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Segolene LeMarnix

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Posts posted by Segolene LeMarnix

  1. I would tell the players that I have some OOC work that needs to be done, then ask for volunteers for the committee. Those wanting to advance in rank would be interested in extra OOC work they could do toward that end.

    Sorry Captain, misunderstanding - you are talking of how to accomplish less reading while I'm trying to get ships that don't participate in the contest attracted to join.

    • Like 1
  2. An inherent problem with the top sims contest is a lot of times the sims are removed from a storyline in progress or a mission and the reader has trouble connecting with its they feel like they missed a whole bunch of other things. I mean, why would I read about a character having a problem and I don't know who this person is? I don't know how to fix this except maybe having a OOC description of the situation and a link to the character bio?

    My comment in last year's topic about improving the contest was to ask those who are proposing the sim to explain the reasons. That way we would be also introduced to the story behind the sim - to that "personal" resons, or character development side of the sim.

    Would it help to form a committee on each ship to choose the top sim from their ship each month to submit? They could have an OOC vote on which sim was best among the players, then submit only for one each month. That way all ships are represented equally every month.

    How? How would you get writers to apply into that committee?

    • Like 1
  3. I don't know about improving, I made a comment when just arrived about it and now have to say I strongly believe it would be very wrong to implement it, because it would get even less people to post the sims.

    Question is can we have everything - better participation from all the ships and less to read. We can't have both, and I vote for better participation.

    I believe that each ship has at least one writer who is active on the Forum, so that one should be in charge of reminding shipmates of not just Top Sim Contest, but everything that is going on on the forum and remind them to visit here more often.

    • Like 1
  4. ((Captain's Quarters, USS Discovery))

    ::It came from decades of serving aboard a starship. The subtle, yet distinct
    sound of a starship dropping out of warp. He awoke slowly, warmth and comfort
    fighting him each step of the way. Kieran lay beside him and he smiled,
    realizing that part of the comfort he felt was the change in the bond between
    them. Before, the bond was a burden, feeling incomplete and fractured, and he
    realized that this was from their indiscretion the night they had met. Now, the
    bond was still there, but it was whole, complete, and instead of weakness it
    provided strength. Unfortunately for Kieran, it gave Tyr the strength he needed
    to go through with what he intended to do.::

    ::Rising from the bed, he gently kissed her forehead, then covered her back up
    with the blankets, trying his best not to wake her. He moved to the shower and
    let the real water run over him; hot, relaxing and cleansing. When the shower
    was through he pulled on a towel, and retrieved his dress whites from the
    closet. Pulling on underwear and then the uniform, he combed out his long hair
    and tied it into a ponytail. The Captain checked himself in the mirror, then
    turned to look at the sleeping form of Kieran one more time.::

    WALTAS::Softly:: I'm sorry, Kieran. I have to do this.

    ((Turbolift, USS Discovery))

    o O One more time. O o

    ::He was in his dress whites, with campaign ribbons, medals and citations
    dripping from the left breast area of the uniform. Four golden pips gleamed from
    the white collar, and his black polished boots echoed as he stepped onto the
    bridge. In full military dress, he looked like the heroes of old he'd seen in
    the pictures of the Federation and back through military history. Picard. Kirk.
    Archer. Petraeus. Nimitz. Halsey. McArthur. Eisenhower. Patton. Sherman. Grant.
    Jackson. Washington. Although the Ba'ku was too modest to compare himself to any
    of the figures, he would acknowledge the similarity in appearance. All of them
    echoed through time, their pictures with their shining ribbons and medals, rank
    insignias and deeds forever burned into the pages of history. Old warriors,
    fading with time.::

    ::Discovery was docked. The bridge was empty. Moored at the repair facility high
    above Earth, Discovery was a ghost town. He walked in silently, taking in every
    console, every chair, every station. His long career had placed him at all of
    the stations except Science and Engineering (and Starfleet had likely saved
    several ships by ensuring he didn't occupy these posts), but the place he had
    felt most at home and, truthfully, fit him the best (whether he liked it or not)
    was the command chair.::

    ::He'd earned his fourth pip quite some time ago, taking over from Captain
    McCall, who had gone on to found the Intel wing of Discovery. He had seen a
    long, fairly distinguished career, having commanded Discovery through many
    trials and tribulations. The Saurians. The Dyson Sphere. Q's meddling. The
    Camelot adventure. Countless others.::

    ::He moved from the command chair to the First Officer's chair, his hand resting
    on the back headrest. He had been in Raj's place. He was McCall's First Officer,
    with the two working together to accomplish herculean tasks-including defending
    the entire Starbase with a fleet of Starships against a Romulan incursion. He
    had disobeyed McCall's final command, racing to rescue him from his Romulan
    captors before they executed him. It was during this mission that Tyr had earned
    his fourth pip, and he hoped that Raj was well on his way to following in his
    footsteps.::

    ::Before that he was Second Officer on Starbase 118-Ops as a Lt. Commander. He
    remembered taking the original Discovery out on his first cruise in command, the
    run-in with the pirates and their subsequent arrest. He moved to the now-dark
    Security station. He was a Lieutenant on the Constitution, Tactical officer. His
    hand gently touched the Sisko Tactical Cross he'd earned during that time,
    mostly for his maneuvers against the Borg. He'd paid a heavy price for that
    medal-nearly being killed after being assimilated and turning against his
    crew.::

    ::Finally, he walked to the two front stations. He'd occupied both, but his love
    was helm, and it was the first duty post he'd ever had. An accomplished pilot,
    Tyr never had lost his love of flying, and maneuvering the massive Galaxy-class
    Constitution had earned him the respect of his crewmates. Giving the Helm
    station a final, gentle pat, he walked back to the turbolift doors. They slid
    open silently.::

    WALTAS::Softly:: Goodbye.

    ::He turned his back on the bridge and entered the turbolift.::

    WALTAS: Transporter Room 1. Override stops.

    ::The turbolift chirped obediently, taking the Captain to the transporter room.
    He stepped in, finding Raj waiting for him, similarly dressed. He offered an
    encouraging smile.::

    ====================================
    Captain Tyr Waltas
    Commanding Officer
    USS Discovery

    • Like 1
  5. ((Spawning Ground, The Void))

    :: Iron Breaker could sense them before he even reached their ancient spawning ground. Or rather he could sense the absence of them. The Hardskins were immune to their natural powers. Entirely invulnerable to the control they so easily asserted over others, and it was that immunity that made them a void in the sea of thoughts the Collosoforms swam through. One Hardskin limped towards a massive concentration of its kind, further off and another, stranger, Hardskin sat silently in space. This stranger was different. Iron Breaker could sense them in the void sea. Hundreds of thoughts and emotions glowing like a hundred stars, each a separate voice. But among those lights there were voids. Like the Predators that have dogged their people since time immemorial. And on the Hardskin Predator, where there was always cold void, emptiness, there was now a handful of lights. ::

    :: Iron Breaker seethed. Born in Broken Light postured and flashed like the youngling that he was, always ready to first warn and threaten. Never acting. Iron Breaker acted. The old, scarred veteran undulated forwards, gaining speed quickly. He dispensed with flashing off a threat, and instead allowed his anger and fury to set him in a pure white glow. His carapace was pitted and cracked along nearly every foot. A half dozen massive metal spars stuck from him in odd angles, war trophies he'd earned fighting the Hardskin Predators for multiple generations. Their harpoons still glinting in the dull light he gave off. One of his feelers was missing, sheared off by the Predators grasping claws before he had torn it completely off in his rage and spilled the Predators into the sea. To his kind he was ancient and knarled, no longer young and swift like Born in Broken Light, but massive and immensely powerful. A warrior with few equals among his people, and a storied history filled with shattered Hardskins and countless victories. ::

    :: He moved directly towards the new threat and dispensed with the usual psychic bow wave his kind usually put off. Instead he focused his mind towards rousing the swarms that clung in torpor to his carapace. The twitched and rose groggily, quickly shaking off their slumber and becoming aware. Iron Breaker aimed for the long flat disc that made up the new Hardskins bulk and angled his strike to drag and skid along its top surface. He rocketed past Born in Broken Light without so much as a pulse of greeting and slammed into the Hardskin with gratifying force. He raked along it's edge from one end to another and felt a burst of satisfaction as multiple holes were opened by his rigid flank. The swarm needed no further encouragement and went to work. ::

    :: Passing the rear of the Hardskin, Iron Breaker turned tightly between the two glowing spars of the creature and coiled to strike again. This time he rose up between the spars and past the disk, up and up until he was looking down on the new, weaker Hardskin. He paused a moment to take in this new foe and wondered why it hadn't clumsily fired any spears at him yet. It made no matter. The lights inside were flickering and dying in places and he was hungry to snuff out others. Like a shot he descended on the Hardskin and smashed through an invisible barrier of force. The act hurt but it was not beyond him to breach it and he screamed into the void as he shattered the field. The feedback shook him inside and made him sick for a moment, but it only arrested his descent by a fraction and he smashed into the top of the disk section, rupturing the Hardskin in multiple places. ::

    :: With a roar Iron Breaker found purchase with his carapace and gripped hard, buckling the Hardskin beneath him. With enough force and a good grip he would begin to tear this foe creature to shreds. ::

    Iron Breaker
    Cosmozoan Guardian and Warrior

    as simmed by

    Lieutenant Oliver Weston
    Intelligence Officer
    USS Drake

    • Like 1
  6. ((Holodeck 3, StarBase 118))

    Able: Hell if I know. She's an impressive looking ship with a nice doctor and a decent XO, but that's all I know so far. Her service record's certainly impressive. As for the rest, look me up after the first tour and I'll tell you!

    ::Thera smiled at the young engineer.::

    MGia: Wise words.

    Able: So, Thera was it? What kinds of things do you end up dealing with in Security here? Can't imagine a place like this is exactly a hotbed of crime...

    MGia: I am new here, but I am sure we do have a lot of dark corners. There is always a place for crime. But I was reassigned due to my specialty.

    ::B'Sara got herself a little lost in the conversation, watching the pair of them together with a slight mixture of jealousy, amusement, and feeling like she had just been upstaged by the Andorian woman... although Able was about her height, and had a wonderful dark color for a skin tone, and such an easy-going nature... oO Am I falling for this guy? Oo ::

    :: She was debating whether or not MGia swiped her thunder when her senses kicked in, feeling someone step in next to her. Glancing over, she blinked, feeling suddenly owl-like, looking at Captain Nicholotti shooting a smile at her. oO Uh oh.... what did I do? Oo ::

    Nicholotti: B'Sara?

    :: B'Sara had a sickening feeling this was about the R&D Lab incident, gulping while looking briefly back at Able and MGia. Now she was thinking maybe she *should* try that horrid burning drink again. And licked her lips before biting on them. ::

    Cavann: Captain Nicholotti.

    Nicholotti: I know we've met before, though under darker circumstance, and lighting conditions. ::The smile turned into a bit of a grin.:: I thought maybe we could try that again.

