round 7 Lt.JG James & Lt. Cmdr T'Lea: Talk to me

[Lupo]

((Counseling Suite, Embassy))

:: There had been yet another emergency request for AJ’s presence at the counseling suite, though this time, it couldn't be Irina. AJ stepped into the waiting room to see T’Lea awaiting her. ::

James: T’Lea...step into my office, we can talk there.

:: Without a word the Vulcan hybrid rose from her seat and followed the Counselor inside.::

:: It was a short walk, one that T’Lea wasn’t looking forward to, but she managed to put one foot in front of the other, and repeatedly remind herself of why she was doing this.::

:: Step-by-step her answers were plain and clear. She was doing this for her family, and for herself. Because if there was any hope of returning to some kind of normalcy, it had to be done, and it had to start here.::

((Counselor's Office, Embassy))

:: AJ sat at the desk and offered the chair in front of it to T’Lea. ::

James: I’m only passingly familiar with what happened, so lets start with what you remember.

:: The redhead went straight to the point. There would be no worming around the objective of this meeting. Not that T’Lea wanted to weasel out of it. In fact, this was possibly the first time in her life that she actually *wanted* to be sitting is this chair.::

T’Lea: ::sighing:: Right… all right… let’s see…

:: While the Counselor had given her the perfect opening to get the ball rolling, T’Lea found herself fumbling with how, and where exactly to start talking about the touchy subject.::

:: Then it came, one difficult, painful word at a time.::

:: Her voice may have been evenly controlled, and the events may have been delivered in a logical narrative, but the hybrid’s eyes gave up her emotions.::

:: There was anger. A *lot* of anger, but there was also an unhealthy amount of guilt and fear.::

:: She spoke of the illegal cybernetic implants, how they were meant to correct a flaw in herself (her marksmanship skills, or lack thereof), how they were supposed to make her better, how they were going to keep her family safe, and finally how they were used against her.::

:: She talked about the malicious program that had been unleashed in her cybernetic system, and how it had turned her into an assassin sent to kill her own family, and anyone that got in her way -- how Dal Selta had turned her into the very thing she was trying to protect her family from.::

:: Then she described what the program made her do to Turner and Waltas, and how helpless she’d been to stop it.::

:: By the time she ended her “report”, it was clear there was much more left unspoken.::

:: Aurora just listened and nodded. ::

James: How do you feel right now?

:: AJ could easily venture a guess, but she wasn’t about to voice her opinion, so she let the woman answer for herself. ::

T’Lea: Untrustworthy.

:: That summed it up. The other feelings were probably obvious to the Counselor; it was classic text-book stuff, but how was she supposed to function if she couldn’t trust herself?::

James: What happened to you was...horrific, I think we can all agree to that. I also believe, that both the crew and your family know that it wasn’t really you and that you are not to blame. You are just as much a victim here as they are, maybe even more so.

:: Victim. There was one word she never thought she’d be associated with, and it [...]ed her off.::

T’Lea: What now then? I’m having frakking nightmares about murdering my loved ones. I can’t touch my own wife without recoiling in fear. I can’t even look at Tyr, or Toni without having flashbacks. What’s the solution here?

James: My suggestion is this. Meditate, reflect, forgive yourself, and move on. I will also insist you come see me once a week so I can help you through this alright?

:: She gave the Counselor a frank Vulcan eyebrow of criticism.::

T’Lea: That’s it?

James: We’ll start our sessions as soon I come back from the Victory, in the mean time, talk to Della. Spend time with her and your kids. Its amazing how the comfort of family can heal wounds, especially after an ordeal such as this. I know you’re scared and so do they, but you have to face the fear in order to deal with it. No one can do that for you.

:: The swear word that came out of T’Lea’s mouth as she got to her feet was sharp and biting, but also accepting of the advice. A part of her knew this would be the answer all along, and it certainly wasn’t going to be easy.::

T’Lea: So how do I do this? I’ve moved out of the house and I’m staying in a hotel room until things get… better. What am I supposed to do, have dates with my wife?

:: It was spoken with sarcasm and meant to ridicule the whole idea that the counselor was presenting to her.::

James: If that’s what you feel you need to do before you can trust yourself enough to be with Della then yes!

:: Aurora’s voice was concise, to the point, and dead serious. Aurora’s intense green eyes were trained on the hybrid and she wasn’t about to back down no matter how angry T’Lea was with her suggestion. ::

:: Of course, T’Lea’s sarcastic suggestion was exactly what was expected of her. She resigned a sigh and agreed with a nod that she would try.::

T’Lea: What about Toni and Tyr? I almost killed them. What if they don’t want to see me? What then?

James: I saw the way you were treated at the party, they were concerned about you. For once in your life T’Lea, let them. Putting up the tough girl act may work some of the time, but when it comes down to it, you’ve got a family who loves you beyond the stars and a crew that thinks of you as family. Apologize to them individually or as a group, they’ve probably already realized that it wasn’t your fault and the apology is more to help you be able to forgive yourself.

