 sectors away from here. It would take almost a month for me to reach you... still you asked. =/\=


(( USS Apollo-A, Sherana's Quarters ))

:: Sherana thought about that. It was a long distance, but even with that, right here and now, her feelings had not diminished one bit. She did not like that weakness, but at the same time just now relished the feelings he caused in her. ::

Sherana: =/\= What is distance... Don't tell me you miss me, Tal. =/\=

Tel-ar: =/\= I do not know. :: slight pause :: but yes I miss you. =/\= :: Tal could not believe that he was admitting to having any weakness, even if it was only his desire to be with her. ::

Sherana: =/\= Why? =/\=

Tel-ar: =/\= #$%^& Sherana. :: slight pause as Tal regains control of his emotions :: Your the best thing that ever happened to me. =/\= :: Tal looked around, hoping no one was close enough to have seen his outburst but at the same time not really caring if anyone had. ::

Sherana: =/\= And now, Tal? =/\=


((Observation Nook, USS Constitution-)

:: Tal no longer stood looking out at the depths of space. In fact his eyes were closed, his memories providing the image of Sherana, the Orion woman who had helped him recover from his self destructive tendencies, who had become more than just a friend. A woman who had been for a very short time his woman. ::

Tel-ar: =/\= I do not know. This is completely unknown territory for me. =/\= :: Tal admitted as he reached up with one hand and kneaded the muscles on his neck. ::

Sherana: =/\= But you were married before. =/\=

:: Her statement was a simple fact. One that was true and while Tal had loved his wife... the relationship had never been... solid. ::

Tel-ar: =/\= You are nothing like my ex-wife. You are so much more than she could have ever been. =/\= :: It was a reality that Tal had been forced to admit to himself. One he had been avoiding telling Sherana both out of fear and concern. Fear that she did not feel the same way about him and concern because regardless of how they might feel about each other the realities of their current positions might make it impossible for them to truly enjoy any kind of a real relationship together. ::

Sherana: =/\= I need to see you. =/\=

:: Tal felt a little thrill at that simple statement as his hands opened and closed unconsciously while he replied. ::

Tel-ar: =/\= That may be a little difficult right now Sherana. Your a long way away. =/\=

Sherana: =/\= I know that. Just turn on your camera. =/\=

:: So she wanted a visual, not to be in his presence, close enough that he could take her in his arms... still her request was logical, practical and he realized that he wanted to see her as well. As he did he started moving, his long legs taking him swiftly down the corridor at a full out run even as he replied to her. ::


((Corridor, USS Doyle))

Tel-ar: =/\= Give me a moment Sherana. =/\=

:: Tal slid to a stop and waited impatiently for the door to the lab to open. For a moment he almost reached out to help it but he was able to restraint himself as he slipped past the half open door and rushed over to the wall mounted screen, activating it as he did. ::

((Science Lab))

:: It took the computer a few seconds to catch up, transferring the signal and establishing a proper connection. Then the image on the screen changed and he could see Sherana. She looked to be sitting down on a chair in front of the terminal and based on the way she was dressed and what he could see behind her she was in her quarters. ::

:: She looked fantastic. Her loose hair framed her face and shoulders and she was wearing a sleeveless tank top that showed off her arms and curves. Seeing her like that, made his mind wander for a second. Remembering their last day together. She never dressed like that, always wearing overlarge bulky garments that concealed and hid just how truly feminine she was. ::

:: For a moment his heart seemed to stop in his chest as she suddenly reached out and touched the screen gingerly. Her face seemed to soften slightly, just like it did when she was in his arms. At that moment he would have given anything, even his commission to be there with her, to be able to take her in his arms and hold her close while he kissed her. It took the sound of her voice to break the illusion and return him to reality. ::


(( USS Apollo - Quarters Sherana ))

:: Sherana sat down on the chair in front of the terminal, the sleeve less tank showed her arms and her curves, something she usually covered under her bulky sweater, but he had seen more of her than anyone else, so she did not think of putting that sweater back on. Her loose hair framed her face and shoulders as she looked at the blue man's face and she felt that weakness again. Before she could stop herself, she had reached out and touched the screen gingerly. Her face softened slightly, thought she did not smile, she never did, not even for him. ::

Sherana: =/\= It is good to see you. =/\=

Tel-ar: =/\= I am glad that seeing me agrees with you Sherana, especially as seeing you has reminded me of just how truly beautiful you are. =/\=

Sherana: =/\= We are honest with each other and right now I hate that I feel this weakness in me, it is frustrating to be a weak warrior. =/\=

Tel-ar: =/\- Frustrating, weak.... =/\= :: Tal's left eye brow rose and fell as he considered her simple statement. ::

Sherana: =/\= But at the same time, it is the greatest feeling I had in a long time, a new and strange one. But it is good. You are special to me and the day I have met you... every day we have fought, and every moment in your arms.. =/\=

Tel-ar: =/\= I had thought I could live with out you, :: As he talked Tal's voice lost all of its normal unemotional tone and came alive with a rich, husky tone that was both masculine and dripping with desire. His face also relaxed, it was no longer a stone mask hiding his inner feelings. :: that I was strong enough to resist my heart, my desire. I realize now that I was a fool. That with out my knowing it you had become a part of me, as important to me as air or duty. :: Slight pause :: So I guess that leaves me with the question, do you want me as much as I need and want you? =/\=

:: Tal waited, unsure of what her response would be, desperately hoping that against all logic, that regardless of the impossibility of it all she might feel the same way he did. ::

:: That was the question. The big thing. What did she want to do? Did she want to be safe and miss out on the best that had ever happened to her, because the distance would make it difficult? Or would she dare it, be the woman she was, the warrior she was and fight for what she wanted. Her dark eyes dialed in on his. ::

Sherana: =/\= I want you. =/\=

:: Those three simple words meant more to him than anything he had ever done, than anything he had ever said. For a moment he wanted to throw back his head and scream out a cry of victory, instead he smiled, a small one true but one of pure happiness and joy as he replied back to her, asking the other question. Again one he hated to ask but knew he had to as it was the biggest hurdle preventing them from being together. ::

Tel-ar: =/\= And the fact that we are so far apart? =/\=

Sherana: =/\= No distance changes what I feel, it hasn't so far and it won't. =/\=

Tel-ar: =/\= I agree. Somehow we can make it work. =/\=

-----

Sherana
Botanist
USS Apollo-A

simmed by

LtCmdr Akeelah D'Sena
First Officer
USS Apollo-A
Image Team Facilitator

&

Commander Tal Tel-ar
Chief Security/Tactical Officer
USS Doyle