    :: B'Sara closed her eyes a moment, mostly to cover her attempts to beat down her suddenly beating heart and stop her emotions from playing the worst case scenario. oO Don't panic... don't panic... it's not that bad... I'm not the reason Science looks like the remains of Pompeii... Oo Although, as bits of the events played out in memory, she perked up again thinking about what she suspected was... ::

    :: So, what was she supposed to do? Oh hell... protocols managed to go "poof" in B'Sara's memories, even though she had just came out of the Academy. There was something decidedly not fair about that. She looked at the Captain, feeling a little helpless and extremely nervous, and trying really hard not to fidget, although she wished she had one of her hand tools. ::

    :: And then Captain Nicholotti stuck out a hand. ::

    Nicholotti: I'm Kalianna. Walk with me?

    :: B'Sara stared, feeling somewhat dumbstruck the Captain would take such a personal approach, before following the Captain's gesture to the water edge. She didn't know what to think, and her mind was spinning, both from Greg's touch to her back, which brought feelings and things she wasn't sure she was ready to deal with, as her mother came to the forefront, of all things. She had so very few memories of her birth mother. But she remembered B'Selle used to hum to her at night at bedtime. It was that humming, something old, something familiar but never could put her finger on it... that made her feel safe. But that was before her mother was gone, before she met the crew of the Independence, and before she met and found David. oO No... not David. Dad. Oo ::

    ::And so they walked. Kali realized, in the moments of silence that seemed to follow, that she’d not really had much of a plan. To talk? Was that it? She glanced over at B’Sara and tried to come up with something, but something already seemed to be going through her mind. Slowing as they approached the water’s edge, Kali watched her continue on as if trying to hide the tears she’d thought she saw.::

    :: B'Sara had to force herself to stop the tears welling in her eyes, hesitant. She wished she didn't know what she did, but it didn't stop her from breaking apart from the group, including the Captain, and walking toward the water's edge while wiping her eyes. ::

    ::If Kali hadn’t had a plan before, now she was even less prepared to know what to say. There was a need to make some kind of a good first impression, or second as it may have been, just because of her importance in the life that she’d just found, but for all the experience as a Starfleet Captain she had, Kali was speechless.::

    ::After a moment, she stepped forward and put a hand on B’Sara’s shoulder.::

    Nicholotti: It’s alright...

    :: Shivering slightly at the touch, B’Sara had to block her empathic and telepathic sensations as she stopped at the water. She stared out over the body of water as she felt a separation from her thoughts and emotions. oO Finally! Oo The training paid off. Whatever happened, at least she would handle herself with dignity and as any officer here would. She didn't know why the Captain decided to appraoch her and single her out, but thinking of her dad, she didn't want to be an embarrassment. And realized, suddenly, that what she did from this point forward, would reflect. She hadn't considered that, but then again, no one told her that her dad was found, either. ::

    :: Water was good for thoughts. Maybe it was the ebbs and tides (even though it was a holodeck simulation), but it forced several things that B'Sara hadn't considered. Secretly, she admitted to herself a part of it was getting back here to find out what happened to her father. But apparently, he was found. Even though she had somewhat of a hard time as her premonition from years ago came to the forefront, and all of that was burning in the forefront of her thoughts while she stared at the water, feeling helpless, and confused. ::

    ::There was silence, but sometimes no words were spoken. Sometimes just a state of being was enough. Kali followed her gaze out into the water and watched the waves come in. Time, at least for now, was something she had, and she couldn’t afford to blow this...::

    Cavann: ...if this is about what happened down in Science, Captain, I’m sorry. I tried... I tried to jettison the assembly before it blew.

    Nicholotti: ::Raising an eyebrow.:: Science?

    ::Kali blinked for a moment and recalled, somewhere in the back of her head, something about a lab in a report. But she’d not gotten down through the rest of the Victory when they had arrived back to the station, so it was still very disjointed in her mind. She smiled reassuringly.::

    Nicholotti: No, not about science. I just wanted to talk.

    ::B’Sara looked over at the Captain then, the confusion even moreso now. She felt bad. Livingston at least was willing to let her make up for it, and she just assumed that the report was made, citing her admittance she was at fault. And that just made her feel worse. oO Starfleet... I’ll be lucky if they don’t boot me out after this. Oo. ::

    Cavann: I thought this was about what I did with the R&D lab...

    ::Shaking her head Kali couldn’t help but feel off for not being able to just come out and say what she was thinking. Some things required...more. And though she was still at a loss, she was trying. This was different than how things had been with Rowena, and more important in some ways.::

    Nicholotti: No one was in the lab, and it will all be fixed soon enough. We can worry about that later when I have all the pieces, but don’t worry about that now.

    ::Her own gaze wandered from the woman next to her back out to the water. Instinctively, her hands found their way behind her back, where she clasped them together lightly.::

    Nicholotti: There will be time for that then. This is more important.

    :: B’Sara turned to look at her Captain sharply, surprised. What could possibly be more important than her somewhat illegal lockpicking skills... although she didn’t mention that to Livingston, and felt bad, since he had been so nice, and she really liked him. A part of her felt that if Ben found out she hacked security, it would dim her in his eyes, and she didn’t want that. But she also didn’t know how to explain that it was somewhat personal as well. These were the times she hated Starfleet protocol. ::

    Cavann: ::a hollow laugh:: More important than my actions, Captain? ::after a moment:: ...I wish I could take it back. It’s my fault.

    ::In a way, it was heartbreaking to see her tormented by it. Whatever the actions had been hadn’t shown up in the same report Kali had read, and though they might at some point in the future, it wasn’t what she was trying to do here. With a sigh, she turned around and looked back up the beach towards the crowd.::

    Nicholotti: Kalianna. You can leave ‘Captain’ out there somewhere. ::Gesturing towards the doors.:: This is not the Hub, or the bridge, and I am not on duty.

    ::Her eyes wandered between people and movement, allowing her only glimpses of the main thing she had in common with this girl. And Kali wanted so badly to make things right and to just, perhaps, share a moment, that she’d seemingly led B’Sara down a path that only resulted in worry and regret.::

    Nicholotti: We have something in common that is more important than an R&D lab. Something that has me out here trying to just talk, but I fear it’s hard to leave the rank behind even when the uniform is.

    ::Kali sighed. Perhaps she was trying too hard anyways. They said the truth was always the best route to take, so maybe she would try it.::

    :: Something in common? B’Sara blinked, shaking her head as she backstepped in her thoughts, feeling that she missed something important along the way. This wasn’t about her actions in the R&D on the Victory? That left her feeling even more confused, and uncertain, not sure what to do in this instance. What the Academy taught her was to develop a working strategy, based on what she was given. She wasn’t used to this... a commanding officer who went out of her way and not in a command capacity.. ::

    :: B’Sara wasn’t sure if that was good or bad, and while hating herself, extended her senses at her Captain, so she could at least get a feel. She felt a strange conglamorant of emotions at play, and none of it was related to the commanding officer and newly arrived officer. If anything, B’Sara felt that this was something extremely personal, and instantly hated herself for using her abilities to read her Captain. ::

    Cavann: Captain... I’m sorry. I kinda read you... I don’t make a practice of it! I’m sorry! But I’m really confused right now.

    ::The look on her face was enough to make Kali wonder if she was capable of handling this on her own to begin with. Frowning, she tried to figure out another way to say it, but it all came down to just saying it. Moments ago they had walked down to the water’s edge in a kind of silence, where words, perhaps, were not needed. Yet now, there were words Kali grasped for but couldn’t put together. And so, for a moment, she was quiet, watching the officers up near the bar, while collecting her thoughts.::

    Nicholotti: I’m sorry, you shouldn’t be. Can you do something though?

    ::Somewhat amused, Kali fell more into herself than trying to do what would make the best impression. The grin she was known for appeared slightly.::

    ::Bewildered, B’Sara arched her brows (still wishing she could pull off that one brow raise her dad was able to), uncertain what this was about. But she wasn’t about to disobey a request or an order from her Captain. ::

    Cavann: Yes, ma’am.

    Nicholotti: Say Kalianna.

    :: Time, at least to B’Sara, came to a standstill. She stared at the Captain, uncomprehending, and at a loss to why the Captain would ask her to address her by her first name. Whether the shock registered within her features, she didn’t know. But this was perhaps the strangest order she ever heard of, and for a few moments, seriously debated the wisdom of calling her Captain by her first name. That just seemed.... wrong. ::

    Cavann: ::working her mouth a moment:: ...Kalianna.

    ::Finally seeing that it could be done, Kali laughed.::

    Nicholotti: Very good. Now that we’ve got that... ::her smiled faded and a serious look appeared.:: B’sara, I don’t know how to say it other than to say it. And the pained looks that have crossed your face are making me regret trying to find any other ways.

    ::Her eyes moved from B’Sara, up towards the bar area, and back down towards the water again.::

    Nicholotti: I suddenly find myself in a place I’ve not been before. And you’re a part of it. ::Now she turned and actually pointed up the beach.:: I’ve fallen for your father...and...

    ::And she lost her words.::

    :: A million things hit at once, and B’Sara wasn’t sure what hit first in that moment. Hearing the Captain say she was in love with her dad and pointing him out, or having this dropped out of the blue without any kind of clue that made her feel a mixture of anger and... what? She found herself breathing harder, and staring back at the water, unwilling to look at the Captain for the moment, but feeling a rage unlike anything she had felt before. ::

    :: He was HER DAD... and yet... B’Sara blinked. Too much too fast... her tutors and her counselors warned her about this. She found herself gasping and instead of looking at the water, she looked up into the holodeck’s starry lit sky as she felt her tears betray her and burn her eyes while streaming from her cheeks. Everything screamed at her to yell... she wanted to, so badly, right in this moment. What right did this woman have... a woman she didn’t meet until Sickbay... and under aspicious circumstances, who was her Captain... come to her and tell her that she loved the very person that she had based her life on. Jealousy didn’t begin to cut it... she felt like she was being cut off... and within, felt a boiling rage outside of her character... ::

    :: No... as if she was somehow being replaced. She couldn’t stop herself then, and grimaced before losing the rush of tears that just broke. And she found herself crying, and hated herself for it. She promised herself, and distanced herself... and yet, her emotions got the better of her. ::

    :: What right did she really have? David never knew her real mother. Hell... she never had a real mother. ::

    Cavann: ::somehow finding her voice, sounding small:: ...okay...

    ::The reaction was far from what Kali had hoped for or expected. Immediately she ran through things in her head trying to figure out if there had been another way, a better way... something that would have spared B’sara. And though there may not have been the connection between them as there was between her and David, she found herself heartbroken and searching for a way to fix it. In strange ways, this had brought her far from her stance as a Captain. Everything else was background; all she cared about was the girl in front of her.::

    Nicholotti: I’m sorry... it’s not supposed to be like this...

