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Paul Sharpe

Funny things heard on the USS Gorkon

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It was interesting to watch the man cycle through focus, frustration and then to serenity, and she half-wondered if he was somewhat touched in the head.

::Well, maybe he was. They'd all heard rumours of what had happened to various people last mission.

 

This is my favorite!!

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 As for Jang there was something about that scamp something loveable in a how you can love something that would spill your blood everywhere kind of way. - Ensign Ferier Lanta

This really tickled me!

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::Some years ago Eerie had assisted in child birth. It wasn't that particularly difficult, however, the Brikar would much rather take on some Breen warriors than the delivery of a new child. Eerie was hoping that his medical skills would not be needed. However, he had done alright the first time.  He wasn't looking forward to doing it again. Actually for some odd reason Eerie was natural with babies.  He had found out that during his first year at the academy he was the perfect babysitter when a Commanders wife had hoodwinked Eerie into baby sitting during a social event. The baby didn't utter a sound as Eerie held the baby for over a hour. It was even suggested that Eerie baby sit as a regular duty until the Commander put an end to that idea.::

- Lt. Commander Eerie

I really liked the idea that Eerie is a natural with kids. 

Can we have Eerie running the Gorkon's child daycare centre?

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:: Well that said alarming things about the state of the ship’s security, would anyone bat an eyelid if Lieutenant Yiggtissi strolled through the corridors of the Gorkon wielding a chainsaw? Or would questions only be asked once Lieutenant MacFarlane took to running around with a flamethrower.:: - Lt zh'Aella

 

Are you expecting me to run around with a flamethrower? Because I will

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CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.

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::Lanta, being bereft of a will to live, moved in front of the group.:: - Lieutenant JG Jocelyn Marshal

I love this line! 

:w00t:

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@Sera zh' Aella - :: She screamed at the top of her lungs while gesturing to the evil black and brown stripped creature residing on her bed. Whatever happened, that bed would need to be dropped into the nearest black hole. :: - If Sera had here way, she'd have had the Gorkon torpedo the camp from orbit. Spider would survive.

@Ayiana - ::It was pretty easy to figure out why people started calling Ayiana “Red.”:: - Anger issues, I suspect... Who said that?! :sweating:

@Trellis Vondaryan - ::It was a nice backside. Whoever said Starfleet uniforms weren't flattering hadn't been privy to this one.:: - He has to look the Admiral in the face after this. Holy hell, that's going to be funny. Machiavellian Trellis is a riot.  :devil:

 

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@Quinn Reynolds - Brunsig: That goes both ways. How about you tear your eyeballs off her [...] and earn your keep? - I have an unholy love for this man.

@Trellis Vondaryan & @Tasha MacFarlane - He lurks in the dark, he sniffs wine (we think it's wine), and has more shade than Rembrandts "The Stoning of St. Stephen." I call vampire.

 

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MacFarlane: Well… I… err… this ::She rolled her collar down and exposed her neck to him, showing off the purple mark.:: I woke up with it, a’... well, I checked m’ clothes with a tricorder. It found some Vissian DNA an’ yer th’ only Vissian I could find on th’ Gorkon, so…

::She trailed off, not exactly sure what to say next, nor exactly sure where the conversation was likely to end up.::

::Trellis peered at the mark on the woman’s neck. He was unsure what it meant. He didn’t know enough about her to know if she always had such a mark on her neck. Trills had spots on their bodies, after all, and Humans often had birthmarks. Was this not one of those?::

Vondaryan: We did go to the party, yes. I’m sure we must have interacted somehow, explaining the DNA. Is that mark not normal for you?

 

 

Edited by Jo Marshall
Added another one, 'cause I'm lazy and do things in bulk.
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Seduction 101 by @Cory Stoyer - Dude, I love you.

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Stoyer: Uh... Well, it is a tall, blonde, buxom, blue eyed... Look I was just talking. The reason I never asked you out was you are very intimidating. I watched you handle that phaser mini-gun Tasha put together for you.

 

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Marshall: Can you induce a haemorrhage? Without beating me to a pulp.

All of the recent sims have been cracking me up, and I feel I should be putting more of them in here. This particular line had me in stitches for several minutes.

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@Ferier :: Nkai adopted the face of someone who looked like they had found latinum then found it was plastic.::

::Cries in Rodulan::

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Vondaryan: Besides, I like watching others. People are so fascinating, and not strictly from an intelligence perspective. It's amazing what you can learn just by observing others. Their posture, their hands, their eyes, their words. People speak volumes without ever talking, if you know what to look for.

 

Sevo: Yea, that’s not creepy at all.

@Ayiana Sevo  - Default response to Vondaryan when he's being all enigmatic

Edited by Jo Marshall
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Sevo: So... I’m right? I’m not crazy and paranoid?

Vondaryan: The two are not mutually exclusive, Commander.

Trellis can throw shade every once in a while. So deadpan.

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Sienelis: Uh huh. Which makes it all the more embarrassing that you invented the warp drive a hundred years after they did.

@Quinn Reynolds - Casually rolling out those burns.

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sh’Kavhilji: You are Betazoid? Please forgive me for staring, but I think I can see your eyes as black. Additionally your mind is better shielded than most of the crew. It is very soothing to not have an unshielded mind screaming out beside me.

@Tasha MacFarlane - My mental image of everyone's mental monologue on the ship is now a long series of ARRRRGHGHHGHHHHHHHHHH! *breath* ARGGGHHHGHHHH!

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T. Sevo: I’LL HAVE YOU KNOW THAT I WAS A MARINE BEFORE YOU WERE A GLINT IN YOUR MOTHER’S EYE!! I FOUGHT TOOTH AND NAIL AGAINST HORDES OF JEM’HADAR WHEN YOU WERE BARELY OUT OF DIAPERS!! COMPARED TO LOSING MY HOME, BABYSITTING A BUNCH OF PANSY-A** MILK-DRINKING RANGERS WAS A VACATION!! YOU THINK YOU CAN LEAD THIS CLASS BETTER THAN ME, MAGGOT?! HOO-YAH!!

@Ayiana Sevo - Nice to know some Marine traditions are alive and well :w00t:

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Yep. Emma's not too thrilled with the culture, but I couldn't pass up the opportunity. 

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::@Cory Stoyer knew that A) Tasha would do her best to drag him there. B) Ayiana would have security drag him there. C) They would get the skipper involved.  The last one scared the heck out of him.::

Between a rock and a hard place.

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5 hours ago, Samira Neathler said:

@Ayiana Sevo Thanks needed the laugh. :P

ops keep on opsing 

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::The second Trill set to work on the first, removing the layers of smeared makeup. Tasha wasn’t sure what product was used, but it seemed powerful enough that it could make a viable cleaner for the plasma conduits. There was a definite alcoholic scent to the mystery liquid Tasha decided, yup, she could certainly use it to clean the plasma conduits.::

Engineering never takes a break. :D

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