:: Everything she *didn’t* want to hear was what she was being told. She rubbed at her shoulder, the one Tyr had sliced open, paced a few steps away from the Counselor’s desk toward the window so that the room wouldn’t feel like it was closing in on her.::

T’Lea: Forgive myself. ::she scoffed:: Everything that has happened is because of me. Perhaps I don’t deserve to be forgiven.

:: Harsh words, but honest. She turned back to the Counselor.::

T’Lea: They deserve an apology. I know. It’s just… how? I have no right to ask them to forgive me. I ruined their lives, how can I ask anything from them after that?

James: Take it one day at a time. Start by meditating in your hotel room then have Della over for dinner. Talk to her. Tell her everything about how you feel, and why you feel the way you do. Have open and honest conversations with her.

:: She turned back to the window and shut down her emotions a little to say her next words. They sounded very Vulcany and straightforward.::

T’Lea: Being close to her causes great anxiety. Perhaps I should approach Tyr first.

:: He had, after all, tried to talk to her in the ballroom the other night. It was just an excuse, and she knew it. So did the Counselor apparently.::

James: Start. With. Della. She is your wife. After the first week of talking to just Della, then see if you think you can talk to Tyr and Toni, if you need to, ask Della to go with you. She is capable of moral support, and she would do it in a heartbeat if asked.

:: The Romu-vulc imbued herself with silence, closed her eyes and concentrated on the heat of the sun that was being magnified through the glass of the window that she was standing in front of.::

:: Everything the Counselor said was logical, understandable, and difficult to hear, but they would be even more difficult to do. What could she say in return to all of that? Nothing, except protest, and that was *not* why she was here.::

:: So she kept her feeling on the matter, and her mouth shut.::

:: It was clear the woman in front of Aurora was irritated, confused, scared, and a myriad of other emotions. However, AJ did note how hard it must have been for T’Lea to walk into this office, at all without being dragged in. AJ pulled out a PADD and typed up a prescription form to aid the symptoms of T’Lea’s PTSD. ::

James: It’s a process, T’Lea. I never said it would be easy, just that it had to be done. I have just sent sickbay a list of prescription meds that should help ease the symptoms. I am prescribing you an antidepressant, sleep meds, and a short term anti anxiety medication. And before you get it into your head that I am not qualified to be handing out prescription medication I will have you know that I hold a Ph.D in Psychology as well as an M.D. specifically so I can handle situations such as these. I’ve included a pamphlet with the indicated dosages, how often they should be taken, and when you should start weaning yourself off the anti-anxiety meds. You can pick them up in sickbay as soon as we’re done here.

:: The hybrid turned from the window and glanced over at the desk where the redhead was typing away at a data padd.::

T’Lea: I’m not here to question your authority, Counselor.

:: She said plainly, and moved toward the desk with her hands clasped behind her back. There wasn’t much more to be said from T’Lea – she had her orders, it was just a question of, would she follow them?::

:: AJ kept typing on her PADD continually looking between T’Lea and the PADD. She typed a message to Della. ::

======
Della, I’ve spoken to T’Lea. She’s not in the best shape as one can imagine, as I am Victory bound for the next mission, I have instructed T’Lea to get a hotel room and arrange dates with you so that she can come to terms with what’s happened, she is also on medication. See if she’s improved in the first week, then offer moral support when she talks to Tyr and Toni. At the moment the best thing you can do for her is just be there and talk to her. Remind her that she is loved and that you won’t hold what happened against her. I know this will be hard on all of you but its a step in the right direction.

Lt.JG. Dr. Aurora James - Embassy Counselor

======

:: T’Lea was looking at the Counselor expectantly when she finished typing.::

James: I didn’t give any information that breeches patient confidentiality T’Lea, but I did tell Della the roll I want her to take in your recovery. Despite how messed up Della may be herself, she will do anything she can to make sure you recover, of that I’m sure. Now it’s your turn T’Lea. Can you promise me right here and now that you will try to do everything in your power to ensure you make it through this including taking all of your meds as directed and taking it one day at a time?

:: She disliked pills of any kind, however, on a temporary basis she would adhere to the Counselor’s instructions. If not, then what was the point of coming here?::

:: T’Lea gave the redhead a firm, committed nod.::

James: I’m glad to hear it.

T’Lea: I’ll pick up the prescriptions now.

:: She headed for the door, and on the way out briefly admitted her gratitude in a softly spoken, “Thank you.”::

James: You’re welcome.

:: AJ smiled, and waited for T'Lea to be fully gone before submitting an official notes in her file and heading off to find Irina again. ::

--
JP By:

Lt. JG. Aurora James, AKA: AJ
Counselor
Embassy Duronis II - USS Thunder
NCC - 70605-A

&

Lieutenant Commander T’Lea
Chief Science Officer
Embassy Duronis II - USS Thunder NCC - 70605-A