    :: B’Sara felt small. She had this grandiose scheme of coming back and finding answers, but all she felt she managed to do was become an interloper right now. ::

    ::Now, Kali second guessed every move, and every word. She didn’t want to make it worse, but her new heart ached to make it better. Unable to imagine what was going through her head, she struggled with what to say to someone who wasn’t saying anything. Strangely enough, tears of her own fell.::

    ::Reaching out, she took one of B’Sara’s hands.::

    Nicholotti: Why? I... Now I don’t understand.

    :: B’Sara ripped her hand from Kalianna’s grasp and did turn on her then, heaving while delivering her red, tear-ridden eyes on a woman she barely knew, who was also her commanding officer! ::

    Cavann: Don’t you?! Do you even know? Do you even know what I’ve been through! ::heaving, and suddenly she couldn’t stop, even if she wanted to. :: They wouldn’t tell me ANYTHING! They wouldn’t tell me if he was dead or alive... your stupid classified protocols! He was MY FATHER... the closest thing I ever had to one. And I have to come here to find out he’s alive... and now with someone else that I barely know and is my commanding officer. How am I supposed to feel? Hell... I screamed at him and told him to his face that he was an imposter...

    :: And she folded, losing every bit of composure the Academy taught her, feeling suddenly exposed and hating it. She fell onto her knees and cried, staring down at the water. It wasn’t the Captain’s fault... it really wasn’t... but after watching her biological mother murdered, and left at the mercy of a Son’a who was only after genetic perfection... all B’Sara had was David, and the ship crew... and Starfleet. Who gave her a reason, and a purpose, and a drive to be something more. ::

    B’Sara: ::whispering:: ….just tell me why.

    ::Kali stood there and listened to it all spill into the open. Things that couldn’t be read in reports, or found in everyday conversation. And when B’sara fell to her knees, Kali followed into the sand. If it were possible for her heart to break further, it would have; she felt even more at a loss to fix things that she’d not known about and likely didn’t even have access to. But that didn’t mean she wasn’t going to try like hell to fix them anyways.::

    Nicholotti: I don’t have answers... but I will find them. ::For a moment, Kali hesitated, but then moved forward and wrapped her arms around her.:: Just let me. Let me be a part of this.

    ::As her own tears fell faster, Kali held B’Sara tighter.::

    Nicholotti: Let me be a part of your life.

    :: She remembered... maybe it was the simple touch, or feeling arms wrapped around her again, but she remembered her mother, B’Selle, and the moments when she felt the love unspoken passed between her mother to her, even if she hated what her mother had become. She turned, breaking down and found a shoulder, while unfamiliar, she knew she had wanted so much... it wasn’ t fair. It wasn’t fair! Before she even knew what family was, that had been taken away. She refused to think of herself as an orphan. She wasn’t... David made her feel like she was wanted, that she would be accepted... he didn’t think she was a freak. But deep inside, she felt she was. A freak, made by the designs of a woman still on Starfleet’s 10 Most Wanted. ::

    Cavann: ::crying:: This isn’t how it’s supposed to be.... he’s all I have. You don’t understand... you don’t understand... I don’t have a family. He took me in... he took me, when I had lost everything. Please... please don’t take him away from me. I want my father... I want my family. I want so much to have a family...

    ::Still holding her, Kali let herself melt at the words and the raw emotions behind them. Rocking her gently, she spoke softly.::

    Nicholotti: I won’t take him away, he’s not going anywhere. ::Her own tears drew tracts down her face, but that, nor the fast beating of her heart mattered.:: I want a family too.

    ::Pushing B’Sara’s hair behind her ear and trying to look at her directly, with just as much raw emotion in her eyes as she could feel from the girl in her arms, Kali felt as if she were closer to that now than ever before.::

    Nicholotti: I... I believe we might make a pretty good one... If you wanted to give it a try...

    ::She smiled now, despite the tears, despite the fears that were there, offering a kind of reassurance that came not from the Captain, or a friend, or a fellow officer. There was something deeper about this, and in so many ways, it filled holes that Kali didn’t even realize existed.::

    :: B’Sara felt raw, and exposed, and not necessarily in a way she liked. She heard her words, but outside of David, words were just words. She had heard it as a child and the stupid reassurances from Dr. Riley. She felt herself back in the same situation again, but this time, she wasn’t a child. She sniffed, bringing her emotions somewhat into check, although that was a tenuous barrier. After everything... after having to fight through the coursework on Betazoid when she arrived, and having to fight to earn the right to attend Starfleet Academy, despite her actual age... she didn’t know anymore. It was hell on wheels to have the phyisical appearance and mental growth of an adult and only having lived eleven years. ::

    Cavann: ::staring into Nicholotti’s eyes, unwavering:: Give me a reason to believe you.

    Nicholotti: B’Sara, I can’t live without your father, and... I can’t live without you either. Let me be there...

    ::Kali stared back.::

    Nicholotti: Look for yourself.

    :: Something within her eyes, something about the intensity that drove the Captain made B’Sara abruptly nod. That was open permission to go inside, if she read the Captain right, and she didn’t hesitate to open her empathic and telepathic abilities and extend them to the woman in front of her, dipping into the whirlpool and storm of emotions that at first, took her unaware. B’Sara dipped in further, hating herself for doing it, but at the same time, the protective nature inherent that would fight if anyone ever threatened her or her dad kicked into full gear and she found herself descending into a whirlpool of clashing emotions, fears, hopes, and a desperate need to feel loved. Which rocked her to her core... feeling the raw bitterness of hopes destroyed and left with only the career, and a title that scared most away. Within that moment, she understood then... it was so much like her father to act as he was wont to, often times unpredictable, but always bold and direct. She felt Kalianna’s raw emotions, feeling the streams fork at the rapids, and was hit with a profound guilt for dumping all of her emotions on someone who only wanted to have a family of her own. A family of her own.... ::

    Cavann: ::after a moment:: ...how does that work? I’m just an Ensign under your command... isn’t there a conflict of interest?

    Nicholotti: There is more to us than the uniform...

    ::Though for the longest time, Kali was certain there was nothing else in her world. Now, that outlook had decidedly changed. It was something she was willing to fight for too.::

    Nicholotti: Orders are orders, as much as we might hate them. ::Words from another time came back to her.:: But at the end of the day, I’m just Kalianna.

    :: B’Sara composed herself, drawing in the torrent rage that had taken her, and took a moment to bring it all under some kind of semblance of control. She could still feel her Capain’s emotional turbulence, despite withdrawing, and in that moment, she hated her abilities that her father once said she would master, although at the time, she didn’t believe him. oO Score one for dad for being right. Oo ::

    Cavann: ::feeling old, despite being young:: Rank aside... what did he do to change your mind?

    ::For a moment, Kali thought about the question. Before David Cody, and after the departure of Colt, she’d been certain that her life was set on a course to be dedicated to Starfleet. Those around her had found luck in a more personal realm, and while she’d never been jealous, there were days she had wondered what it was like. Then, one night, he’d asked her to dance, and it changed her whole world.::

    ::And all he’d done was be himself.::

    Nicholotti: ::Smiling.:: He promised he wouldn’t let go.

    :: B’Sara closed her eyes, feeling those exact same words in a different time and place before she headed for the Academy. Say what one will about her father, he kept his promises, no matter what. The Morgan communicator she wore on a necklace hidden from the rest of the world was proof of that. And she had to figure this out... or rather, she needed to decide and make a decision that still made her gut churn. ::

    Cavann: What are you asking me here?

    ::What was she asking? To let her in? To give her a chance to be that which never was... the questions grew exponentially in the wake of the emotions that had flowed. When Kali started this, she’d had no idea of a plan for things, and now she was even more lost, but now it didn’t so much matter. Now it all seemed to fit into the promises that the future could hold.::

    Nicholotti: Family. It’s the one word, I think, that covers it all. I want to build a family with the ones I love. Your father, and you.

    ::And now there was no need to prove the earnest look in Kali’s eyes.::

    :: There was the heart of it all. Watching her biological mother murdered, perhaps, set in motion much of this. If Dr. delaSouza was to be believed, she was the product of the geneticist’s mad schemes and her mother suffered for it, killed by the doctor who took her in and framed the Gorn Invasion to make her death appear as a casualty of war. It was the Independence crew, by and large, who rescued her. But it was Starfleet as a whole the shaped her motivations, and want to become an officer, like all of those who helped her out. What Captain Nicholotti was asking, however, had nothing to do with Starfleet at all.. and B’Sara long ago accepted the dad she always wanted. ::

    :: A mom on the other hand, she hadn’t expected this. ::

    Cavann: You don’t even know me... I can’t call you mom... not yet. Please don’t take that the wrong way... I lost my own mom a long time ago. I’m not saying no... I’m not saying it isn’t possible... but I don’t know you. What I know is my dad did something stupid, and brilliant... and I saw the results the night you and I first met... that woman i saw... she was you, wasn’t she? Some kind of clone.

    ::Now that was a torrent of thoughts, statements, feelings, and questions. Mom? That bit had shocked her a bit. Working on getting her not to call her ‘Captain’ would be a good start. Getting her to be alright with Kali being in her life, and in David’s life, was as well. It wasn’t your perfect family, but it was good. It was... family. Kali could only smile and try to get everything, and try to keep up. It wasn’t exactly the meeting she’d envisioned, but sometimes the universe had its own way of shoving you down the paths that needed to be walked.::

    Nicholottti: All I ask is that you don’t call me Captain, at least not when you don’t have to. I understand, in a way, and all I ask is that you give this a chance. Give me a chance.

    ::It was all part of the fight to not let go...::

    Nicholotti: And that was Anya, my... clone. ::She smirked slightly, trusting this Ensign...this girl...besides, an explanation was the least she owed her.:: You’ve picked up more than his smile. ::After a moment, she sighed.:: I suppose we will address all of that... soon enough.

    ::B’Sara had to make a choice. Walker didn’t believe her, and half the time, she wasn’t sure if she believed herself. But if the Captain was hanging the rank, and was really hoping to forge something that she never imagined in a million years, then this was the place to start. She read her father’s padd, and his work... remembering what happened the last time they spoke. ::

    Cavann: ::drawing a deep breath:: No. We do this now. If you love him as I do, I need you to hear me out, no matter how crazy I sound. I don’t think anyone else will believe me.

    ::Kali’s look turned serious, and somewhere in those eyes she could see how deep this worry went. Sitting back slightly, she nodded, suddenly concerned for David before ever hearing what she had to say. Something about the urgency in his voice at times, the visions he’d spoken about, and even her own glimpse of the white tendrils that day in her office. She wasn’t sure she wanted to hear what was coming, but if it was this important to her, to the girl who held such a special place in David’s life, then Kali would hear her out. Despite the warmth of the beach, a shiver ran through her.::

    Nicholotti: Alright... you have my full attention.

