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Ensign Rennyn & Ensign Sovak - Nothing More Than Feelings


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((Deck 3 - USS Atlantis))

::Ren Rennyn arrived outside his quarters to find a nervous Vulcan waiting for him.::

SOVAK: Ren. I... Hello.

::The look on Sovak's face said he was eager to talk. His body language said he was anxious to run away.::

RENNYN: Yeah, I Hello, too.

::Ren didn't know how to feel. He'd known Sovak since their first day at the Academy. They'd been roommates through thick and thin in some of the most stressful, intense, significant years of their lives, training to be officers and explorers of the galaxy. Sovak had been through a lot in his quest to become a better Vulcan, to reach the control of emotion that was like second nature to so many of his people back home. Ren had never thought to explore any feelings beyond friendship. He didn't know how to think about it now.::

::The Trill did his best to always stay cool, to be laid-back and take things as they come. Not to get upset or bent out of shape. Sometimes, that could backfire.::

::He opened the door and motioned to Sovak to follow him inside. They both stood and looked at the mess of flowers Sovak had put there, the romantic gesture of his temporary, mind-altered, space-cloud-affected insanity. Neither man knew what to say.::

::Rover floated in behind them.::

RENNYN: Don't mind him, Sovak. Just my shadow.

::Ren walked further into the room. He found himself automatically following the track of crushed flowers he'd made earlier, not to destroy any more. It wasn't easy. He picked up a paloue blossom, native to Trill. They'd grown in wide, fragrant patches all around his home.::

::For the first time since taking Ren's form, Rover billowed and swirled and became a cloud again, reducing in size and floating away to rest in a corner near the ceiling.::

RENNYN: Good boy.

::The Trill wished he could do the same about now.::

::Sovak stepped forward and cleared his throat. He looked more awkward than ever before. He looked more confident than ever before.::

SOVAK: Ren. You got my flowers?

::Rennyn couldn't hate the attempt at humor. It was just the kind of thing he would say. He waited for more. Sovak swallowed hard and began.::

SOVAK: I am sorry I did not tell you sooner how I feel. It must be obvious now. On the advice of a friend, I am here to tell you directly, because I do not want to risk being unclear. Ren, if my struggles to control my emotions, to rise above them and live as other Vulcans do, have seemed to go poorly for me, it is because there are some feelings I do not think I wish to live without. The way I feel when I am with you, for example, is a feeling I cherish. It is my fervent hope that you could feel that way too. So. I am here.

::Ren was silent. He was very aware of the angry contortions on his own face, but he wasn't sure what he was angry about. Sovak for saying all this? Himself for not already knowing? Rover for being so danged colorful and innocent? He was so tired he could barely think. He picked an unreasonable place to start.::

RENNYN: And who exactly where you discussing me with?

SOVAK: Lt. Ravenscroft. As a man partnered with a fellow Starfleet officer, his advice seemed appropriate to our situation.

RENNYN: OUR situation?

::Ren was pacing back and forth now. He couldn't get his head clear. He couldn't think.::

SOVAK: I found I needed to discuss us with an external source.

RENNYN: Us. US. US? You're working from a lot of assumptions here.

::Sovak blinked serenely.::

SOVAK: You must remain calm.

::Here it came. The backfire. The tantrum, welling up from deep within. Ren felt so angry, he could barely get a word out of his mouth.::

RENNYN: You d-- That f-- nnf-Guh--!

SOVAK: Ren, please sit down. I am concerned for your blood pressure.

RENNYN: My bl-- Fluh--

SOVAK: Are you hyperventilating? Shall I replicate a paper bag?


::Ren exploded in one of his loudest tantrums yet. His face was a brighter red than his uniform, and smoke may have billowed from his ears. Sovak and his infuriatingly sideways logic!::

RENNYN: You wrong way, backwards-brained Vulcan! Just because some dang fool cut rate counselor lite with nothing but a psych degree by marriage and more mouth than sense told you to chuck all with basic dang thinking and rush on over here with your hot-blooded heart on your half-baked, feelings-ridden, passion-obsessed, illogical, headlong hobgoblin sleeve doesn't give you the right to lurk outside my quarters and come in here so infuriatingly calm and logical and talk sense to me like I'm the one pulling addle-brain, loon-crazy stunts like this!

