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Funny things heard on the USS Gorkon


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  • 3 weeks later...

 

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Fortune: ::muffled:: ...please inform the Admiral I now live in the trash. Thank you.

 

No!!!! Poor Corliss! 🤣

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  • 3 weeks later...

Happy New Year all!

 
Winner of the November Quote of the Month (a very tight race this month) is Lieutenant Cory Stoyer, with this one:
 
Stoyer: I am lulling you guys into overconfidence before I beat y’all.
 
Congratulations, Cory! Awesome work as always. 
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And, of course, Serren—a hardened Security officer with not only his own training to rely upon, but multiple other lifetimes, including one spent studying the Borg, one as another (different) Security officer, and one as a combat fight pilot with veteran experience—acted in an entirely appropriate and reasonable manner as befitting a paragon of Trillish grace, wisdom, and dignity.

 

Tan: IEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! RAT! RAT! RAAAAAT!

Graceful and precious @Alleran Tan

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  • 4 weeks later...
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Meru turned her attention to her teammates. Commander Neathler she felt she knew fairly well at this point – she was an incredibly capable officer and she had a pet koala. The Trill officer, however…. Meru didn’t really know the man at all, but Ena had spoken highly of him after he helped rescue her on Darime IV, and he probably didn’t have a pet koala. 

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Tahna: Actually, it’s kind of weird. The only residual biomatter I’m picking up is from our guest. I didn’t think even Vulcans were that meticulously neat. Good news is, there’s no parasites aboard to murder us. 

 

Thank you for the chuckle, @Tahna Meru😄

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Alieth: Just keep your spine in place for the moment, mister Marshall, I need you in one piece for the time being.

 

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Somehow, Bear found the inner strength not to explain the intricacies of escape pods and how, they too, were built from large metal, and not wood, cloth, tarp, or anything else that might spring to mind. It was difficult, but clamped his jaw shut, lest he feel the wrath of a five-foot-nothing Vulcan once more. 

YaY, thank you @Alieth and @Jo Marshall for the laugh. Just make sure everyone in that runabout returns in one piece. 😉

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Tahna had asked an entirely reasonable question, phrased very politely: "Volcano-pop?". Much better than, "What are you babbling about now?".

Thanks for the laugh before creeping us out, @Alleran Tan 😅

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I think this might be my favourite line in my time here at SB118. Thanks for the literal spit-take, @Jo Marshall. My nose hates you now. 

 

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In there, however, in the soup of whatever time had forgot, it was akin to squeezing freshly pressed latinum from between the buttcheeks of the Grand Nagus. 

 

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here @Quinn Reynolds giving me the creeps. Not funny! not funny at all!

 

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Everything stopped. 

 

There was nothing. 

 

A complete void of experience; no light, no sound, not even the soft drum of her heartbeat inside her chest. Just a consciousness, a collection of thoughts held together by gossamer threads, waiting to drift apart and scatter across infinity like the broken shell of a star. 

afraid-scared.gif

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Our winner for the QotM for December is none other than the amazing bewigged counsellor, Corliss Fortune, with this gem:
 
Fortune: ::muffled:: ...please inform the Admiral I now live in the trash. Thank you.
 
The accommodations on the Gorkon are sometimes spartan, but this is taking it a bit far!
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O. Marshall: That's more like it, Stoyer. Keep it up. ::Droll as ever, he continued while making console adjustments.:: Communications are fried here. We'd have better success strapping a petty officer to the hull in an EVA suit and asking her to scream into the void.

Let's keep the Petty Officers away from Bear for the time being. 😄 @Jo Marshall

 

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Quinn exhaled, a faint hint of impatience sailing on her breath, and subtly shook her head slightly. Why—with the massive real estate the viewscreen offered—hadn’t she simply shown both charts at the same time? 

A castle on the bridge. We'll request it together with the ball pool in the CMO's office. 😁 @Quinn Reynolds

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The Ferengi woman eyeballed the Chief Science officer. She’d asked for an explanation in layman's terms, and received what might as well have been a dissertation in Greek for all the help it was to her. The words made sense to her individually, but she was always more of an applied mathematics person than hard science.

@Lephi and thus I started my day with a chuckle 😄

Edited by Samira Neathler
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Jona very carefully avoided any untoward stray thoughts about the phrase "biggest rod" and tried to focus on the problem at hand.

 

@Jona ch'Ranniyou naughty :D

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It wasn’t as though they could rope in Alieth’s monster hound and have her ferry messages to the officers of the ship, the way St. Bernards had once delivered brandy to avalanche victims.

 

@Quinn Reynoldsd8p5nsl-52e2337d-d4d7-4344-a9e9-9e033aff

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The words morphed before her eyes into a string of Cardassian. She could make out a few of them from her very brief stint in her Cardassian…Bajoran…collaborator…death…but the rest was far beyond her capabilities.

 

This line referencing a shoreleave backsim filled me with delight and made me crack a chuckle even when I shouldn't have, just by remembering it. Damn you @Tahna Meru

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Hello fellow spookers and spookees,

 
The winner of the first QOTM for this year, January, is none other than the amazingly talented new Engineer, Lieutenant Lephi, reminding us of the very important things in life with this line:
 
Lephi: Ah, that’s a shame! oO Rule of Aquisition number two hundred twenty-three: Beware the man who doesn't make time for oo-mox. oO
 
It's been a sincere pleasure reading all Lephi's work since coming aboard, and this is just a hint of all the good things to come.
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Perhaps it was time to initiate The Third Prank War. No one on the Gorkon would see it coming, not even that piece of Bear who somehow shared genetic material with Jo, with a surplus of body mass and a greater likelihood of ending up on the wrong end of a nerve pinch. Though, she would need a stool to get to that Doric column he insisted on carrying around as a neck.

She does have a way with words, doesn't she? 😄 @Alieth

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Ayiana suddenly found the scorch marks on the wall *extremely* fascinating. They were remarkable; in fact, they could possibly be the best scorch marks Ayiana had ever seen. Maybe she could cut them out, frame them, and sell them. Yes, that sounded like a good idea.

 

sh’Qynallahr: Response

 

Once she heard the… admonishment finish behind her, she returned to the group. Goodbye, lovely scorch mark.

What to do when part of a conversation is not meant for your ears. 😄 Thank you for the chuckle @Ayiana Sevo.

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On 3/4/2022 at 7:42 PM, Samira Neathler said:

What to do when part of a conversation is not meant for your ears. 😄 Thank you for the chuckle @Ayiana Sevo.

She's been on the receiving end of the Admiral's recriminations. It is not a fun place. Ayiana is glad it is not her for once.

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Lephi: Normally the saying goes that a lack of planning on your part does not constitute an emergency on mine, BUT, I'm an engineer so everyone's poor planning is my emergency apparently.

Poor @Lephi! But this made me chuckle.

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Jagged edges of the hull framed the blinking stars embedded in velvety blackness just beyond. Such a sight brought wonder and terror at the same time. He never loved engineering and containment fields as much as he did in that moment.

We all love our cranky engineering team in moments like this, aren't we @Bryce Tagren-Quinn?

Good one! :D

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It wasn’t that he’d have to tell the Admiral that a chunk of her ship exploded on his watch. Though the woman could eviscerate him with only a stare, nothing she could do could compare to the loss of a friend.

 

@Quinn Reynoldslaser eyes: confirmed

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In fact, as far as laws went; gravity was her favourite. 

 

@Lephiknows the best laws to obey... guess she knows which do not too ;)

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Forcibly ejected through a hull breach by an invisible being: definitely not one of her top five ways to die. 

Now I want to read that list, @Tahna Meru... for science!

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