    ::And Kali let everything fade into the background. At this moment, right here and now, this was what was important. B’Sara, and David; the beginnings of the family she’d wanted, perhaps, but had given up on finding.::

    :: Grim, B’Sara searched herself first, wondering if this was even a good idea. ::

    Cavann: Every person has a distinct feel... it’s like a emotional blueprint, their mindset, that’s uniquely them. You’re familiar with Betazoids and their abilities?

    ::Kali nodded. She’d spent plenty of years with Jaxx and had learned a lot from him. That was one area where she did not lack knowledge. Beyond that, she was still a doctor, so she had the benefit of both sides of information.::

    Nicholotti: Yes, I’m fairly experienced with them.

    ::Kali’s eyes never left B’Sara as she spoke. If this was the first promise she’d make, she’d make sure that it was kept. Her focus did not stray, though her anxiety did as all of the urgency, and the clouded expressions, and her concerns for David started coming to the forefront of her mind.::

    Cavann: Maybe one of these days I’ll tell you what Dr. delaSouza did. That’s how I made your... um... twin, I guess. ::shaking her head, shuddering slightly:: I read some of dad’s notes. I wouldn’t want to be him if the Ethics committee ever got wind of his little stunt... anyway, my point is even with your, uh, twin, she has her own unique feel that’s different from you. Call it mindset if you want, maybe that’s the best way to describe it...

    :: B’Sara trailed off. She sounded like a nutjob here. oO That’s all I need. Oo And she was babbling, one of the things she hated about herself. She shook her head. ::

    ::Read his notes? There were many questions in Kali’s head now about how she had done that, but then something clicked in her mind. She was her father’s daughter, and in a way that worried her. David could be more than resourceful, and thus far, she’d not seen anything stop him. He had pulled off some amazing things, one of which was Anya, another of which was how easily he had broken through Kali’s shell. And B’Sara had obviously picked a lot of that up.::

    ::What she was saying made sense, and Kali turned her attention from the notes and Ethics committees to the ‘feeling’ B’Sara attributed to Anya and how it was different from her own. What was she saying...?::

    Nicholotti: She’s become her own person, the moment she woke up. I’m not sure how, but she’s not me. Maybe at one time she was supposed to be me, but it didn’t quite work out that way.

    ::Indeed it hadn’t. Kali recalled the proverbial kick in the chest those first moments had been, and how hard it had been to come to terms with the idea that those immediate actions had been Kali’s final thoughts and feelings made manifest in a place where the same bounds of pure experience had not been built. The clone had made leaps and bounds in her growth, at least in her mind, since that moment and with each minute became less Kali, and more Anya. At this point, there was no way not to view her as her own, unique, individual.::

    :: B’Sara blinked. Her throat felt scraped and raw while she sorted through a myriad of thoughts, feelings and emotions before jerking her head in David’s direction. ::

    Cavann: That’s cloning. It’s not my field, but I know the theory. Replication down to the chromosomes... but the issue is say, Mickey died, and his wife knew there was a way he could be brought back. So you grab a bit of his DNA, maybe you have his molecules on file. Everything about him, right? So we make a clone duplicate of him... but right away, there’s going to be something a little different. Little things at first. Tastes, food preferences... formal shirts instead of T’s. There’s no such thing as a perfect clone. They will always be a little different, until an emergent mind forges his or her own unique personality, while similar, is vastly different from the original. So she didn’t get Mickey back, she got Mike instead. Does that sound crazy?

    Nicholotti: ::Smiling reassuringly.:: Go on. You don’t sound crazy at all yet.

    ::It was an attempt at humor, and the conveyance of a message that said it was okay to just be herself, whatever that entailed. Kali had a vested interest in this and now it ran deeper than herself and her crew. That, in and of itself, was a strange feeling. The sudden idea of what might have happened had she fought for Rowena, and if Makal had stayed around, kicked her in the head, so to speak, but she quickly dismissed it. That opportunity had been long gone, and long dead.::

    ::B’Sara glanced back, seeing the bar, but couldn’t see David. She could feel him though... ::

    Cavann: I look at him... I see him, and it feels like David. His mind, his emotions... but it’s like the package doesn’t quite line up, even though it’s same features I’ve looked up to since I can remember. At first I thought... ::a nervous laugh:: I thought he might be something like a false face.

    ::She didn’t want to revisit the “incident” in the brig, and cleared her throat, feeling her cheeks flush. ::

    Cavann: Any case, I can’t pin it down, but there’s just something off. Sounds crazy, right?

    ::Kali looked at her and thought about what she had said. Something was... off. Crazy? No. This was his daughter, and seeing as she had picked up the mannerisms that David often showed, if anyone could see something being amiss, this girl would be the one. In the back of her head, something clicked, though the significance of it was still lost on her. The brief moments where David had seemed far away, distant, pained even, and with what he’d told her she could certainly see where something might have seemed off.::

    ::And hadn’t he said that it was only since he’d been found on that planet...?::

    Nicholotti: ::Softly.:: Not at all. You know him best. If you say something’s off, then... ::She changed the focus.:: What do you think it is?

    Cavann: ::shivering, in spite of the warmth:: ...I think something happened to him. I don’t what, or when, or who or why. People don’t just vanish off starships without leaving some kind of trace. ::smiling a bit:: Dad calls it Locard’s Principle. It’s true. There’s always an exchange of something. I couldn’t get access to all of it, though. ::suddenly diverting her attention back to the Captain:: Where was he found?

    ::Blinking for a moment, Kali recalled the vague information she’d read surrounding David Cody when he had first come aboard. It had been in the middle of the shadow crisis, which was soon followed by the attempt on her life, the creation of Anya, and the chaos in Thracian space. The result of it all was that reading reports and files hadn’t been at the top of her list. Still, she did recall some of it, on account of its strangeness.::

    Nicholotti: A planet near the edge of the galaxy. Alone.

    ::Which made it all so much more strange. Not only had the universe gone to great lengths to bring him here and now, but he’d disappeared from a starship and ended up on a planet no one had ever heard of before.::

    :: B’Sara stared at this woman, who she had just joined her crew, blinking at she heard something that made her feel hollow inside, as if somehow there was some kind of echo from a crazy dream, or maybe another life from the time she was a child and suffered a horrible nightmare of things like facedancers, and invisible creatures called Ixvapyans who swarmed and bombed her home. At the edge of the galaxy... she closed her eyes. Dad said something once, the last time they had been together, hadn’t he? ::

    :: Alll of a sudden, B’Sara couldn’t breathe, holding herself close and found herself staring at the water, hearing her Captain’s words. ::

    Cavann: At the edge of the galaxy...

    Nicholotti: I don’t know all of the details, yet, but I know they traced some kind of signal to that planet, where they found him.

    :: Signal? The only signal Starfleet officers had were their combadge. She glanced sharply up at the Captain. ::

    Cavann: ::almost disbelieving, whispering:: You believe me...?

    ::Smiling reassuringly, Kali pushed the other side of the girls’ hair behind her ear and let her hand settle on her shoulder.::

    Nicholotti: I’ll help you find what you’re looking for. We’ll figure this out.

    ::Of course part of that would be talking to David himself. She wondered how he would take this, or the fact that Kali’d caused such emotional distress for his daughter. She frowned slightly, hoping with everything she was that she could not only help, but build something here. It was almost a desperate feeling deep within, as if something she’d always wanted was just within her reach and somehow she could capture it, or cause it to flutter away.::

    Nicholotti: I promise, B’Sara.

    ::B’Sara bent forward, trying to put her thoughts in order and remember events that happened almost three years ago. Before she left. Before she left for Betazoid, and before dad left in the Independence to chase after the USS Phoenix, stolen by the Grendallai and the Ixvapyans. She knew that much... and she suddenly knew there was one Independence member left she knew to go to. ::

    ::But she had to be sure first. She swallowed, and looked up at the Captain, or this would be mom, or something... she didn’t know what. ::

    Cavann: I need to see her.

    Nicholotti: ::Puzzled.:: Who?

    Cavann: I need to see your twin and ask her something. And then Commander Breeman.

    ::Things started to connect in the eyes of the girl who had, moments before, fallen to pieces. Perhaps all she needed was someone to believe her, though Kali wasn’t quite sure she liked the idea of where these things were leading them. But ignoring something didn’t make it go away; if something was wrong, she needed to find it, and fix it, no matter the fears of losing the idea of a family that she’d just found...::

    ::No, she wouldn’t lose that. She refused.::

    Nicholotti: Alright. We can talk to Anya tomorrow... why Commander Breeman?

    Cavann: ::managing a sad smile:: He was there when my dad disappeared.

    ::That made sense. Kali nodded slowly.::

    Nicholotti: We also need to talk to someone else. David.

    ::He would be able to tell Kali things she’d not thought to ask. Perhaps they could get to the bottom of this and it would be nothing. Maybe it was just a bad dream.::

    :: Yes. There was that, too. B’Sara sniffed, wiping her eyes and had this horrid vision she now looked like a wreck. She wasn’t much on the cosmetic side of things, but did wear some. She choked up a chuckle as she found a measure of composure. ::

    ::Kali smiled. Whatever it was, they would all have each other. All she could do was build on what she had started here; leaving, stepping away, going back to the way life was before she met him... all of that was well outside of the realm of possible. He was her sun, and B’Sara only made the scene more wonderful. It was family, and she’d fight for it with everything she had.::

    Cavann: ...so how much of a train wreck do I resemble?

    Nicholotti: ::Shaking her head.:: Probably less than you would imagine.

    ::Certainly it was noticable that something had happened, but Kali figured it could be much worse. Still, she wondered if there had been another way, a way that would have avoided such problems and emotional reactions. Turmoil had been the last thing Kali had set out to create, and yet somehow... ::

    Cavann: ::smiling:: If you’re carrying, mind if I borrow some of your make-up?

    ::Blinking, Kali pulled her mind from the past and looked at the smiling face before her. Unable to help it, she smiled back and shook her head.::

    Nicholotti: You could, had I brought it, but generally I don’t. ::Glancing around.:: It’s thinning out a bit though. We don’t have to stay....

    ::B’Sara glanced around. Granted, they had been sidetracked, but she hadn’t realized the crowd began to thin out. She ran a hand through her hair, tucking it back. ::

    Cavann: They’re not going to say anything?

    Nicholotti: I don’t think anyone will question where you’re going if the Captain goes with you. ::Grinning.:: Well, almost anyone.

    ::There was David, and he would probably wonder, especially if he got a good look at B’Sara’s face. Kali tried not to worry about that conversation though. Hopefully he would understand what had happened and the way that the strongest bonds were formed.::

    ::B’Sara felt tired all of a sudden. Leaving sounded like a good idea. She nodded, and let the Captain lead the way while trying not to feel conscious of whatever the tears did to her features. She hung around the other side of Captain Nicolotti as they passed within her dad’s peripheral vision. She sure as hell didn’t want him to see her like this. ::

    Cavann: ::lowering her voice:: Where are we going?