::He threw the paloue blossom down for emphasis.::

SOVAK: You are being unreasonable.

RENNYN: You bet I'm being reasonable! Oh, that's not what you said. Well dang it, Sovak, I'm right about this!

SOVAK: There's no need to yell.

::The flashing white lights in the corner let Ren know he was upsetting Rover. He breathed and forced himself to calm down.::

RENNYN: You're right. I'm sorry. You don't deserve to be hollered at. You know my temper. I'm sorry.

SOVAK: I find your tantrums charming.

::Ren immediately went back to yelling.::

RENNYN: You find my tantrums charming! What the - what? Guhhh--! Since when? That's what I want to know! Since when?

::He sat down, trying to find some calm. Sovak hadn't done anything wrong, but this was all so much to think about, Ren could hardly figure his way through it. He realized how many flowers he'd sat on and jumped back up again. They were all over him. He spun in a circle, brushing them off. Varieties of pollen stuck to his uniform. Rover swirled in a new pattern that might have been laughter or sympathy. When Ren stopped spinning and swatting at himself, he found Sovak looking miserable.::

SOVAK: Have I ruined our friendship?

::Ren stood very still a moment. He hadn't been fair. At the least he had to appreciate Sovak's honesty, and how difficult it must have been to come by it. He stepped forward and reached out, holding Sovak's shoulders in an uncertain grip. It was a first contact. It was at arm's length.::

RENNYN: This is a lot to think about. To reconsider. I need a little time. I don't want to put you through that, but it's how I feel. I'm exhausted from this mission, I'm tired. I've got heartburn from all that fried food. I've got this guy, this swirling space joker, over my shoulder every minute. I'm kind of loving him, but come on. He followed me into the shower. I've got --

::He wanted to complain about the flowers all over everything, but they were beautiful. They were in the way, they were excessive, but they were beautiful. And he'd crushed enough of them for one day.::

RENNYN: Let me get my head down and sleep. Is that okay?

::Sovak backed away, breaking the touch. Squaring off to face the Trill outright, directly, he nodded. His apparently calm Vulcan demeanor had remained intact through most of the exchange. Ren knew this Vulcan well, or thought he did. That calmness meant he was particularly broken up inside.::

SOVAK: I am patient.

::A silence ensued that was very like Sovak, but very unlike Ren. Rover read the room and stayed dark. At last, having had enough of trying to read the Trill's face, the Vulcan moved again.::

SOVAK: I've provided you with access to my room.

RENNYN: What the--?

SOVAK: I mean nothing by it. I thought you could sleep. While you do, I'll clean up here.

RENNYN: That... is very thoughtful of you.

SOVAK: Rover can stay with me, so that you may be alone.

RENNYN: Alright...

SOVAK: And your room will be in order when you return.

::It was a good plan. It was considerate. Ren feared he was being unkind, letting Sovak say all that about his feelings, then yelling at him and running away. Then again, he'd been ambushed by this. He needed the space.::

::To prove his intentions, Sovak began gathering some nearby flowers.::

RENNYN: Be good, Rover.

ROVER: Good night.

::Ren was feeling alright now. Not so bad. The thought of laying a kiss on that sweet, goofy Vulcan wasn't entirely disagreeable. Afraid of that thought, he instead moved to the door, standing close enough to open it, exposing them to the corridor outside.::

::He turned back to the Vulcan.::

RENNYN: You know what? Leave me a few of those flowers, okay? Some larkspur, alcenthas. The paloues are nice...

::He started to turn, scratched his head, turned again, and left before he said anything more. The door closed. On opposite sides, both men breathed deeply and tried not to panic.::

Ensign Rendal Rennyn
Helm Officer
USS Atlantis


Ensign Sovak
simmed by Ren Rennyn

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