    ::Kali only smiled and avoided any potentially questioning looks as they walked, intent on not getting sidetracked or caught up in the normal ‘captains’ politics. She looked over at B’Sara and spoke, realizing only after how complex this had all become in the blink of an eye. At one point, her family had been her crew, but this ran deeper. Suddenly there was more to her than the uniform. Suddenly she wasn’t her father, married to the corps and lost in a pit that was work and had taken over any semblance of love for his family. A brief look of distaste for the memories ran behind her eyes, but the smile remained.::

    Nicholotti: My place. ::She shrugged slightly.:: Home.

    ::B”Sara blinked, quiet a moment as they exited the holodeck before nodding. ::

    Cavann: Sounds good to me.

    ::And then they were on their way, the holodeck quickly left behind them as the two women, not in uniform, wove their way through people coming and going in relative silence. Home wasn’t far, but for the first time in as long as Kali could remember, it was farther than she wanted it to be. Actually wanting to be there was something new, and knowing David would be close behind them only made everything sweeter. Life itself, it seemed, had found a new path and it lead to places she’d never imagined.::

    Nicholotti: I was hoping you’d say something like that... ::Smiling again.:: Things are different now. You’re not alone. Not anymore.


    ::The sentiment was something she told B’Sara, but also herself. For a long time she’d felt alone, in the office centered in the Hub. Then David came along and twisted everything upside down. Even now the upheaval continued, though difficult at times, Kali wouldn’t trade the end results, the process, or the need to build for anything easier.::


    :: Alone. B’Sara tasted a bitter pill. She knew that long before coming to Starfleet. She even had a plan, but of course, that plan died back halfway through her studies. She blinked and felt her eyes widen... what she had set out to do, because she knew how he felt about her. Her heart thudded realizing everything was back in play again. ::

    Cavann: No. Not anymore, not ever again.

    Nicholotti: C’mon. Let’s go dig up some answers.


    ::And with that, Kali led the way home.::

    --


    Ensign B’Sara Cavann
    Science Officer
    StarBase 118 Ops

    &

    Captain Kalianna Nicholotti
    Commanding Officer
    Starbase 118

    • Like 2
  7. While I realize I may just be in an unseen que for notification, I can't ignore the possibility I may have missed something.

    Soooo... After posting an Arrival Introduction, is there anything I'm expected to do before training is scheduled.

    I have been dancing through the forum and website attempt to acquire some lay of the land though just wanted to make sure I hadn't missed sonething. smile.png

    I do have your application, and your class will start Monday, December 101th. thumbsup.gif

    I always thought December has only 31 days? ermm.gif

  8. I would set my story in the time after the return of Voyager, but in JJ Abrams universe. Maybe a bit improper, but that way I'd be able to explain the new technologies, that are not seen in previous Star Trek.

    Cast? Completely new people and I'd do my best to find a way to explain why they are all so young, yes, young characters and actors - except, Captain, of course. Characters? At least half of the main cast would be Alien species, non Terrans.

    Data/Odo type character would be THE Ship - AI Avatar; as yucky as it may sound, I'd make it comic relief for the start of the show, till everyone or get used to him/her - or make a set of rules where and when it can appear. Of course, holoprojectors would be available throughout the ship, so if you have badly injured people, EMH will just jump/appear to them.

    Instead of commbadge - comm. device would be in thumb and forefinger, so instead of tapping the commbadge you'd just tap thumb to forefinger; universal translator would be small bugs in ears (receiver part, if everyone has translator from whatever to their language in their ears there's no need for more than that in personal use); Communicator - as send receive device would be in ears, with universal translator and sending device in jaw. Every and each of those pieces of the device would be or have locator - so no more losing people and inability to get a lock because commbadge is removed.

    Of course - exploration; my show would be return to roots and deep space exploration. New enemies, new friends. What kind of, I don't know, it's something I'd have to think about. It requires some thinking, but I'd try to invent something ominous, but fresh and different.

  9. Every place has its presence; smell, touch and feel. Has the emotion to it, yes that is best explanation, emotion of the place. It’s about what it is and what it does to people. It’s how it makes you feel.

    Then there are songs; oh yes, songs can be really nasty. Even if you don’t understand words, they will incite emotions and make you remember. Some people don't like songs and will throw stones on a nightingale to kill the emotion. Right now Segolene felt like doing just that.

    Segolene spent days in meditation trying to forget how she felt when Daryl touched her, trying to forget his smell, trying to take him out of her heart.

    ‘If you love something, let it go. If it comes back to you, it’s yours forever. If it doesn't, then it was never meant to be.’ She hated wise sayings; there was always one usable for whatever occasion. This one seemed like made for their relationship.

    Walking through the Starbase, Segolene ended on a bench by the big window. For some time now she let tears flow and didn’t even attempt to brush them. Many people passed by her, watching her in surprise, scoff or even open disgust and noticing, not the look on their faces, but rather their emotions emanating, made her turn to the window, away from the station that made her feel so lonely and sad.

    It smelled like Starfleet, it felt same as Apollo, sensed like a happy days she remembered. ‘It’s better to never have, then to have and lose.’ She had that little bit of love, satisfaction, a touch of happiness… and then of a sudden just poof, gone as a soap bubble.

    Opening her bag she took out the padd and preparing it started recording the message. “I… I love you Daryl. They say, time heals every wound, but I refuse to remember you as a wound and I will keep, loving you. I had to go, staying would choke you and I love you enough to let you go and give you a chance to get along with yourself.

    When you’ll feel lonely, just close your eyes… because if you love me, if you really love me then just close your eyes and be sure I’ll know and I’ll be there with you. Close your eyes when you need a comfort and yes, if you love me, trust me I’ll know and I’ll be thinking of you.”

    She turned off the recording and shrugged. ‘This sounds like a love song, and a bad love song.’ She handed to erase the recording, but picking her bag she pressed the wrong button and a message was sent. Just then the sad love song started to play from somewhere down the corridor and in frustration; Segolene threw the padd that way and crashed it in the wall standing in the way.

    She shrugged again and went to docking ring to catch her transport.

    She looks back to the pieces of the crashed padd. ‘I hate cadences in minor key.’

    Some people don't like songs and will throw stones on a nightingale to kill the emotion.

    Cadet Segolene LeMarnix

    Science

    USS Apollo

  10. ((Dreamscape, Jaxx's Mind))

    ::Standing in the bright white abyss, Jaxx looked at himself noticing he was wearing a silk Betazoid ceremonial robe. He was confused. There was nothing around him but light. He felt alone, not being able to see anything. He started walking, but quickly realized there was nowhere to go. The longer he walked, the more he was confronted with the same sight. Andrus felt lost, with no clear direction in mind. He became anxious as he realized he had no control over the situation. No matter how hard he tried, there was nothing he could sense. It was as if he were in a void that did not exist. After what seemed like hours, he finally stopped walking and sat on the ground. It had been years since he meditated. It was another part of his culture that was easier to neglect. Closing his eyes, he found it hard to center himself. There was no noise, no distractions...only light. After a few moments, he heard a voice.::

    Saraa: ::in an angry tone:: What are you doing?

    ::Quickly, he opened his eyes. He looked around him in a panicked manner. Still, he could see nothing, feel nothing, sense nothing. He began taking deep breaths to enhance his level of calmness. A loud bang echoed around him. In an instance the light turned to darkness. Quickly jumping to his feet he began looking around once more.::

    Saraa: ::in a voice from behind him:: You have forgotten?

    ::Quickly turning around, he expected to find someone. For the first time he could feel something other than the ground beneath him. A subtle breeze was flowing from what seemed like every direction. The air was warm and moist. Andrus could still sense no one. The vast existence that was now black, continued to house nothing. His emotions began to race. Was it her? How could she be there? Was he dying?::

    Saraa: ::whispering:: Not yet...

    ::Turning around once more, he saw a shadow emerging from the darkness. The woman in front of his was an older reflection of the girl that died in his arms. He could not understand what was happening. He remembered his visit to the Mercury...returning to his quarters, but nothing afterward. He was flooded with questions that seemed more illogical than anything he had ever faced.::

    Jaxx: Who are you?

    Saraa: Andy, you were never one for stupid questions....::coyly:: why start now?

    ::There was a slight gasp. He had not been called that in years. Even then, she was the only one that did. It was a sort of pet name that he allowed her to call him. The truth was, he hated his first name. Andrus was his fraternal grandfather's middle name. It was something that his parents thought was important. His brother Leton, was named after their maternal grandfather. His parents thought it was important to honor their memories. Jaxx watched the figure closely as it neared him.::

    Jaxx: I find the question to be as valid as any other. ::shrugging:: I know very well who you look like, but since she is dead...you cannot be real. Therefore, you are either a figment of my imagination, or something else.

    ::The woman smirked slightly and folded her hands in front over her.::

    Saraa: Something else will do for now.

    ::Jaxx felt as if he had no control whatsoever. He prided himself on his ability to command a situation. There was once when he was more docile, but the death of the woman appearing in front of him changed all that.::

    Jaxx: Dammit, I want some answers!

    Saraa: ::snickering slightly:: Temper, temper. That is not the boy I once knew...he was so ::pausing:: carefree.

    Jaxx: ::rolling his eyes:: Things change, you for one should know that.

    ::Her death hit him hard. He was unable to stop it from happening, and her final breath was taken in his lap. They were betrothed, another great idea his parents had. He grew up with the girl and knew her well. As they matured, their parents thought genetic bonding would be the best course of action. She was the daughter of another house, and developing strong abilities. His mother, Bjenta, thought she was a prime candidate for introduction into their family. Back then, Jaxx did was he was told. He desperately wanted to do what was right for his family.::

    Saraa: Life has a funny way of facilitating that change. So...I ask again. What are you doing?

    ::Jaxx looked at the woman quizzically. He was never one for mind games, and came to the realization that he was not in control. There was nothing he could do to change that fact. He stowed his anger, and shifted to his [...]y, sarcastic self.::

    Jaxx: Apparently, I am standing here talking to the ghost of wars past. I figured you would have chains or something.

    Saraa: Well, that is a complete dramatization.

    Jaxx: ::laughing:: And you are not? ::tiling his head:: Tell me...what emotional response are you looking to illicit?

    ::The woman kept that smirk on her face as she began walking in a circle around him. He could hear her heals hitting the ground. It was the first time he could hear anything outside of her voice. It was growing hotter, and the air was slightly heavier with moisture.::

    Saraa: Do not know...what is there?

    Jaxx: What is that supposed to mean?

    Saraa: Are you daft?

    Jaxx: I guess so...so how about you take a moment of your non-existence to explain it to me. ::shrugging:: I am obviously going nowhere, ::lowering his brows:: and I do like a good story.

    ::Jaxx kept spinning in one place as the woman did laps around him, slowly.::

    Saraa: I die, and look at you! You have become a joke.

    Jaxx: I have actually been quite successful, thank you very much.

    Saraa: ::scoffing:: I forgot, captain sir...::giving a mocking salute:: That is not what I mean. You have never moved on. You have halfheartedly approached everything in your personal life since. So what? I died, Jazra died...it was WAR. What did you expect, uttaberries and sugar blossoms?

    ::Jaxx thought of the two women. He always felt guilty for falling for Jazra so quickly after the loss of Saraa. He tried over the years to justify what it was they shared. They were young, and he was grieving. Did he really use her to help get his mind off of Saraa? Or was it that she reminded him of Saraa so much? They were both among the strongest women he had never known.::

    Saraa: Then Talon gets attacked and almost dies. As soon as that happened...BAM! You shut down emotionally. ::rolling her eyes:: Then there was the Morgan girl...do you have any idea how much she loved you? She knew that you were so unsure and so scared, ::raising her voice:: She was Betazoid! Did you think you could hide that from her? ::maniacally laughing:: Then there was the little Gideon...what was her name? Tressa? Way to screw that one up!

    Jaxx: Do not presume to know me! ::yelling:: You have no idea what I have been through!

    Saraa: Are you so certain about that? I know everything you are too afraid to admit to yourself! One of the most brilliant psychologists, and you are clueless when it comes to yourself. Your mighty career...does it keep you warm at night? Does it share your joy? Your fear? Your anger? ::leaning in and yelling:: NO! So, I will try again...::in a loud tone:: What...are...you...doing?

    ::Jaxx looked that the woman. He tried to wrap his head around what was going on. He could sense nothing from her, and felt at a disadvantage. What did she want from him? To talk about his personal life? It was irrelevant next to his career. He watched the woman and her expressions. It was as if she could sense every thought, even though he could not even sense her presence.::

    Saraa: Your career is a pathetic replacement for love. You hated StarFleet! ::mocking his words as a teenager:: 'I will worry about Betazed, they can worry about everywhere else.' What happened to that, you sure seemed to join awfully quick.

    Jaxx: I finished school, and took a year off.

    Saraa: For your own form of retribution! What were you doing on Romulus? You ran right into the arms of the Federation and became their bloodhound!

    ::His eyes widened. His history between college and the Academy was classified, beyond StarFleet. He had never uttered a word about what he had done. It was not something he cared to remember. Those were different times, and he was still raging over the memories of the war.::

    Saraa: Then you join the Academy, become an officer and you have never looked back. Offering up any personal joy as a sacrifice to the mighty pip!

    Jaxx: ::raising his voice:: You have no idea what you are talking about!

    ::In a moment, the woman morphed into the likeness of Sidney. His eyes widened slightly at the unexpected shift. A different flood of emotions began to surface. He recalled the night before, and the sleeping woman he left in his bed that morning. He centered himself and looked at the figure in front of him.::

    Saraa(Sidney): And how long until you push me away? A month? Three? What is another broken heart? If you cared at all, you would end it now! We both know you are incapable of being happy. You still cling to all the pain in your past, and you use it as a scapegoat to seclude your feelings.

    Jaxx: ::shaking his head:: That is not true. I did all I could!

    ::Once again, she morphed into the likeness of Jazra.::

    Saraa(Jazra): ::rolling her eyes:: Did you? It seems like the bare minimum is all you could muster. How long did it take you to see someone after I died? Six years? Eight?

    Jaxx: ::quietly:: Ten.

    ::The woman morphed into the likeness of Saraa once more. She stopped walking in he circles and stopped. She walked toward him and softly touched his face. The feeling of her skin was cold. He did not pull away, as there was no fear within him.::

    Saraa: Why? You keep pushing them all away..what are you doing?

    Jaxx: I am not...

    ::Before he could finish his sentence the woman morphed once again into a copy of Jaxx in his uniform. Taking a step back, he looked at that man in front of him. The only thing he could sense was his own feelings. The man employed the same [...]y grin Jaxx had trademarked over the years.::

    Saraa(Jaxx): What am I doing?

    ::Thinking for a moment, Jaxx looked at himself. He took a second to relieve everything in the past. It was all true. He was using his starship to run away from the very thing he could never escape...himself. Inside, he was still that boy fighting a man's war. The scars had never healed, and as soon as he was reminded of how great life could be...he shut down. For the fist time, he was able to identify the problem. Fixing it was another story altogether. Looking at himself, he finally had an answer...even though it was not much.::

    Jaxx: I do not know, but I intend to find out...and fix it.

    ::The darkness deepened and once again there was nothing. The light, the voices...it was all gone and there was nothing there to replace it. He was unable to continue with his train of thought, but mentally he found himself reaching out...with nothing in sight. The darkness was all he knew, and all he could know.::

    TBC

    Captain Andrus Jaxx

    Commanding Officer

    USS Apollo, NCC-71669

    Captains Council Magistrate

  11. Fantastic. I didn't encountered many sims that made me tremble. When I saw it at first I thought, "Oh no, just descriptions!" Then started to read and couldn't stop. Stream of thought reminds me of Philip K.[...] - whom I consider one of the best SF writers of all times. Even lot of hard, heavy words (some of which I understood only from context and will have to check them in dictionary) didn't take anything from the ease it flew and ease it's reading.

  12. ((Space))

    ::Within the eternal silence of the all encompassing vacuum, there was only

    death. Where life erupted outwards from the violent conflagration of a

    million tiny points of light, darkness remained ever patient for the moment

    of ambuscade; where atomic motion and cellular mechanisms coalesced to

    contrive creations never before imagined, the inveterate Cimmerian shade

    began its inevitable encroachment on life's sojourn. Life, despite its

    ignorant declarations, did not endure. Only annihilation endured as the

    darkness of the universe closed in and suffocated everything it

    surrounded.::

    ::And in time, all that existed sought absolution.::

    ::The Terran beings had a saying; nothing lasts forever. But they too were

    shortsighted even in this. Going about their inconsequential routines,

    seeking out meaning, matriculating upon new paths, and evolving, the tiny,

    complex combinations of pieces that were at one time stars, rode furiously

    straight into oblivion. Reaching out into the heart of caliginosity had only

    prolonged the inexorable truth that the end was just around the corner.::

    ::But the Terrans, and their allies, were inconversant with the very

    universe they traversed and professed to understand. Though they could see

    into the inky blackness, they did not know her. They did not recognize the

    persistent tightening of the noose, nor, in their self-proclaimed

    enlightenment, did they comprehend the nefarious malignance that was

    inherent within the very absence of all. Nothing was intrinsically

    auspicious as the creatures believed. And it would be that belief that would

    guide them all to a potentially premature eradication.::

    ::Contrary to the purported cogitations of those same creatures, who, in

    reality, knew far less than their egotistical minds asserted, space was far

    from the vacuous vacuity it was postulated to be. No, it was saturated with

    things and concepts that the fracturable beings could never hope to

    comprehend. Waves of information traversed vast distances in ways yet to be

    discovered by the simple minds housed within the metallic structure, against

    which those very swells broke as if they had found their way to some cosmic

    beach. With the compounded force of the universe's lackadaisical stance and

    the pernicious tendencies of the dark nonexistence, it reverberated through

    the so-called marvel of Terran engineering at incomprehensible speeds.::

    ::What was not known, or understood by those that resided within, was that

    the constricting tendrils of suffocation, made of the timeless endurance of

    nothing, had allies. If there was an inherent malevolence all around that

    simply waited out life as it came, and went, there was an even more inherent

    defect in life itself. Where the nothing remained apathetic and patient,

    life was filled with the whims of loathsome indifference, obscene greed,

    vile lust, and an overwhelming need to create pain while tearing the good

    asunder. Life, as it were, took care of its own annihilation, leaving the

    [...]able nonentity to snuff out only the dying embers of it all.::

    ::In time, the war whose existence made itself known on the trails of

    subspace waves and informative streams the Terran's were unable to detect

    would also pass, but not before oblivion laid claim to souls too numerous to

    count. Klingons, Romulans, Terrans and many others would be caught up in the

    righteous event, each seeking something that even the bulk of spinning metal

    in space knew to be only a weak dream of mildly sentient life. Altruism was

    a laughable ideal; love did not exist outside the minds of the most fragile

    of all species in the universe. And yet, they fought. They simply did not

    know what they truly fought against.::

    ::The wispy fingertips of asphyxiation reached now for the structure that

    seemed so huge to the creatures that inhabited it, but which, it knew, was

    really barely an afterthought within the context of the enormity of the

    universe. They grew ever closer as a prodigious shadow fell across two

    empires and began to devour it all.::

    --

    'Starbase 118's Perspective'

    Simmed by

    Captain Kalianna Nicholotti

    Commanding Officer

    Starbase 118 / USS Victory

  13. If you need help with character creation feel free to ask for help, but let me recommend you two links for the start.

    100 Questions is great start in deciding what you want with your character.

    Duty post page on our wiki will tell you more about positions choices and responsibilities

    You can choose a character from the Hatchery.

    Or choose interesting and unusual race from the list of permitted species from ILI (Intelligent Lifeform Index).

  14. ((First Officer’s Quarters, USS Apollo))

    ::A puff of steam rose from the plain white mug that sat alone on the small dining table. It lingered for a moment, as if testing the air around it, before finally dissolving into the nether. In a chair that matched the architecture of the table, with her chin on her knees, her knees pulled up to her chest, and her arms around them, Cayden sat in the silence and found herself simply watching the steam that the mug of coffee was emanating. The simplistic nature of the moment, in a dimly lit room that was supposed to mimic the luminosity of the early dawn, caught her mind somewhere between the delicate fantasy of a dream and the much harsher way of reality; in a place where she walked with herself.::

    ::There were no sounds, save for those of the breaths she took and the subtle hum of the ship as it too breathed around her. So often these days, noise filled the air around her. So often, her mind was filled with the darker simulacrums of her past or the brilliance of her future, but rare was it that she found herself caught within a moment in time. Rare was it that she found herself between the two ends of the vastly capacious spectrum. And yet here, as another puff of white steam met the cooler air that hung just above her table, it was in that existence that she now found herself lost.::

    ((Flashback, 195 Years Ago, Trill))

    ::Having rolled up the legs of his pants and tossed his shoes to the side, a rather good looking man grinned somewhat mysteriously at an equally stunning woman as they walked, arm in arm, down the length of an empty beach. The waves lapped softly up to them as they walked, missing their bared feet by only a few inches. White spray, filled with the scent of salt, splashed up around them as if responding to the tiny grains of dark brown sand that their own steps were tossing haphazardly into the wind that blew both of their hair back. In the distance, the sun was just beginning to fall down beneath the horizon, giving off the distinct impression that the star itself was dying as rays of yellow, red, and orange bled into the water and spread in the waves.::

    ::The chill of the night was already upon them, and though the scene on the beach would lead onlookers to believe something else, the only warmth that existed in that moment was that caught within the fragile flesh that walked between the ever growing night breeze and the cold winter ocean. But the two continued to walk, unfazed by the chill or the growing darkness. Indeed, all light that was needed was provided by the stars, and as Rodan would have said, the look in her eyes.::

    ((Flashback, 121 Years Ago, Aboard a Small Research Station in Low Planetary Orbit of Trill))

    ::One day, she dreamed wistfully, the barriers that existed would fall. One day, the mind would understand far more than it did now and the stars themselves would be theirs to hold in the palms of their hands. There wouldn’t be the need to pick and choose between one way of living and another; both would be able to thrive within a rapidly growing exosphere that only expanded as knowledge moved forward. Diseases would be vanquished, pain would fade, and questions not even asked yet would have answers.::

    ::A sigh escaped her as she stared out into the darkness of planetary night. It was the only period of an orbit where she could see the stars in all of their brilliance and glory. As such, she’d stop her work for just a moment each time the station passed into the darkness and let her thoughts travel along the very same cogitation. The future seemed so incredibly far away, and yet, it was something she was reaching for anyways. And while, in the end, she knew that it would not be her that was able to walk among those points of light that were the stars, at least she would be there in some manner of thought.::

    ::Subconsciously, her hand moved to the area of her stomach where the symbiont had recently been placed. Still working on integrating the previous hosts memories into her own, she had requested this assignment, but now she wondered. Just how much isolation could she take? It was a question that she asked herself; one that mirrored the one her boss had asked her just before launch.::

    ::Yet somehow, the answer she had given then – that she’d always have Rodan to speak with – held much less water now than it did then.::

    ::The first glimmer of the sun could be seen as its light scattered across the atmosphere of the planet below. Within seconds, it would return to its complete blinding brilliance, and so, Eliza turned back to the terminal and began to run the numbers of the experiment again. Under the microscope, tiny nano probes began their workday all over again.::

    ((Flashback, 64 Years Ago, USS Andromeda))

    ::The darkness around him swirled and coalesced into images created by his own imagination. Beneath him, the bed seemed far softer than the chair he spent most of his time in during the day and when coupled with the soft tones of the ‘music’ he’d heard since the ship entered the area of space known as the Typhon Expanse, his body simply let the trappings of the day fade into nothingness. It was this time of the day he enjoyed the most; when the neoteric quiescence of night allowed the voices of the past to whisper directly into his mind. The very epitome of being Trill, it was in this experience that everything existed.::

    ::Sleep, itself, never came easily, but he didn’t mind. He had freed himself from the constrictions associated with the uniform that lay draped across the back of a chair in the corner of the room that he could not see, but knew was there. And in his newfound freedom, deep contemplation danced a complex waltz with introspection. Intuition wrapped itself up in the ruminations of whatever situation faced them and answers were found.::

    ::The dance continued long into the hours that constituted night aboard the tiny, when compared to the universe it explored, vessel that drifted nearly silently deeper into the perpetual night of space. With the continued backdrop of music, provided by the Expanse itself, Alaryc found a chance to really listen, and learn, from the history that had come before.::

    ((Flashback, 17 Years Ago, USS Valor))

    ::On the padd that was firmly grasped in her hands scrolled the words that answered every wish and prayer that she had ever had. They were simple, and they explained only what her next steps were, but it was one word at the top of them all that had her literally jumping for joy. Accepted. The word created ripples of elation within her entire body, instigating the intense flow of endorphins and bringing her to a level of jubilation she had never experienced before.::

    ::Still tightly holding the padd, the young girl ran out of the quarters that she shared with her parents to share the news that she would not be sharing them for much longer. Everything she had worked for, and everything that she had wanted was finally coming true; having been accepted to the University in Medara, soon she knew that she would be leaving her current life behind. There would be no more red alerts, or danger, or stuffy air that was simply recycled through the ship. No more warp core centered discussions at the dinner table, and no more going over emergency procedures that would take her to the lifepods; Jazra was about to set out on a new course.::

    ::It was a course that she had been striving for ever since she had first set foot on a starship. Having lived there most of her life, she had thrown herself into school, excelling past those that shared her age, and never making friends. Now, her long nights spent studying, and her lack of a social life, were finally paying off. And while she knew that her parents were still on duty, she didn’t care. This was something she needed to share, even if her running through the halls of the Valor brought quite a few strange looks. Even if the whole ship found her odd, or troublesome, or anything else. It didn’t matter anymore. All that mattered were the words; words etched into history on her padd.::

    ((Flashback, 14 Years Ago, Trill))

    ::It was funny how things often came full circle.::

    ::Standing in the courtyard in the capital city of Mak’ala, Norah let his eyes take in sights the Adyr symbiont had not seen in quite some time. Around him, people came and went, busy in their lives and wandering about their business. Each of them seemed too caught up in the moment to think about what might come in the next, but that didn’t stop him from contemplating his own end. Having just been joined, the susurrations of Jazra, and those that had come before, were bubbling up in his mind. Together they sang, as if in a chorus of voices that gave him insight into his own end; an end that was coming towards him faster and faster, with no brakes available to slow inevitability down.::

    ::And though the idea might have been disturbing to some, the old diplomat simply smiled at the oncoming cliff. His time had been long ago in days that were remembered with pleasant thoughts. Now, at least, he would be able to pass those moments on through the eyes of the symbiont he never thought he’d have. Perhaps, somehow, his experiences as a peace seeker, negotiator, and overall diplomat, would bring knowledge and patience to a place and time where it would really matter.::

    ::Though pained by the circumstances of her death, and the intense feelings for a certain Betazoid man, Norah knew that it was all part of the grand scheme. Together, Jazra’s short life would coalesce with those that had carried Adyr prior and build a legacy unlike any seen outside the planet on which he now stood. It was in that legacy that he found peace. Death was certain to come find him, and soon, but with a legacy like he had now, what more could he ask for?::

    ((End Flashbacks))

    ::A final puff of steam floated towards the ceiling as the most recent host of Adyr looked on. History danced around in her head, coming together into stories that were far better than fiction as her coffee fell inevitably to an undrinkable temperature. Perhaps it was the lack of steam, or the fact that her legs were cramping from how she had been sitting for so long, but she suddenly knew that it was time to go.::

    ::Standing, Cayden left the dining area and moved to the room to prepare for her day. In her wake, on the small dining table, sat a now-cooled mug of coffee that had not been consumed as one might have expected. Though it remained in the mug, and the mug on the table, it had become the catalyst for so much more.::

    TBC

    ---

    Lieutenant Cayden Adyr

    Mission Specialist/Command Advisor

    USS Apollo

  15. ((Ready Room, USS Apollo))

    ::After finishing his discussion in the holodeck with Hugh, Jaxx thought of orbital skydiving. He started down the corridor and realized that he really was not feeling up to it. He considered heading back to the casino, but decided that it was getting late. Turning around, he headed toward the turbolift. He took the lift up to the bridge and quietly made his way to the Ready Room. As he made his way in, he poured himself some Saurian brandy. With the glass in hand, he picked up a PADD and moved over to the door on the back wall. As it opened, he stepped into the small "crash room" that was connected. It contained a bed, and a lavatory with a sonic shower.::

    ::It was something new to the design of a starship. The thought was that there were times when a CO or XO would need to take a power nap during a crisis. Having a bed in the room kept them from having to leave the area of the bridge. He was not aware of many ships that had the accommodation, but was curious if all new classes contained the convenience. For Jaxx it was a way to avoid his quarters. He glanced to the uniform hanging up, as he took a sip of his beverage. They were on their way to the Trinity Sector, but he felt more stressed out than he did during the confrontation with the creature. He hated not knowing where and why they were diverted. Glancing down he looked over some reports on the PADD. Relations with the Klingons were not what they once were. During the Dominion War they were the Federation's greatest ally. Now they seemed to be acting like a spoiled child that had to have their way. The latest report placed a Klingon Fleet amassing in the Mempa Sector. Jaxx feared a power play for Romlulan held territories. It only made sense since that is where their destination was.::

    ::It had been some time since he last visited the Trinity Sector. His last official action in the area was to transfer command of StarBase 118 to Commander Nicholotti. He found himself hoping there was time to see his old friend. No matter what, he would make time to visit with her before leaving he area. It was hard to tell when the next time he would be in the area was. It was the life of a StarFleet officer. It had its up and downs, but never knowing where you were going to be one day to the next took its toll on many things. Relationships were not something that were easy to maintain. He was now single once again, and it was starting to become a cycle. The only saving grace was the fact that Tressa was alive. With losing his first two loves to the Dominion War, it left him slightly jaded. He found himself unable to open up like he should. It seemed that in his recent past, he was only able to open up to other Betazoids. It was due to the fact he could not hide his feelings from them. It was also the reason he avoided returning home. He looked at himself as a man of strength and it bothered him to have moments of weakness.::

    ::Finishing his drink, he kicked off his shoes and ditched the special attire. Laying down in the bed, he stared at the ceiling. After a few moments, he picked up the PADD and began looking for something to read that would keep his mind off of the way he was feeling. There were times he felt isolated among his crew. There were people he could talk to, but only about certain things. It was not the lack of accessibility, it was his lack of will. He was the captain of a starship, and felt he should not carry as much emotional baggage as he did. He worked hard to keep up the facade that everything was alright. He found himself burying his mind in work so that he could avoid thinking about where he was in life. For every success in his career, he had an equal failure in his personal life. One did not really affect the other, it was just a self observation.::

    ::Tossing his PADD onto the nightstand, he pulled the blanket over him. After a few moments he felt restless, tossing and turning trying to find a comfortable position. He realized that the bed was just as comfortable as the command chair. There was something about new vessels that did not cater to comfortability. He kept his eyes closed, seeking a peaceful slumber. It took quite a bit of time, and countless rotations in his tossing and turning, but in the end he was finally able to fall asleep.::

    ((Ready Room, USS Apollo - 0615))

    ::Usually he liked to start the day earlier, but he had forgot to set an alarm. He found himself moving from the edge of the bed to the shower. Once he was completed with the cleansing ritual, he put on the uniform that was waiting for him. He finished his morning routine of brushing his hair and teeth, and found his way out to the office. Replicating a cup of vreeca, he moved toward the desk. He opened the latest operations reports and was not surprised to find nothing new. He had only fallen asleep a few hours prior. It was an increasing problem for him. He found it harder and harder to fall asleep. It was the worst it had been since his coma a few years ago. He had not noticed any issues with his telepathic control, so he considered it an isolated incident. Had he not been the CO, he would have visited Sickbay to see if something was wrong. In his mind it would be admitting he had a weakness, or illness of some sort. He had no ambition of dealing with tests and scans from any of the medical staff. He trusted their skills, but was the type to only go to Sickbay when he absolutely had a good reason.::

    ::He continued to sit at his desk reading anything new that he had not laid eyes on. There was a good amount of information on the Klingons, and even some reports on Romulan movements. Since Romulus was destroyed, the Romulans kept having increasingly difficult times trying to reform. There were too many people seeking power, and the Empire was divided. He feared that the Klingons would use this as a reason to capitalize on the situation. He pressed a few buttons on the console and waited for the computer to chirp before speaking.::

    Jaxx: Personal Log, Stardate 238908.07. We finished locating and transferring the survivors from the Nelson. I have made the recommendation that StarFleet dispatch another vessel to the area for an extensive search. There were still escape pods that were unaccounted for. ::sighing:: Tressa is gone now, she and the kids transferred over to the Carpathia to hitch a ride to DS5. From there, they will be leaving on a transport for her next assignment. Having her base-side will be good for the kids. Honestly, I do not know what to think. I wish I could forget, and take away my regrets. If we could've started again, would it have changed the end? I do not believe in fate, I never have. I think that where you end up is a victim of circumstance and your choices along the road. ::scoffs:: Maybe I should avoid non-telepaths. It seems every time I do, it ends badly. Why am I so closed off? I swear by the deities, I have known me, my entire life...I have a doctorate in psychology, I have been a counselor...and I am still a mystery to myself. How can I expect anyone to "get me" if I cannot get myself? The only thing I seem to do right is perform my duties. Do I pour so much of myself into it, I am bound to fail at anything else? ::snickering as he shook his head in frustration:: They say "ask the questions" for that is the only way you can seek answers. I have been asking these same questions for years, yet here I am...still asking. I just...I do not know. End log.

    ::As the computer chirped once more, he rubbed his face and cupped his hands behind his head and leaned back. There were so many questions he had, and could not find answers for. He had no desire to see the counselor, or receive the cookie cutter treatment it would involve. It would have helped if Jaxx did not spend any time in the field. He had the same ability to ask the questions and give insight into the situation, but for him it did not help repair the feelings. Life was a compromise of happiness and unhappiness, he just wished they would find a better balance. Why did one have to be in his professional life, leaving nothing but unhappiness for his personal one? He sighed deeply and turned to the crew files. He had a 0800 meeting with a few officers, and it was time to get his mind in the game. He thought of each of the ones he had seen the night before. Just as a precaution, he sent Ra-Uleyra a message in case Viktor forgot to relay it. Once that was complete, he sat alone in silence waiting for the day to officially begin.::

    TBC

    Captain Andrus Jaxx

    Commanding Officer

    USS Apollo, NCC-71669

    Captains Council Magistrate

  16. clearly we need a British chat thing going on...

    We had one for two or three months and no one attended! tongue.png

    I was in one (only one since my arrival) held. There were 5-6 people in it and it was the only enjoyable chat I attended. Main chat is too fast for me and I was warned twice that I "ignored" somebody - the main reason I'm not attending them any more is because I don't want to insult anyone else.

    From my PoV that chat with 6 attendees was more successful than main chat with 15 - comparing here number of writers who are not from US.

  17. (( Deck 5, Holodeck 3, USS Apollo))

    :: Vik stood in the center of the room, looking at all the projection arrays and lifelessness of the room. It had always fascinated him how such a place could instantly be transformed into anything you could set your mind's eye on. He was wearing the preferred off-duty garb; a black wool pea-coat, a thin henley-style black undershirt and a pair of faded jeans. they were probably the only articles of clothing he had left from his time on Earth. His wardrobe mostly consisted of uniforms and the occaisional black suit for espionage. Non of that here tonight. ::

    :: He took the photo-file he was holding and opened it. It was the original electronic version that his father had given him right after the family split apart. He always told him to hang onto what he had left. Vik had looked through it from time to time, usually when he was thinking of his mother. He'd only been through a small portion of the videos stored inside, mostly because of the pain he felt; the pain of never being able to have those memories again. The smell of the faded metal enveloped him as he took off the leather casing. It wasn't very often he took this thing out of the leather, for he never knew what atrocity or accident might be waiting to take those memories from him. He closed his eyes and savored the moment. The very first picture was a picture of him and his mother standing in the kitchen. He pushed the button on the bottom signaling the book to play the video. ::

    :: He never remebered being that short or frail, or even the idea of baking in the kitchen with his mother. He smiled at the thought of who was behind the camera, and what it meant at the time. His father was capturing some important parts of Vik's childhood for him to remember always. Young Vik would stand up on his tip-toes and poke his finger in to the dough, with his mother turning to scold him. He laughed slightly with a broad smile on his face. He looked up and to the console by the door. He walked over briskly and connected the photo-file to the port. ::

    Lanius: Computer, run a file scan on the input I've supplied. render all points exactly as they are interpreted.

    Computer: Processing request, stand by...

    :: The room lit up all at once. The first thing to change was the smell in the room. Instantly he could smell bread baking. It was always one of his mother's favorite things to make, not to mention the most practical of all things. His mother appeared, along with the pint-sized Viktor standing right by her side. the fresh oak cabinets, the sun outside rising through the window, the table and chairs with the permanent coffee rings where his father once sat. It was all there. Even the breeze blowing through the open porch door could be felt, the same warm all-encompassing blanket that caught him every morning. It was real. ::

    Lanius: Computer... :: he paused for a moment biting his lip :: begin playback...

    :: The computer chirped and the action began. He was curious to this experience, as it was one that he didn't remember. It was something that his father recorded for him and his wife to recount after years of marriage. He didn't count on having to give it to his son to remember them by. The breeze could finally be heard, the door creaking as it shifted back and forth. His mother began to knead the dough in front of her, with pint-sized Viktor moving in for the kill. The finger made it to its target, as did his mother's ::

    Mary Ann: VIKTOR FAELRUN! How many times must I repeat myself, lord knows I'm soundin' like a broken record by now...

    :: Her irish accent was thick, just the way he remembered it. The computer had done a mint job in translating the audio feeds into reality. Little Lanius just looked as his mother and smiled a devlish little look. Vik couldn't help but laugh out loud, knowing that even though he didn't remeber this moment in time, it didn't surprise him at all. She turned to him and picked him up and set him on the counter. ::

    Mary Ann: D' you know what I'm bakin' boy? Any ideas?

    Little Lanius: No ma, none t'all.

    Mary Ann: This is your fadder's favorite... Friendship bread. And so it goes, dat whoever ya share it wit will be with ya forever. :: She offered him a piece of a finished loaf. ::

    :: He watched as the boy took the piece of bead and looked at it. He broke a smaller piece of it off and ate the other. He quickly hopped off the table and ran to the other side of the room, undoubtedly where his dad would have been standing. He knew that that little boy truly believed in what his mother had told him, and he knew exactly who he wanted to give that piece to. He just looked blankly for a moment at the small boy in front of him; the look of joy on his face, the sheer excitement of being able to share a family tradition with someone he loved. Vik closed his eyes as he felt the water welling. He bit his tongue striking away the urge to let loose. ::

    Lanius: Computer... Move to the last file... explain.

    Computer: Accessing. File contains verbal data stream, author, Faelrun Lanius III.

    Lanius: Generate male author, use files contained in the input I've provided. Use this model for playback of the audio.

    :: He knew it wouldn't be the same as hearing it straight from the old man's mouth, but it would have to do. He wasn't quite sure what he would be watching in the next few minutes, but in his mind, it was propbably something he needed to hear. He'd been avoiding that portion of video for long, long time. ::

    Computer: Acknowledged... *chirp chirp*

    :: At once the room turned black and a single light could be seen shing from ceiling to floor. Within the confines of the light the image of his father had appeared. The man was roughly 6'3 and of average build. The characteristic cleft graced his forehead signaling his lineage. His hair was still that jet black, and Viktor recognized him to be in his late 40's. He'd recorded this right after the splitting of the family. His face was expressionless as he seemed to stare right into Vik's eyes. He couldn't look away, not for a second. He hadn't seen the man since the happening. It was almost as if he simply vanished, never to be seen or heard from again. ::

    Lanius: Dad?

    :: The figure didn't move, or speak. He stood silent and stoic in a room of darkness. He wondered if the image created by the computer wasn't just some recreation of Viktor himself. He brought himself back center and remebered he was looking at an empty hologram, nothing more. ::

    Lanius: :: he said in an almost whisper like tone :: Computer... Begin playback...

    Faelrun: === Boy... I know that there's gonna be some things that I'm not gonna be able to explain to ya... Some hard things that, you wouldn't understand. Your mother and I... We both love you very much, don't ya doubt that for a second. It's just that, you're mother and I split for some reasons that I'm not proud of. Some things I did when I was away. I told ya both it was business... :: The man looked at the ground now. The computer had rendered what emotion it could into the hologram :: I'm sorry for being such a scoundrel son... Boy... the truth of the matter is that I wasn't faithful. I met someone in Dublin. We'd been seeing each other for quite a few months... The day I left is the day I told yer ma. I love you boy... I do. :: The tears were welling in his father's eyes, and Viktor's :: I just wish I could have been around to see you grow up, to see you in your uniform and to hold you tight on your graduation day. To be able to see your future family, your wife, your kids... I threw all of that away on account of a lust that lasted a few months. Don't hate me boy... I guess, what I'm telling ye... is don't be a hard callous man like myself. Don't throw it all away, when it's right there in front of ya...===

    Lanius: Freeze program...

    :: He was crying now, standing there in the holodeck with his holographic father. It wasn't the words that had hurt him the most. It was the realization of just how much he'd lost by trying to understand his father. He'd turned into the man without ever realizing it. He began to feel the sadness slowly slip away and become replaced by anger. It was true, he was angry at his father for what he'd done. But now more than ever he was angry for taking his character from him and replacing it with his own. He instantly felt a rage take over, and he lashed out throwing a punch straight through the hologram and into nothing. He fell to the floor on his knees and collected his face in his hands. He began to scream into his hands. He jumped up and turned to the image ::

    Lanius: YOU KILLED US! YOU TOOK EVERYTHING FROM US YOU OLD WRETCH! AND WHAT ARE WE LEFT WITH.... :: he was breathing heavy as he spoke :: Nothing but shadows and dust...

    :: He sat now on the floor of the holodeck. oO Was it worth it? All of this? Oo. He thought about it intensely, about how this would affect him for the rest of his life. The man that he thought he knew to be one of chivalrous intentions, who taught him about how important family was, and how at no cost should it be broken up. And to learn that the polar opposite was true of him, it made the last 7 years of searching for the real reason seem like a huge void that could never be filled. He decided right then and there on the floor of the holodeck aboard the USS Apollo, that no longer would he be living in the shadow of the father he could have had. Instead, this was his time. ::

    :: This was the time to learn who he was, not his father. He knew the truth, and because of that, he no longer had to live in the dark. And to think that a trip to memory lane was sparked by a simple dinner in C39, amongst all the madness that had just ensued, it made Vik smile. He wiped the tears from his eyes and stood once more. he turned back to the image of his father. ::

    Lanius: And sometimes from the dust rises the courage to carry on... And carry on I shall...

    :: He turned and gathered the photo-file putting it back into it's leather case. he grasped it tightly for a second, and slipped it back into his coat pocket. He turned to his father once more, and with a smile spoke ::

    Lanius: Computer... End program...

    --

    Lieutenant JG Viktor Lanius

    Intelligence Officer

    USS Apollo, NCC-71669

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